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If you're 27 and never had a girlfriend, is it too late?

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WantToHaveALife
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17 Jul 2015, 4:55 am

Peacesells wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
WantToHaveALife wrote:
it's the constant pain, depression of not having had a girlfriend earlier in my life will forever stick with me, even if I ever do get a girlfriend, the bitterness, resentment, pain, frustration over how it took so damn long to finally get one will still be inside of me, even if I ever do get a girlfriend, i'll probably be saying to her "i wish I met you 5, 10, or 20 years ago", depending on when if I ever get one.

She won't mind hearing that, as long as you don't follow it up with "because I wish I had a girlfriend all that time". People often say to their partners "I wish I met you earlier" but it usually means "because you are so awesome that I would like to have spent more time with you". The focus should be on finding the right person for you, not just finding a person. If you just want a girlfriend (whoever will have you), rather than wanting a partnership with someone you adore, it will often show, and be an unattractive trait. I don't have any words of wisdom about how to remove the bitterness and resentment but yes, it's important that you do. Perhaps start a new topic about how to do that and someone might have some useful advice?

Infact he has already pointed out that he just wants a girlfriend so that he can make experiences and he refuses to be serious with her. He also said that he doesn't wanna settle down with any until he has experienced a few of them.
But then he complains that woman are superficial. :roll:


I guess men and women are both superficial in their own ways



RetroGamer87
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17 Jul 2015, 6:23 am

No Escape wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
No Escape wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
WantToHaveALife wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
WantToHaveALife wrote:
I envy the power women have in their youth, people will say it's not a competition, but yet at the same time, people say life is a competition, so sounds hypocritical.
Which competition are you referring to? The competition between the sexes? The competition between rival women? Or the competition between men to be seen with the hottest girl?
well it's often argued, debated that womens peak attractiveness years start earlier than mens do
In that case don't envy them. Their power is short lived. Your power will last much longer. At 27 a girls looks have faded, her best years are behind her. Your power is increasing. Your best years are still to come.
Not really. As you get older, the women you're getting are older too and college age girls don't like men in their thirties, so these 'best years' won't be spent with the girls he missed out on. OP will never have a cute girl. The most he can hope for is being a provider simp for a woman who didn't want him for anything else and didn't like him enough to give him her most attractive years, as evident by the fact that he's 27 and has never had a girlfriend.
OK, now I'm sad. The OP will never have a cute 20 year old and neither will I. I'll never have a girl under 25. I'll spend thousands of dollars to provide for some thirtyager woman who gave her early 20s to some other guy for much less money. So life is all down hill after 25, right?
Yes and I commend you for such a quick turnaround. Never before have I seen a man change his view so quickly when confronted with logic that contradicts it. Maybe this forum is different or something.
And I was worried I'd look like some kind flim flam man for quickly changing my views just because some other guy said too. Maybe it's this attitude that makes people cling to their opinions like cold death even after they've been exposed to indisputable contrary evidence. Maybe we should abandon this cultural idea that it's virtuous for a man to have such integrity that he sticks to the same ideals long after they've been disproven.

OK, the truth is I change my views, opinion and general outlook on life several times per day. Mood swings. I felt pretty happy and energetic in the early afternoon but I wrote that last post in the late afternoon, on the train home from the worst office party I've ever been too (long story). Maybe that gave me a bleaker outlook. Maybe I wasn't wrong before or maybe I should count my blessings. I don't know. I have trouble gauging if I'm being too optimistic or too pessimistic.


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RetroGamer87
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17 Jul 2015, 6:31 am

WantToHaveALife wrote:
it's the constant pain, depression of not having had a girlfriend earlier in my life will forever stick with me, even if I ever do get a girlfriend, the bitterness, resentment, pain, frustration over how it took so damn long to finally get one will still be inside of me, even if I ever do get a girlfriend, i'll probably be saying to her "i wish I met you 5, 10, or 20 years ago", depending on when if I ever get one.
Ditto. Even when I was dating the that girl I still got mad everytime I saw two 20 year olds together because I can never do that while being 20. I have the same reaction every time I see 20 year old college students. I get so see both of these groups on the train to work everyday. Yay for me :x
yellowtamarin wrote:
She won't mind hearing that, as long as you don't follow it up with "because I wish I had a girlfriend all that time".
You're probably right however there are women who wanted to have been in a relationship younger. Not any particular relationship, just a relationship. See here;
https://www.reddit.com/r/ForeverAloneWo ... eir_first/


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Peacesells
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17 Jul 2015, 6:36 am

WantToHaveALife wrote:
I guess men and women are both superficial in their own ways

Don't try to make it look like "oh I am superficial just like everybody else". You are no better than these gold diggers you love to criticize and probably even filthier than them. It's disgusting really. It is only good that you didn't hurt any young lady so far, especially in her teens. It's even thanks to people like you that they become bitchy. Do you know how it hurts to be used and then thrown away, knowing that the love you felt was all fake? It can change a person.
And I don't even know why I try to explain these things to you, because you obviously don't care for anything except your twisted desires. I really hope that you don't find anyone and don't hurt any woman. This of course unless you grow up and give up on your foolish ideas. :(

P.S.: And I am shocked that if a woman says that she thinks income is important in a relationship all the guys here jump on her, whereas none says a word about these things you say.



rdos
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17 Jul 2015, 7:08 am

Peacesells wrote:
P.S.: And I am shocked that if a woman says that she thinks income is important in a relationship all the guys here jump on her, whereas none says a word about these things you say.


