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Physical Attractiveness - Nature vs Nurture

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Alliekit
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12 Jun 2016, 5:42 am

MaxE wrote:
Alliekit wrote:
(what's been said so far)
Please let me restate my original comment. So a guy meets a girl whom he does not find especially attractive, but then she makes evident to him the fact that he is physically attractive to her. I mean strictly in the physical sense. After which, his whole attitude towards her changes, and he wants to be with her as much as he can. I know this can happen because it happened to me. I don't think it would happen to a guy who has never had much problem finding female companionship.

So my second point was that I don't believe the opposite to be true, that a girl would change her mind about a guy once he explained to her that he was attracted to her physically. I presented what I believed to be the two most likely scenarios in that situation. I will admit there might be outliers.

As for guys "just wanting sex" which is the usual complaint, I can recall two situations in which a female propositioned me for just this reason, in fact I learned later that one of them didn't even especially like me. But I cooperated without giving it a second thought. So males and females are definitely different in that regard.


I never claimed women couldn't also be like that they can.

And actually I have experienced the original scenario so women do have similar reactions.



Outrider
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12 Jun 2016, 8:05 am

I think he means something else.

I have heard from many women they may become attracted to a male friend they might not have been physically attracted to at first once discovering his personality.

But Max is not talking about that.

He's actually saying once a male finds out a female friend is interested in him, he will become attracted to her and yes this is almost always true for me as well.

As long as a male does not find his female friend unattractive, his neutral/apathy towards her will quickly turn into a mutual attraction if he realizes she is attracted to him.

Meanwhile it seems women who are friends with a male almost always see it as strictly platonic and nothing more.

I strongly believe a single male tends to fall for his single female friend easier and faster than a woman who is single will fall for her male friend - very rare occurance and if it does happen it will only happen after several years of the friendship while a male might fall for a female friend within just a few months.



CockneyRebel
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12 Jun 2016, 8:19 am

I'm glad I don't live in Southern California.


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Cafeaulait
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12 Jun 2016, 8:45 am

I would say 50% nurture and 50% nature.

Obviously, you can't change bone structure, it's what you are born with. Disregarding plastic surgery. Bone structure is a very big factor in physical attractiveness, and certainly facially.

But all the rest, weight, skin, hair, clothing, scent -can easily be altered.

A Born 4 will never be a 9 though, because in order to be a 9 one needs good bone structure as well.



Alliekit
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12 Jun 2016, 9:08 am

Outrider wrote:
I think he means something else.

I have heard from many women they may become attracted to a male friend they might not have been physically attracted to at first once discovering his personality.

But Max is not talking about that.

He's actually saying once a male finds out a female friend is interested in him, he will become attracted to her and yes this is almost always true for me as well.

As long as a male does not find his female friend unattractive, his neutral/apathy towards her will quickly turn into a mutual attraction if he realizes she is attracted to him.

Meanwhile it seems women who are friends with a male almost always see it as strictly platonic and nothing more.

I strongly believe a single male tends to fall for his single female friend easier and faster than a woman who is single will fall for her male friend - very rare occurance and if it does happen it will only happen after several years of the friendship while a male might fall for a female friend within just a few months.


Ah I see what you mean. But I have to say if I find out someone is interested in me (a rare occurance) I am often more receptive to their advances.



Sangsang
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12 Jun 2016, 10:44 am

MaxE wrote:
Alliekit wrote:
(what's been said so far)
Please let me restate my original comment. So a guy meets a girl whom he does not find especially attractive, but then she makes evident to him the fact that he is physically attractive to her. I mean strictly in the physical sense. After which, his whole attitude towards her changes, and he wants to be with her as much as he can. I know this can happen because it happened to me. I don't think it would happen to a guy who has never had much problem finding female companionship.

So my second point was that I don't believe the opposite to be true, that a girl would change her mind about a guy once he explained to her that he was attracted to her physically. I presented what I believed to be the two most likely scenarios in that situation. I will admit there might be outliers.

As for guys "just wanting sex" which is the usual complaint, I can recall two situations in which a female propositioned me for just this reason, in fact I learned later that one of them didn't even especially like me. But I cooperated without giving it a second thought. So males and females are definitely different in that regard.


Disagree completely. Most of my boyfriends have been guys I was friendly or friends with for years then *boom* something clicks and we start dating.



kraftiekortie
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13 Jun 2016, 5:32 am

I've thought that people with varying born structures have all been "9's."

I think one can be much more attractive, usually, if they are not constantly frowning.



Outrider
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13 Jun 2016, 5:45 am

Sangsang wrote:
MaxE wrote:
Alliekit wrote:
(what's been said so far)
Please let me restate my original comment. So a guy meets a girl whom he does not find especially attractive, but then she makes evident to him the fact that he is physically attractive to her. I mean strictly in the physical sense. After which, his whole attitude towards her changes, and he wants to be with her as much as he can. I know this can happen because it happened to me. I don't think it would happen to a guy who has never had much problem finding female companionship.

So my second point was that I don't believe the opposite to be true, that a girl would change her mind about a guy once he explained to her that he was attracted to her physically. I presented what I believed to be the two most likely scenarios in that situation. I will admit there might be outliers.

As for guys "just wanting sex" which is the usual complaint, I can recall two situations in which a female propositioned me for just this reason, in fact I learned later that one of them didn't even especially like me. But I cooperated without giving it a second thought. So males and females are definitely different in that regard.


Disagree completely. Most of my boyfriends have been guys I was friendly or friends with for years then *boom* something clicks and we start dating.


That's just it.

A male could fall for a female friend within months but he'll end up in the pain of unrequited love as it seems to take a female at least a few years or so of friendship before they may or may not develop an attraction to him.

For some males they are self-aware enough to know they can never truly be single and friends with a female without eventually developing feelings (this is me).

Even if I go into a friendship knowing I only see her as a friend I know only time will tell before I develop feelings and are hurt once again.

I'm not talking about men either who befriend a woman when they are interested in her romantically, I'm saying men who befriend women and only see the woman as a friend may develop feelings more quickly and more powerfully than she will.



Sangsang
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13 Jun 2016, 1:02 pm

Cafeaulait wrote:
I would say 50% nurture and 50% nature.

Obviously, you can't change bone structure, it's what you are born with. Disregarding plastic surgery. Bone structure is a very big factor in physical attractiveness, and certainly facially.

But all the rest, weight, skin, hair, clothing, scent -can easily be altered.

A Born 4 will never be a 9 though, because in order to be a 9 one needs good bone structure as well.


A sharp, funny, successful, educated 4 who dresses to flatter shape is likely to be considered way more attractive 30 than a 9 with nothing but a string of menial jobs as a work history -- for both men and women.