I shot my shot

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I doubt it. I suppose asking this question in a forum full of Aspies is a bit of "blind leading the blind" and everything.

Yes, this is very much mixed signals. Sending someone your availability schedule is... pragmatic but slightly distant. Nothing he wrote seemed to indicate that he understood my interest, even though I felt like my message "I want to do something one-on-one, like grab dinner or something" along with all of my signals in the past should send him the signal loud and clear.

Miss. Whale...

Any guy with a normal or high IQ would realize that being asked by a woman for a 'hanging out' 1-to-1 = romantic interest.

It's not something that happens frequently in a guy's life; most of us are so aware that women usually don't ask a guy alone for hanging out (not in a group outing) due to platonic interest; it is a very strong indication of romantic interest.

Your actions scream "I LIKE YOU" rubbing it on his face.

Otherwise he's doormat as f--.

Then what am I to make of his response?

I still thinks he likes you.

I’m not an Aspie. I’m a classic autist.

Personally, haven had experience with people who are of a certain faith.

I would read him inviting you to his religious party, as saying, "i like you but I am Jewish, and we don't show interest in people outside of our faith, due to the complications it makes", and "I have invited you to my religious party, to see how you get on, and see how the rest of the crew see what your like",

and if you are really keen on him, then you may take religious conversion as a possible choice.
and then, you can hang out, perhaps with long term prospects.

He wouldn't be able to put the above in words, as it may make you either judge his religion, or worse still,
superficially convert to be Jewish so that you can hang out with him but not really convert in your heart,
which could lead your buddy to sin or in the religious folks perception, one of their flock breaking away from their congregation. Which to some religious folk is perceived the same as death.

I have been through a similar circumstance myself, and was the most psychologically traumatising experiences of my life. Worse that getting involved with hard drugs, you name it. Being caught in conflict with a partner who you love who is torn between you and their religion can cause nervous breakdowns and a great deal of stress from all corners.

Not something that I recommend.

I can not speak for the guy however, so perhaps it would be an idea to ask the guy,
although getting a straight answer out of religious folk can be difficult, due to the complex nature as stated above.

If the guy is seriously into his religion and it is not a religion that you can take to.
Then I recommend, as harsh as it sounds, to look else where.
As there are loads of potential partners in this world who don't have complex circumstances.

That is my advice on the topic.

If converting to Judaism is something that you would do, then, go for it. Explain to him how you feel and
be done with it. I wish you good luck!

One can’t easily covert to a Jew, I guess - it is not a missionary faith.

FWIW, as an adult with responsibilities, obligations and a job, I would assume that sending one's schedule was a step towards hanging out together.

Most people who don't want to hang out will make up some soft generic excuses like "I'm busy lately" or "my schedule is very full right now"

If you hear these sorts of excuses without any alternative arrangement suggestions, it is usually a rejection.

His reply does not sound like an outright rejection to me.

Like others have said, it could be that he is shy, on the spectrum himself, socially awkward, needs to get to know you better before he sends any signal indicating serious interest, he could be overly cautious, he could be scared/nervous of you (like young crushes usually are), or he could just be oblivious (like your brother said)..... the only way to find out to peruse it and see what happens

what does Judaism say about sex before marriage

jewish views on premarital sex

I am not implying things here, but the link above may help clarify your position here and also may explain why you have found it difficult to start a relationship here.

I speak not as a person who was involved with a Jewish girl (although i have no problem with Jewish people per se).
I do speak as a person who unfortunately got involved with a girl who was a Jehovah Witness.

In my experience, if the person is highly religious, is influenced by others who are highly religious, or who belongs to a religion that forbids premarital sex and requires for a person to completely convert to their religion for you to be able to hang out with them, then, in my experience, unless you feel particularly and genuinely drawn to the religion.

I would steer clear of this relationship, unless, the guy, through completely his own wishes, chooses to drop out of his religion and choose you to hang out with.