It is disgusting with guys that have such views. :mrgreen:



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17 Jul 2015, 11:54 am

kraftiekortie wrote:
George Bernard Shaw, a great playwright, and a straight man, didn't lose his virginity until he was 29.

And?



RetroGamer87
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17 Jul 2015, 6:13 pm

Peacesells wrote:
Don't try to make it look like "oh I am superficial just like everybody else". You are no better than these gold diggers you love to criticize and probably even filthier than them. It's disgusting really. It is only good that you didn't hurt any young lady so far, especially in her teens.
So is it worse when they're in their teens?


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Peacesells
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18 Jul 2015, 2:04 am

RetroGamer87 wrote:
Peacesells wrote:
Don't try to make it look like "oh I am superficial just like everybody else". You are no better than these gold diggers you love to criticize and probably even filthier than them. It's disgusting really. It is only good that you didn't hurt any young lady so far, especially in her teens.
So is it worse when they're in their teens?

It's not, but it can f*** their mind more.



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18 Jul 2015, 2:07 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
She won't mind hearing that, as long as you don't follow it up with "because I wish I had a girlfriend all that time". People often say to their partners "I wish I met you earlier" but it usually means "because you are so awesome that I would like to have spent more time with you". The focus should be on finding the right person for you, not just finding a person. If you just want a girlfriend (whoever will have you), rather than wanting a partnership with someone you adore, it will often show, and be an unattractive trait.


No person can be the right person before you know them, so there's no right person who wasn't just a person at some point in the past. I find it quite annoying that, whenever someone who has never been in a relationship admits how much they want to be in one, they usually get admonished with the assumption that their hypothetical partner would be "just a person" to them. To me, this assumption is tantamount to replying they don't actually want a relationship, as if you could know their wishes better than they do. Why not assume what they want is to find someone they'd love and who would love them, too? This obviously can't happen while you don't find anyone at all. It almost looks like this latter interpretation, which makes much more sense to me, is routinely avoided in order to scold them, and usually by people who have no trouble finding relationships, one after another, but wouldn't tolerate others telling them their partner is "just a person".


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nurseangela
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18 Jul 2015, 2:36 am

Peacesells wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
Peacesells wrote:
Don't try to make it look like "oh I am superficial just like everybody else". You are no better than these gold diggers you love to criticize and probably even filthier than them. It's disgusting really. It is only good that you didn't hurt any young lady so far, especially in her teens.
So is it worse when they're in their teens?

It's not, but it can f*** their mind more.


Peace, I appreciate what you are saying and it's true, but he isn't going to listen. He just wants to get a rise out of you. I wouldn't get your blood pressure up over it. People who use people never come out good in the end (they never really feel good about themselves - if they have a conscience) and this he'll find out for himself. I'd just leave it alone. You're a good person Peace. :)


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WantToHaveALife
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18 Jul 2015, 4:53 am

seriously, wish i could punch a random guys lights out for telling me to "Man Up, Be a Man, Grow a Pair"



RetroGamer87
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18 Jul 2015, 5:13 am

nurseangela wrote:
Peacesells wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
Peacesells wrote:
Don't try to make it look like "oh I am superficial just like everybody else". You are no better than these gold diggers you love to criticize and probably even filthier than them. It's disgusting really. It is only good that you didn't hurt any young lady so far, especially in her teens.
So is it worse when they're in their teens?

It's not, but it can f*** their mind more.


Peace, I appreciate what you are saying and it's true, but he isn't going to listen. He just wants to get a rise out of you.
No I don't.


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Peacesells
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18 Jul 2015, 5:51 am

nurseangela wrote:
Peace, I appreciate what you are saying and it's true, but he isn't going to listen. He just wants to get a rise out of you. I wouldn't get your blood pressure up over it. People who use people never come out good in the end (they never really feel good about themselves - if they have a conscience) and this he'll find out for himself. I'd just leave it alone. You're a good person Peace. :)

Thanks a lot for your words, they are really kind. :)
RetroGamer87 wrote:
No I don't.

I know you don't, maybe she was referring to someone else.



RetroGamer87
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18 Jul 2015, 6:54 am

Oh, OK then.


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yellowtamarin
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21 Jul 2015, 2:05 am

RetroGamer87 wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
She won't mind hearing that, as long as you don't follow it up with "because I wish I had a girlfriend all that time".
You're probably right however there are women who wanted to have been in a relationship younger. Not any particular relationship, just a relationship. See here;
https://www.reddit.com/r/ForeverAloneWo ... eir_first/

The topic is about a male having a girlfriend but of course it applies the other way around as well. I rarely distinguish my general L&D advice between the two sexes.



RetroGamer87
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21 Jul 2015, 5:36 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
RetroGamer87 wrote:
yellowtamarin wrote:
She won't mind hearing that, as long as you don't follow it up with "because I wish I had a girlfriend all that time".
You're probably right however there are women who wanted to have been in a relationship younger. Not any particular relationship, just a relationship. See here;
https://www.reddit.com/r/ForeverAloneWo ... eir_first/

The topic is about a male having a girlfriend but of course it applies the other way around as well. I rarely distinguish my general L&D advice between the two sexes.
That's a good policy. I don't think there's so much difference between the sexes after all.


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