please stop these "any girls out there" threads

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You might want to challenge one to try some diversity.

But hipsters generally shun anyone who is not like them.

No. Please quote me where I said that? Or are you just putting your own assumptions into what I said? (I suspect this is the case).

What I did actually say was this:



If you are not interested in 'hipsters', do not pursue them. And even if you do why would you phrase asking them out in such a manner? I think basically your problem is that you put your own biases and assumptions onto other people and do not really understand that they have different motivations than yourself. You also generalise about people far too much. These kinds of things will not endear you to a potential date.

But the thing is that most Christians don't watch the Simpsons and South Park, or watch indie/foreign films, because they think that those things promote immorality. Also, I don't think I can wait until marriage for sex, but most Christians are firm on waiting, and they don't believe in any sex not leading to procreation.

You said "most". That does not equal "all". It is not that easy to find a partner that ticks all the boxes. It is very rare for someone to end up in a relationship where all of their requirements are met. Open your mind a bit in regards to the women you might want to date. Say, if you find someone who is a Christian, ok with sex before marriage, likes the Simpsons but not South Park, give it a go There is such a thing as too fussy and there is such a thing as too much negative thinking. You seem to have both problems with regards to women. If you think you are not going to meet someone who has the same interests as you, same religion and same views on sex, then you probably will miss an opportunity if it comes up.

And once you are in a long term relationship you might realise that some of the things you want in a partner now are not the things you want in a long term partner.

There used to be 20 or 30 people on WP alone who liked the Simpsons and South Park. Virtually all of them had left. The last one I had contact with was the one who rejected me, and refuses to be my friend anymore. There are no more female Aspies--of any religion--who like the Simpsons and South Park who are single.

So you are restricting yourself to Aspie females who like Simpsons and South Park and who are on WP? There are plenty of Aspies who are not on Wrong Planet you know. And plenty of NT women you might get on with who are Christian, want premarital sex and like those shows. And as I said, once you are in a relationship you might realise that having them not be into South Park or Simpsons is not a deal breaker that you thought it was.

Again, you generalise. This is a very bad thing to do when you are seeking a relationship. You really need to keep an open mind or else you will miss people who don't seem right but you actually might get on great with. I know n=1 and all but my long term partner really did not appeal to me as a potential date when I first met him. Physically he was not my type (pale and skinny), he seemed passive (I like sexually aggressive men) and his interests (TV, music, movies, hobbies) were not exactly aligned with mine. It didn't take long before I found him very physically attractive and discovered that his day to day personality is not usually a reflecting of how he was in bed and that we did in fact, have many common interests and those that we do not share were really not a big deal. I am sure I am not the only person who has experienced this when first meeting their life partner or even just a new person to date.

I am on other forums, and WP was the only one where there were any female Aspies who like the Simpsons and South Park (not the case any more).

Tim why do you ignore my other points?

It's not like having a checklist matters... the one overarching criteria I have for a woman is that she actually likes me... yet even that is impossible...

I contacted 100 people on one dating site who had the same interests, and only 2 people replied. And the correspondences only lasted one e-mail.

Most of the hipsters on there explicitly said not to message them if you are conservative.

Again you are completely ignoring any advice to tell you that same interests are not the be-all and end all. And that you generalise. And that you make assumptions about people that may not be true. And that you are too closed minded in what you are looking for in a relationship and this makes it likely that you will miss opportunities when they come along.

Quite honestly, if this is generally how you communicate I can see why you do not get more than one email. Basically you are doing the equivalent of not listening in real life when someone tries to hold a conversation with you but online. People don't want someone who doesn't know how to interact. So either learn how to interact in a conversation or find someone who doesn't care that you do not listen. I think the latter is going to make it a lot harder for you to find someone, but of course, it is really your decision and I do not think there is a right or wrong answer. People have to make up their own minds about the choices they make in life.

Maybe you need to get out of Texas. there are huge swaths of the U.S. where Christians have no opinion on the morality of the Simpsons and many who have sex before marriage. For all I know, there are Christians like that in Texas, too. To improve your chances, follow Saspie's advice.

It's a bad move but it's probably their....fictive last chance. One wouldn't post such thread unless he failed in all other ways before.

To Saspie and ViperaAspis:

I have had that situation too of almost always being in a relationship, although a lot of them were "damaged goods" or I settled for the first person who said hi.


I'm speculating that one of the reasons so many have been single in your life (other than possibly still mending from a bad relationship) is that they lack "game" or social interaction skills, and most people see that as a flaw, so they stay away, whereas with Aspies the other person's "real personality" instead of their social persona is what we see, and we like it as we tend to not like the games aspect.

BTW I see this in my own personal life - yesterday I had a potential piano student who told me point blank that he would not hire me to teach piano because I did not know when to stop talking. It was just an interview and I was discussing my talents/experiences. So the NT world would rather have a social butterfly without skills/education, if it makes them FEEL socially good, rather than as monomaniacal instructor like myself who has not only done it all in the music business but was born with perfect pitch, etc., etc. He extrapolated one awkward moment to "Polymathpoolplayer can't teach because he is too wrapped up into himself"; so he will never know what he is missing, namely: being part of the group of many happy students I interact with who actually refer me to their friends to take lessons, including students who return to my studio after periods of unemployment or traveling out of the country on business.

YES! Yes. I get this. And it is a sad truth. There are those who believe <<<OCH!>>> sorry, I must diverge... <Cue original Battlestar Galactica music> "There are those who believe... that life here... began out there"... Okay, that's resolved now. Continuing: There are those who believe that if A seems wrong then B thru Z cannot be right. Your "A" may be wrong (i.e. you "talk a lot". So what). But your B-Z is more "true" or "in-tune" than the others. But this is not seen because the "A" differs. I really feel that this sort of mentation is the province of f0ols. I don't know why people think this way.

ADD'L PROPS FOR PPP:
I'm so glad you can move thru the music. It pwns me. I can't even function when music takes over. And it takes over a lot. I'm only giving you the BSG reference above, but there are many more, even in this very post. It makes it so hard to put thoughts together. Also, you seem scarily brilliant. I'm a bit scared to reply to you because of this.