juliekitty wrote:
shadexiii wrote:
If you don't want your tattoo to be permanent, you get a temporary one. If you're stressing over the cost (financial and otherwise) of getting at tattoo removed, then you don't want it to be permanent in the first place, or at the very least you aren't ready for it.
Good analogy!
That is what I used to think too. When I married my wife, I said that I wanted us to get tattoos that were special to us, I designed the tattoo which we both loved. I said that if we weren't ready to have a tattoo then we weren't ready to get married, that I believed in the vows of marriage and should uphold them.
We didn't end up getting the tattoo's due to procrastination, time, money etc
However, now, my marriage is on the verge of collapse, and I am glad I didn't get the tattoo, because i feel very different now (as my wife does too) to how we felt when we got married. You feel like now is forever when you get married, that you are ontop of the world, there's noone else, and you want to spend the rest of your lives together. Then when it gets to a point, all you want to do is be by yourself.
Before I met my wife, i never believed in marriage, I said that whats the point when you can break up just as easily, that people who are married are as in love as people who are not married, that marriage is an institution that isn't relevant anymore. Then I met my wife and everything changed, I didn't want to be with anyone else, I wanted to declare from the heavens that she was my wife and my life partner to the exclusion of all others.
But now, it seems as easy to leave a marriage than if we were going out, or just de-facto, that when things get bad enough for long enough, you walk away.
And now I don't think I believe in marriage anymore again, if we don't work it out, then I don't want to marry someone ever again, I don't want to go through this again and have words like family thrown in my face.
When I brought up Asperger Syndrome, my wife wanted to leave me because she saw it as me being unhappy in our marriage, and that I was looking for a way out of our marriage, she then chose to attack me over AS, and try and disprove I had AS, and when I would explain why I think I have it, she would attack and attack and attack.
A marriage is supposed to be understanding, loving and accepting no matter what.
Marriage seems like bullsh*t to me at the moment, an excuse. A reason for people to eat their cake and have it too, that they can do whatever they want and they "have" to stay together, that they "have" to have sex regularly even if they aren't attracted to each other anymore, and they "have" to stay together, when the truth of the matter is that if they weren't married they would have left each other long ago and probably been happier for it.
I don't know, sorry for the negative vibe.
17 Mar 2008, 3:02 pm
