Relatives trying to pair you up

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It's the fact that she "got angry" at her mom for proposing that she checks these guys out. It's quite an excessive reaction and it really indicates a snobby and judgy attitude, not because she would like to date someone more independent but because of her reaction. She actually gets offended by the fact that her mom thinks she could see these guys. She takes it as an offense!
It's especially insensitive considering that she posted it here, where many people have trouble being independent and stuff.

I seriously don't get this thing of people being paired up forever and then all the good guys and women are gone. Hardly anybody stays together for a lifetime!!

Women are not required to take an interest in anyone just because they're both single.

I don't understand why men don't get this.

Men would never consider dating someone they were not physically attracted to (and there's plenty of evidence of this on this forum) - why on earth should it be any different for women?

And yeah, I can see why she would be angry at her mom. For one thing, it's not her mom's business, but parents can't help but always want to interfere in their adult children's lives. So there's that.

This could be compared to the dateless single guy being offered a date with a 400 pound woman with no teeth and bad body odor.

Or the family suggesting to the dateless straight guy who struggles with women that "it's okay if you're gay - we would understand."

The unspoken message here is this: - "This guy/girl is a loser and so are you, so why don't you get together?" No one wants to hear that because it's throwing salt on an open wound.

NOTE, I'm not saying anyone is a loser - I'm saying this is what the message sounds like when it's heard, and hence the angry reaction.

Don't give me the crappy "you are not entitled to womyn!!!1!!1" talk, it is obvious that I was talking about something else. Did you even read what I wrote?

Perhaps there is no unspoken message, you know?
And I can't conceive in a million years getting angry at someone because they suggest you might try to see some person. it is such a snobby and exaggerated behaviour.
Of course if some person has a history of attemps to pair you up with people that is annoying and is a different topic.

There's always an unspoken message.

"Don't give me the crappy "you are not entitled to womyn!!!1!!1" talk, it is obvious that I was talking about something else. Did you even read what I wrote?

Perhaps there is no unspoken message, you know?
And I can't conceive in a million years getting angry at someone because they suggest you might try to see some person. it is such a snobby and exaggerated behaviour.
Of course if some person has a history of attemps to pair you up with people that is annoying and is a different topic."

And perhaps there IS an unspoken message, or at least it's the one she hears in her own head.

I just explained why someone would feel that way. It's because they feel like they're trying their best to find an appropriate partner, someone they want to be involved with, but they feel like they keep coming up short, and they feel bad about themselves.

And here comes mom (or some other family member) and suggests they see someone who is completely and absolutely inappropriate, simply based on the fact that they're both single. It's basically an insult and it hurts.

Agreed.

Heh, but actually figuring out the unspoken message, that's another thing entirely. The way I'd read it if my relatives were constantly making recommendations on people to date would be "stop being a complete git and just get a girlfriend already".

EXACTLY!!

Maybe her mom sees something in them that she doesn't see? Maybe her mom finds them attractive? Who the hell knows?

Perhaps it'd be better to just decline and not to react as if her mother suggested some filthy scum, but hey react however you want to, I don't care.
I sorta found a girl so thank God I don't have to deal with this nutty s**t anymore.

Yeah Sherlock, I guess an Asperger's internet community of people who don't know her mother at all is the best place to find out if there is an unspoken message and what it is.

Oh no. You can't just say there is no unspoken message then get all sarcastic on me when I say there is. Not going to accept that.

Yes I can.

Well, friends too.

Its annoying. They see 4 singles (2F 2M) at a table, they try to match up by beauty like "oh Kris, why you're single? Do you want a girlfriend" (signing with their heads to the girl)

I think its normal at same time. They forgot or they just think its easy.

If you want to talk about unspoken messages you ask an NT. That would be me. If you're autistic you can be forgiven for not recognizing when you're basically being insulted.

Let's just have an org- oops I mean a group hug.