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Friendzone

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Chronos
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14 Jul 2016, 10:15 pm

Spiderpig wrote:
So it has to be always a masquerade? Can't they ever be friends for real?


They can be friends for real if the person who was rejected can turn off his or her attraction and be absolutely fine with just being friends, but what tends to happen is the person maintains their unrequited feelings, and grows resentful of the rejection and feels like they are being used, because the person who rejected them is treating them as they would a friend, and the person who was rejected wants to be the boyfriend or girlfriend, and not the friend friend.



hurtloam
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15 Jul 2016, 6:03 pm

Yeah you're right. The friendship can only work if there is no resentment.



The_Face_of_Boo
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24 Jan 2017, 8:23 am

And here is the 1994's ultimate FRIENDZONE song :lol:
(enable English subtitles, if not enabled already click on the small CC at bottom, and the setting icon to choose language):



The_Face_of_Boo
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24 Jan 2017, 9:40 am

Chronos wrote:
Spiderpig wrote:
So it has to be always a masquerade? Can't they ever be friends for real?


They can be friends for real if the person who was rejected can turn off his or her attraction


Yeah, because humans are equipped with an ON/OFF switch for that. It's so easy peasy.

Switch On: I am in love with this person.

Switch Off: I am no longer in love with this person.

/sarcasm.



RetroGamer87
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24 Jan 2017, 4:00 pm

Image


_________________
The days are long, but the years are short


The_Face_of_Boo
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25 Jan 2017, 4:21 am

^ I am a necromancer!
But really, when this song was out I didn't understand what was it about, I was 12.

When I heard it yesterday I was like s**t, that's Friendzone level 99! and reminded me of the friendzone threads here.



Aaendi
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30 Jan 2017, 1:11 pm

Chronos wrote:
If you are in the friendzone, it's your fault. You are either masquerading as her friend because you are too afraid of asking her out and being rejected, or you are masquerading as her friend as a way to remain close to her after she rejected you. Either way, you are being deceitful and not taking responsibility for yourself. If she is not romantically interested in you, don't pretend you are her best friend. Be civil, but move on and try dating other people. Maybe you will find someone you are a better match with. Maybe you two will cross paths later in life and will be more compatible with each other and be something more than friends. Who knows.


In other words, guys have only two options:

-you're a misogynist for being her friend
-you're a misogynist for not being her friend

Clearly it's the man's fault for not picking the correct option, and not because there isn't a correct option to pick.



The_Face_of_Boo
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30 Jan 2017, 5:51 pm

^^ It's so weird that there are so many women , who don't simply understand that some men simply develop feelings toward a female with time. So it's not like he started the friendship with ulterior motives.

How hard is that to understand?

For instance, in the lyrics of the song I posted:

"One of my biggest aspiration is to walk with you (daily) for hours and hours" (with her friend...)

I mean why it is so surprising for one to develop feelings toward someone who walks with you for hours and hours :lol:?

The song is actually a poem written by a female poet, and she was addressing her friend in, so the story behind it is real.


"
Majida el-Roumi - Be My Friend

How wonderful it would be if we remained friends
For every woman needs the palm of a friend

Be my freind, be my friend, be my friend
Be my friend, ah my friend, ah ah be my friend


My stories are short and my concerns are small
My stories are short and my concerns are small
And my aspiration is to walk for hours with you
My stories are short and my concerns are small
My stories are short and my concerns are small
And my aspiration is to walk for hours with you
In the rain
When sadness silences me ah ah
When sadness silences me and anxiety makes me cry
Why do you care about how I look and ignore my mind?
Why do you care about how I look and ignore my mind?
My mind

I really need a safe harbor
I really need a safe harbor
And I'm exhausted, exhausted from love stories and news of passion
So speak, speak speak speak speak
Why do you forget half the words when you meet me
Why do you care about how I look and ignore my mind?
Why do you care about how I look and ignore my mind?
My mind

Be my friend, be my friend, be my friend
There's nothing emasculating about it
On the other hand, the man of the East is not satisfied with with any role
Except roles of heroism"