Otherwise, you will likely go through hell. Even if the guy wants to be with you, you will likely have to have a secret relationship, which sucks. and then will also likely get into conflicts with family and friends.

also, you may end up being forced to live a life that is completely alien to you. as religious folk can have some really bizarre views of things that normal regular people think are normal.

Ex-wife + Jehovah Witness forbid the following:

Drinking more than 2 units of alcohol in one 24 hour period
Drinking to get drunk (i love getting drunk!)
Going to night clubs / bars (I love going to night clubs and bars)
No drugs (i have gone past this, but hey, i always like the option open!...lol)
being cheeky (I love being cheeky)
wearing normal clothes (seen the JW's in their suits... imagine having to spend the entire week in suits, even after you come home from work).
Computer Games banned
Films over 12+ rating
Books with unsuitable content
No martial Arts (i love martial arts)
No making music apart from every now and then (I love music more than anything)
no swear (well you know what i say to that.... those F@#kers!! ! can f@#k right off!... I don't swear that much, but always like the option open. after leaving their control i would say i swear more due to being repressed.
Boring in bed!
No porn!

and that's the list without even including going to all the meetings which for a JW includes meetings almost every day of the week...

Yep... as the old saying goes. always read the small print before signing!

There are easier relationships in the world, and if you asked me as to whether the relationship was worth all the stress I went through, I would say in capital letters A BIG FAT NO!! !!

Please love, save yourself a lot of unhappiness.... before it is too late and your head over heals
as it is when you are head over heals that you lose sight of the facts and reality...

I say this out of completely compassionate kindness to you and your buddy.
Sometimes it is wise to see the pitfalls before you end up falling down them

I wish someone had told me in time before i ended up going through hell
seriously even if the guy is keen

please exercise some wisdom here
your a beautiful young and intelligent woman
you have a lot of guys to choose from
don't make your own life hard without good reason

there are more fish in the sea!
and your Jewish buddy will likely meet a Jewish girl at some point and that will be him sorted too.

I hope what i have written helps
peace be with you

He sounds introverted, maybe a bit geeky, and possibly Aspie to me. I can understand a range of responses but providing an availability schedule isn't normally one of them. But for someone who'd consider that as a valid course of action, it might actually be quite a bold step.

Although some guys are just a bit clueless, normally accidentally but sometimes deliberately. [Some men are wary of female indirectness, viewing it as time-wasting or manipulation, whereas I think most women believe indirectness and subtlety are simple good manners].

Depending how far you want to push things, you could have some fun adding different events involving both of you, to his diary.

While I was getting dinner, he came up to me to get my attention and said hi, and apologized for everything, started asking about my weekend and everything. And then when I gave him a chance to exit the conversation he followed me to get dinner, and kept talking to me. So we talked about plans and everything. Like setting something up.

I still did not get the sense that he realized my intention, but maybe I am just dense. There was a lot more laughter from him, it actually bordered on seeming nervous at times, but he seemed very interested in talking to me. Like I said, he sought me out and all that. Big friendly vibes at the very least. Like... if he knew I was interested and was not interested himself, I feel like he would have not been so eager to speak to me for like half an hour while we were getting dinner.

I did not get flirtatious vibes, but to be fair, we were in the middle of a public campus sidewalk in the freezing cold, with face masks on. So, I don't know what flirtatious vibes would have looked like in that context.

I remain confused but slightly more uplifted?

P.S. Lots of projection in the Jehovah's Witness post.

Not everyone is the same, different people follow different faiths in different ways. Most are sensible enough to disassociate religious belief from personal control freakery.

Find out over time what he is like as an individual, what he believes in (from a broader perspective), and what his priorities are. Rather than listening to blanket presumptions.

P.P.S. Ok, so that sounds like good progress. It would be worth asking your brother for some history on this guy's previous relationships. Maybe he has just realised what is going on, but he's being cautious for a reason?

You got out there and you tried. You did what you needed to do. You're a very strong person. You should be proud of yourself.

How is his schedule looking for the 14th February?