suicide

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Yep, I know now that most of that was just depression telling me lies. I just thought I’d mention that it’s not always about how much pain, misery, suffering, etc. someone is in (though it probably still was a factor even for me, just not the primary reason), but about what effect someone believes they have on other people. This is why I get ticked off when people say that suicide is always a selfish and thoughtless act, because for me (and probably a significant number of other people too), it was the opposite.

my former aspie meetup group had for a while, a member who had tried to blow his brains out with a shotgun, but he slipped and blew off much of his central face instead. very lucky he didn't take out his eyes. but he definitely was maimed. fear of that kind of failure, of making it worse instead of ending the pain, and furthermore of knowing what one used to be before the mishap, is a definite deterrent.

Hugs

You express yourself wonderfully just like Whaale Tune.


Lota of 'normal' ppl have a hard time believing that thought process isnt an act since they are incapable of it ..

They always think there is a hidden motive and may even falsify n degrade your character to satisfy their need for a 'hidden motive'/'two facedness'/'compulsive lying' to be the explanation.. Will jump onto anything to support it... Which is twisted.
.
But i learned that what I wd think is selfishness is actually not--

they call it that because it comes naturally to them and so adding too much on top becomes imbalanced..


For someone like you, seeming self-effacement and compassion is already present and the balance comes from developing a healthy ego and being 'selfish'...or being less caring..
But really that decrease in caring outwardly is turned onto yourself..

This Might be wrong but that is what I think right now...