If you're 27 and never had a girlfriend, is it too late?

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Less likely, maybe but it's not impossible for a young woman to miss out on dating. Actually in some ways it's harder for a girl. I know a lot of guys have complained about unwritten rule that the guy asks the girl out. I know that a lot of guys have thought if only it wasn't for this rule, girls would be asking them out, saving them from having to be nervous (as if girls can't get nervous as well). Now I agree this rule is a bad idea but not because I want to spare guys the trouble of asking girls out.

My reasoning is that this unwritten rule does more harm to girls than to guys. You might think this rule means that girls get asked out all the time. No, it means some girls get asked out all the time. Some girls get way more attention from guys than they get deal with. They get asked out way too often. Some girls make it into their twenties without having been asked out. Maybe they look less then perfect, maybe some other reason (if you think it's hard to get a date as a poor guy, try getting a date as a plain looking girl).

So for these girls, if they follow society's unwritten rule, they could be waiting around for years for a guy to ask them out. You get to ask out a girl any time you want. A girl might like one guy, not get asked out by him and then get asked by some different guy, and so end up going out with him instead of the guy she liked. You actually get to choose who you ask out.

Now arguably you could say there's more too it than that. If a girl wants a particular guy to ask him out, she can signal him non-verbally. Failure to respond could be taken by the girl as intentional refusal. Guys who can't get a date may've missed many such opportunities without ever noticing and girls who get into their twenties without being asked out, even pretty ones, maybe it's because they didn't flirt enough to the guys they liked. Maybe the guys had no way of knowing they were interested in them.

So maybe in a sense this rule doesn't even exist but you should know that not all girls have power over guys. Some girls don't, even if they're pretty. Some girls wait for a guy to ask them out and they have even less power than a guy who gets rejected.

Yes some girls don't get dates but you can't compare the numbers, I think, and some don't because they don't want to/are picky (there are guys like this too and I don't count them). Also a guy can hardly make girls ask him out, but a girl can just walk to a guy and ask him out if she wants. So the girl can be both asked out and ask someone out, whereas the boy only has the latter option.

However I don't think it is still like this, girls nowadays ask boys out too without a problem.

Not really. As you get older, the women you're getting are older too and college age girls don't like men in their thirties, so these 'best years' won't be spent with the girls he missed out on. OP will never have a cute girl. The most he can hope for is being a provider simp for a woman who didn't want him for anything else and didn't like him enough to give him her most attractive years, as evident by the fact that he's 27 and has never had a girlfriend.

It's easier for her than a man of equal attractiveness. That's what counts.


Both you and these guys are wrong. This 'rule' doesn't exist. Women are free to ask men out and they actually do so when they find a man attractive enough. The reason they don't ask men out as much is because they choose not to ask men out as much. The 'stigma' does not prevent you from doing anything.




Easy as f**k, and easily proven. Girls don't even need to look average, let alone 'perfect'.


Choosing who you ask out is irrelevant. You can't choose who says yes.

OK, now I'm sad. The OP will never have a cute 20 year old and neither will I. I'll never have a girl under 25. I'll spend thousands of dollars to provide for some thirtyager woman who gave her early 20s to some other guy for much less money. So life is all down hill after 25, right?

the girl still ultimately has the final say, she just has to accept or reject at the whim.

Yes and I commend you for such a quick turnaround. Never before have I seen a man change his view so quickly when confronted with logic that contradicts it. Maybe this forum is different or something.

OK, sorry to interrupt this thread here for myself- I am 28, and it's only now that I'm getting my feet wet on this. I have interest in this girl who is a friend o' a friend, and so far, we talk only sporadically...... I'm taking it slow, not rushing into things as I did in my early 20s. I'm just saying this time, "What happens, happens...."

Contrary to everything everyone has ever told you, it's not going to make a difference. Whatever happens will happen independent of the fact that that is your attitude.

so didn't start dating until you were 28?

^ I had one date when I was 20. Nothing else since.

so still no official girlfriend as of yet in your life? but you feel you are getting close to one?

Yes and yes.

I only lost my virginity last year (I'm 25 now) and have regretted it ever since. It must have been akin to reenacting an act of necrophilia for the poor girl.

it's the constant pain, depression of not having had a girlfriend earlier in my life will forever stick with me, even if I ever do get a girlfriend, the bitterness, resentment, pain, frustration over how it took so damn long to finally get one will still be inside of me, even if I ever do get a girlfriend, i'll probably be saying to her "i wish I met you 5, 10, or 20 years ago", depending on when if I ever get one.

^ I guess that makes two of us.