Board index › Coping in life › Love and Dating

My heart feels weird......

Page 3 of 3 [ 41 posts ]  Go to page Previous  1, 2, 3

Previous topic | Next topic

calandale
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Mar 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,439

09 Aug 2007, 3:36 pm

Sedaka wrote:

i do need people... but my level of coping is just diff... it takes me years to forge even 1/2 way decent friendships

just as i made a few in highschool... i was gone

undergrad the same...

never really made any in grad school...

i need a good 4-5 yrs to make people's friend lists apparently.

and im about to start all over again


It's funny. I lucked out so well as
an undergrad. And just kept connections
rolling in. I thought 'twould just happen
again - part of the reason I went to school.

Turns out, it was luck alone.



techstepgenr8tion
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Feb 2005
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 24,490
Location: 28th Path of Tzaddi

09 Aug 2007, 5:08 pm

Sedaka wrote:
there's plenty of fruit on all levels within my reach...... just not that shiny red apple i want

bah circles and circles pacing round and round


That's an extistential struggle that I think we and definitely most NT's even suffer from. The funny thing about what Calendale said, joke or not I'm finding that liquor is one of the few things that does work - liquor and good friends of course to keep my mind on the current rather than the big picture.

You might need a cathartic outlet too, like creating something - music, art, poetry, something that doesn't feel lame to you but a medium that you think you could summon it out with and as well have something to share with people that's moving enough to really inspire (that tends to be my goal but then again I'm still lead around by the sounds that I can create more than what I literally have in my head - it takes a long time but I can't imagine the payoff not being immaculately beautiful in the sense of inward health).



Sedaka
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jul 2006
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,597
Location: In the recesses of my mind

09 Aug 2007, 8:37 pm

techstepgenr8tion wrote:
Sedaka wrote:
there's plenty of fruit on all levels within my reach...... just not that shiny red apple i want

bah circles and circles pacing round and round


That's an extistential struggle that I think we and definitely most NT's even suffer from. The funny thing about what Calendale said, joke or not I'm finding that liquor is one of the few things that does work - liquor and good friends of course to keep my mind on the current rather than the big picture.

You might need a cathartic outlet too, like creating something - music, art, poetry, something that doesn't feel lame to you but a medium that you think you could summon it out with and as well have something to share with people that's moving enough to really inspire (that tends to be my goal but then again I'm still lead around by the sounds that I can create more than what I literally have in my head - it takes a long time but I can't imagine the payoff not being immaculately beautiful in the sense of inward health).


once i get a relyable pc.... ill be back on WoW lol


_________________
Neuroscience PhD student

got free science papers?

www.pubmed.gov
www.sciencedirect.com
http://highwire.stanford.edu/lists/freeart.dtl


Ragtime
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Nov 2006
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,927
Location: Dallas, Texas

10 Aug 2007, 10:13 am

Phasianoraptor_hirvisaloi wrote:
The pulses get slower in depression. That's my own discovery. I've been depressed enough to wish my heart to stop altogether.


I've been there... wishing my heart would stop, and waiting for it to..... It just kept on going anyway. And I've had several good times since. :)


_________________
Christianity is different than Judaism only in people's minds -- not in the Bible.


Ragtime
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Nov 2006
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,927
Location: Dallas, Texas

10 Aug 2007, 11:14 am

Sedaka wrote:
jfberge wrote:
Sedaka wrote:
you know how sometimes when you're hungry and you dont want to eat ANYTHING that you have at the house (or could order-out or w/e)?

that's how my heart feels... not about food... but about love.

Im so stymied... i cant work or relax.


That very neatly describes my last several months. My wife left me about a year ago, and lately I've been half-heartedly looking for a girlfriend. There are plenty of available girls in town, but none that I can relate to, and want to get closer to. At best, I'd like to make out with one or two, but nothing more. I don't want to entangle my life with these people. I just want to find one that I can feel comfortable lounging around and hanging out with.

On a plainly physical level, you've got to draw a steady stream of attention. What's keeping you from eating some of that low-hanging fruit? Is what you're seeking not available, or are you not looking very rigorously?


there's plenty of fruit on all levels within my reach...... just not that shiny red apple i want

bah circles and circles pacing round and round


Sour grapes are always available. :wink:


_________________
Christianity is different than Judaism only in people's minds -- not in the Bible.


Sedaka
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 16 Jul 2006
Age: 42
Gender: Female
Posts: 4,597
Location: In the recesses of my mind

10 Aug 2007, 12:35 pm

Ragtime wrote:
Sedaka wrote:
jfberge wrote:
Sedaka wrote:
you know how sometimes when you're hungry and you dont want to eat ANYTHING that you have at the house (or could order-out or w/e)?

that's how my heart feels... not about food... but about love.

Im so stymied... i cant work or relax.


That very neatly describes my last several months. My wife left me about a year ago, and lately I've been half-heartedly looking for a girlfriend. There are plenty of available girls in town, but none that I can relate to, and want to get closer to. At best, I'd like to make out with one or two, but nothing more. I don't want to entangle my life with these people. I just want to find one that I can feel comfortable lounging around and hanging out with.

On a plainly physical level, you've got to draw a steady stream of attention. What's keeping you from eating some of that low-hanging fruit? Is what you're seeking not available, or are you not looking very rigorously?


there's plenty of fruit on all levels within my reach...... just not that shiny red apple i want

bah circles and circles pacing round and round


Sour grapes are always available. :wink:


id rather turn them into wine


_________________
Neuroscience PhD student

got free science papers?

www.pubmed.gov
www.sciencedirect.com
http://highwire.stanford.edu/lists/freeart.dtl


Ragtime
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Nov 2006
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,927
Location: Dallas, Texas

10 Aug 2007, 1:00 pm

Sedaka wrote:
Ragtime wrote:
Sedaka wrote:
jfberge wrote:
Sedaka wrote:
you know how sometimes when you're hungry and you dont want to eat ANYTHING that you have at the house (or could order-out or w/e)?

that's how my heart feels... not about food... but about love.

Im so stymied... i cant work or relax.


That very neatly describes my last several months. My wife left me about a year ago, and lately I've been half-heartedly looking for a girlfriend. There are plenty of available girls in town, but none that I can relate to, and want to get closer to. At best, I'd like to make out with one or two, but nothing more. I don't want to entangle my life with these people. I just want to find one that I can feel comfortable lounging around and hanging out with.

On a plainly physical level, you've got to draw a steady stream of attention. What's keeping you from eating some of that low-hanging fruit? Is what you're seeking not available, or are you not looking very rigorously?


there's plenty of fruit on all levels within my reach...... just not that shiny red apple i want

bah circles and circles pacing round and round


Sour grapes are always available. :wink:


id rather turn them into wine


That can help too.


_________________
Christianity is different than Judaism only in people's minds -- not in the Bible.


calandale
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 9 Mar 2007
Gender: Male
Posts: 12,439

10 Aug 2007, 2:26 pm

no wining.



Ragtime
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 2 Nov 2006
Age: 45
Gender: Male
Posts: 7,927
Location: Dallas, Texas

10 Aug 2007, 4:15 pm

calandale wrote:
no wining.


...or dining, and especially -- ....


_________________
Christianity is different than Judaism only in people's minds -- not in the Bible.