If you could make the rules, what would they be?

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Now this question I can answer without having any concerns about the question

I would like a world with aLOT more gender equality where gender roles & expectations are a lot more mild or don't really exist. Also people would find things attractive that are outside of the typical gender roles. A woman could be very attractive if she pays very little attention to her appearance if she's a good person. It's what's on the inside that counts. It's OK for women to make the 1st move. It's perfectly fine if women earn a lot more money than their guy. It's OK for guys to be financially dependent like disabled & on disability. Guys can be appreciated & respected for being house-husbands. If a guy is not really obsessed with wanting sex & does not conform to a stereotypical guy, he would NOT be an assumed closeted homosexual & women would still find him attractive if he's nice towards them. Guys can be attractive for being very affectionate & emotionally supportive. This stuff is a major reason I used to feel I was born the wrong gender & I've considered having a gay relationship since gay guys were the only ones interested in me.

I want a world like the American Hi-Fi song, The Geeks Get The Girls
Last night he finally got it right
Even losers can get lucky sometimes
All the freaks go on a winning streak
Shout it all around the world 'cause the geeks get the girls

Last edited by nick007 on 12 Feb 2022, 8:49 am, edited 5 times in total.

^^^that really deserves a LIKE button

I too would like to live in a Utopia.

mee three.

Ideally this is the kind of world I would like also.

I have a few ideas.

The dating game today is currently focused on luck, usually referring to people "getting lucky" or "waiting for the right one". In fact, those who are serious are often called "desperate" or "needy".

I would like a world where the opposite is the case, even though I personally am not interested in a romantical relationship. I think dating should be similar to a job interview the way it is structured, just seems the most logical.

"The one who requests a date pays for it."

I know exactly how this works by now but it is so different from the mainstream Western culture that it will be impossible to create as a subculture. In fact, it's not anything like a culture, rather more like 'my tribe' were everybody have strong bonds.

Courtship: The way autistic courtship works is pretty simple. You just keep close to each other for at least half an hour, and during that time you should not talk or think about NT dating. Rather, you should concentrate on building a connection. This will create a crush that can last a long time.

Seeing each other: To be able to see each other regularly without plannning "dates", it's essential to discover how to peek each other for position. Once you have discovered how this works, it will work with everybody you have a strong connection too. Ideally, learning this should be part of upbringing since it is essential. Perhaps of help is to try water-well dowsing since these are similar.

Creating good feelings: NTs typically use various verbal means and presents for this, but the autistic way is much simpler. You can peek each other with happy feelings. This, too, is essential and should be learnt as part of upbringing.

Communicating: You can use your inner dialog (talking to yourself) to transmit thoughts. That's also why we use "we" instead of "I" when talking to ourself. I don't think this needs any training, rather is automatic.

Sex: A lot of autistics identify as asexual, but this is likely because sexual intercourse is not how sex is supposed to be done. Rather, you do this with mind-to-mind communication too, and it is actually a lot more enjoyable.

What a subculture could do is to provide a suitable environment for connecting, but beyond that, I doubt it has much uses. Autistic tribes are built up with strongly connected people which at the center has a couple and then possibly have hang-arounds too. The hang-around position could be useful to learn the basics. NT subcultures, OTOH, typically are composed of strangers or at least people without strong bonds. That's not a environment compatible with an autistic tribe.

I had an interesting idea about this the other day.

I think it would be helpful if we could develop a cultural custom of wearing a subtle piece of jewellery to signify that one is single and looking, similar to how people wear wedding rings to signify that they're married. That way, those of us who need to do the approaching can more easily discern who is available and who isn't, and people might be more likely to set those of us up who are seen wearing that piece of jewellery for a long time.

I never dated, but as far as I know since there are no rules, you are allowed to conduct it as job interview.
There are cultures where this is the case.
I don't think people want relationship with boss figure though.

For my perspective some facts up front would make sense.
For starters it would be easier if people actually made it clear if they are available or not.
Secondly it should be made clear what the goal of relationship is.
Sex, romance, both, family, companionship, platonic relationship etc.
Obviously people are organic and as they learn about each other they can change their preferences.
But for most part I have no clue what people want or how things happen.
For most part it feels pretty random.

I would make it mandatory for everyone to have three spouses. All children would potentially have six parents. No one would be typically childless and no one would be typically parentless.

Hmm, the path is a little more complicated than I thought especially if you add in step parents.

I would force EVERYONE to find true love, date and get married because I believe we all need love in our lives!

Also everyone has to leave home at 18 and become independant to avoid situations like mine where I got stuck being my mom's caregiver since I didn't move out when I had the chance

Last edited by Mikurotoro92 on 08 Feb 2023, 8:49 pm, edited 1 time in total.

So people who don't have money can't date?

I prefer no-expense dates.

That would be my rule.

It weeds out all the pretence.

If you could make the rules, what would they be?

I make the rules as need be.

Take turns driving.

Just because you have a penis doesn’t mean that I want you to drive me everywhere.