Slys dating site advice help thread.

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What the **** are you laughing about? You are the one who doens't understand ****.
Social norm my ass, just because an app has many filthy perverts it doesn't mean that it is ok and they can act like that all they want. Just because you are a homosexual it doesn't mean that all homosexual are ok with that, do you understand it?
The very fact that if someone reports you for it you get banned for inappropriate behaviour CLEARLY shows that I am right and all you say is nothing but absolute BS. The right thing to do is to always ask before sending such things to someone, because not everyone likes it and it can be sexual harassment.

No, they don't. They keep warning this on their profiles.

hale_bopp was correct in that my comment was directed at no one in particular. When I am addressing a specific person, I typically quote that person or at the very least make it clear to that person I am addressing them specifically. If anything, my comment was directed at individuals who's efforts to help those characterized by my comments would prove fruitless.

Concerning you:
On more than one occasion you have accused me of saying things I did not say, even when what I said was not directed to you. These things you think I said, and did not, are typically negative things that pertain to yourself and I find this concerning because I do not appreciate being misquoted, as it is a distortion of truth, and additionally, I believe these fabricated things you accuse me of saying are a reflection of your own self image, which is apparently very poor. So my question to you is, why do you see yourself in such a negative light that you automatically assume comments that you perceive as negative are speaking of you?

I agree with the others that you need to build a stronger sense of self worth, and to be honest with you, the internet is not the best place to do that. The internet, has, in fact, become very toxic and I do not believe it is a place to come to feel better about one's self. I think you probably need some real life counseling from a psychologist or licensed therapist if you don't have such already, and to spend more of your time offline doing things that build your self esteem as a person. A great way to do that is to help others. For example, volunteer to build houses with Habitat for Humanity, or similar organizations.

I don't often agree with sly, but this time I understand why he thought like that.

When you say something like:



Then certainly sly and many others fit this underlined description, so it's normal that he would think he's targeted too. He is not fool nor ret*d to not see the hint and you can't now insult his intelligence by telling him "oh...but I didn't mean you" or something like "oh...it's all in your head, it's due to your low self esteem".

Probably you should specify more and name those people you think so lowly of. So instead of "about the endless stream of typically young guys who come in here to vent their frustrations with dating" you say "about user X , user Y and user Z".

I am no better, I often do such broad generalizations and make the ladies climb the wall, because I am villain and too lazy to specify and I recall you and few other ladies often criticized me for that.

But at least do what you preach for.

Of course what you say is your fault, just as people who use 'autistic' to insult someone they see as doing something stupid are responsible for what they say.

The ability to read and write is a bit pointless if you're not going to pause and think in between.

Well that sucks.

Given your interpretation of the structure of my comment, I can see how you thought I was generalizing but I was not. What you mistook for insults was the description of the specific demographic I was speaking of. I'm not very good with names but certainly any man who insists women have irrational standards and 20% of the men get all the women, or whatever silly statistic the OP of that thread claimed. SadAspie also comes to mind though I belive he has been banned for many years.

Is Sly among that demographic? I wouldn't know. I don't follow or read his posts to the extent that I would know and did not have him in mind when I wrote it, but I think probably not because in my experience, those guys are too delusioned to even think it might apply to them.

However I do believe one thing about him, and that is, he is in no condition to be on these forums right now because he is too upset and seems to be interpreting things as negatives and things he interprets as negatives as attacks against him personally and he is not reading straight.

See the second post on the page here

He had either confused me for someone else or thought I had said things I has not, and typically when people start doing that, they are too wound up and need to take a break.

Some people, when in a bad emotional state, will read threats in to things too easily. This is particularly easy to do through text when the person has no visual or inflection cues and arw more prone to superimpose their negative mindset on the words and give them their own meaning.

I'm sorry he is feeling so poorly about himself as I said, I think he needs to sign off and speak to an actual counselor, and as others said, work on building his self esteem.

^If this forum is only for people who are in the right frame of mind for positive social interaction, then none of us belong here

Many probably don't. Many would be better served focusing on productive offline endeavors and interacting with people in person. I do not think the internet has been a good thing for mental health. It causes people to spend too much time in their head and dwelling on their problems rather than out grow them.

My own comment reminded me of a very weird Saudi food commercial "Chicken's ambitions" that caused a lot of uproar from animal rights activists:

https://stepfeed.com/this-chicken-ad-wi ... l-day-3364

I thought I was following that ok considering I only understood a few words. But when it got to the kebab meat at the end, I didn't get the joke
It was a very long advert in comparison to ours.

The first link explains the advert in english.
Basically, this chicken girl’s ambition is to become “shawarma” (doner kebab) and she studied and trained hard to become one.... it’s a wtf commercial. As some commentors said, it’s a sick ad.

^Well of course I followed the wrong bit, I'm an Aspie

So the chicken girl actually was the kebab at the end, wow! that's really thinking outside of the box, particularly for a chicken.

^ and she made her parents so proud :’|

Agreed. Aren't support forums like this meant for people who have problems? Sure there might be some here that have so severe problems that they should be kept away from all internet forums in order to not cause harm to their own or someone else's minds (I'm not talking about anyone specific here), but I think most are the type that this forum has been made for in the first place.

Yes, it's meant for that & we all have a place here.

However, the issue with sly is that for the last ~5+ YEARS he's almost exclussively focused on his problems and has very, VERY, rarely posted a word about solutions. People offer him tons of advice & he shoots it down or ignores it or comes up with every excuse in the book not to try something, or he argues that the universal truths people post about - things agreed upon by countless authors, psychiatrists etc over centuries, not just forum posters, aren't in fact true & cannot be true for him blah blah so he refuses to learn anything from it and Try a damned thing to help himself move in a positive direction. It's almost as if he thrives on being miserable and doesn't want to be out of his suicidal depression, which is downright BIZARRE. I'm not an as*hole, I'm just calling it like I see it. Honestly, I would LOVE to see sly post and say he read some books, saw a counsellor, tried some therapy, changed his diet/exercise/sleep, or a variety of other methods to think & feel better. Hell, I've offered to buy him an extremely helpful book on the topic.

But instead, this is what I've come to expect more of the same of from sly:



I'd WAY rather read that he's Trying something new & getting different, better, more positive results. But he's so stubborn that he seems almost like he's afraid of what might happen if he's Not suicidally depressed. f**k do I ever wish he'd give a few things a shot and find out, though!

So, yeah, there ya go.. this IS a place for support, but what are we supposed to support? Are we supposed to support people keeping themselves f*****g miserable & suicidal? I'd rather encourage improvement towards solutions and a better balanced mental health and life.