How important is sex to you?

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There are plenty of couples in relationships who do not have sex for one reason or another, often health-related. To say that those relationships are less strong or good or healthy is ridiculous. They may even be *stronger* because they can stay together without sex. Not all people are going to run off and find someone to have sex with just to have sex. If they are committed to their SO, then they are committed. This is why married people vow to stay together "for better or for worse." Lack of sex may be for the worse, but too bad. It happens. Sometimes it happens for a short time, sometimes it may be for the rest of their married lives.

Sex should never be more important than the people in the relationship. Sex can enhance a relationship, but should not define it.

Sex is of relatively low priority for me. It is important to me because it's important to my husband, and that's about it. I do enjoy it, but if I wasn't married I probably would not care if I never had sex again. What's important to me is companionship, support, and intellectual stimulation.

This is why I say sexual compatibility. A relationship where both parties dont care works just fine. They dont need it then. But if you need it, you need it. For someone that requires it highly, it would be very hard to do without it for any reason.

Now would I leave or cheat on my wife if she couldn't anymore for a health reason? No I wouldn't. However it would be very hard to live with and likely would impact my happiness severely. I would do my best to shoulder that burden for her sake and to live up to my commitment, but the quality of our marriage would no doubt suffer because I would be in constant frustration.

However Im sure in that case we would get more creative about ways to satisfy me and that would work just fine.

I agree with you on these points.

I also think that in many relationships, there is one person (usually the husband) who needs more sex. Frankly, I think it is the duty of the wife to not put him off. That would be unfair and could lead to marital problems. It is much easier for the person who cares less for sex to have it more often than for the person who needs more sex to go without. I personally don't care if I don't have sex, but my husband and I actually get it on pretty often because he DOES care. This is one way I show him that I love him.

All these things change with age and family circumstances, too.

When my kids were younger and climbing all over me, the last thing I wanted was sex. I was exhausted and completely fried by the kids. My sensory overload was super high. Sex would be one more sensory thing that would be WAY TOO MUCH. Even now, if I have an extreme amount of sensory input or social activity, I will NOT be in the mood and cannot easily be convinced. My husband knows this (now) and will give me space. He *craves* sensory input. So, you can see why sex would be important. I understand that (now) and willingly do my part.

But, we went through a period where we were fighting over this issue quite a bit. We learned how to communicate and work it out. That's what couples need to do. Communication and being unselfish are the most important things.

I don't seem to be properly equipped to provide emotional sustenance and intellectual stimulation to anybody.

I'd say it's not that important to me, but I wouldn't really know I guess, I've never had it.

once you've had it you want more.

That's what I'm afraid of , I've got the looks to probably get it pretty easily if I used tinder or something similar, but I'd rather not become a sex addict.

For me, it's very important.

it hurts nobody if you use one of those topco cyberskin @$$es, I highly recommend them

Not if you are asexual. Then it is likely the reverse as the experience is probably bad and you got nothing out of it.

the playwright George Bernard shaw had a similar experience which made him leery of sex.

Getting my "rocks off" is number three on my top five list of most important things in my life, behind (#1) food and (#2) money.
Of course, beer (my #4) can sometimes lead to intimacy, and that can lead to...well you know, so it's like a virtual tie.
Getting my rocks off as a result of intimacy is always best, but I do pretty nicely on my own also.
FWIW, Crazyfool, my largest group effort was a "four-way" back when I was 21.

how does a 4 way work?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gang_bang

Sex is important? There is no answer here. To be honest here, as being a virgin. Sometimes I see in the society that sex is important but also sometimes not important. From my circles of friends I have it seems not important. They are very committed kind of people, and also struggle in finding opportunities. All of my kinds of friends, they aren't like college kids, bogans/ferals or some sort of stereotypes that make sex appear important.

However, in reality it does not. People in our communities are always out there. Doing many things that are non-sexual such as going to work, play sports, shopping, house chores, driving a car and so on. Sex isn't happening 24/7. In addition there are a lot of people in Gen-Y aren't having sex either, since the issues of anxiety and depression. This is big influence in Australia, Canada, NZ, USA and UK.

So the answer is, sex is not important. We all will can and still can do it, but it not like overdoing it.

oh. sorta like "pulling a train."