What would you say is your main barrier in relationships?

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My relationship barriers:

-Abandonment/ Jealousy Issues:
I need constant reassurance to the conturary that my partner isn't going to leave me, cheat on me, look at another person or do anything that might further fuel my festering anxiety. This is due to having cripplingly low self confidence stemming from my father walking out when I was at an impressionable age. It left a deep wound that may never heal without years of expensive therapy I have no hope of affording.

-Control Freakery:
I need to feel in control in order to function properly. In a sense, I was spoilt in life and used to getting things my way. Of course, there is a LITTLE wiggle room as I'm slowly loosing up as the years go by but because I'm so terrified of being abandoned, I need to feel that my hold on the reigns is tight enough to maintain order and control because when I'm control, I don't feel as vulnerable.

-Unable To Find Sexual Satisfaction:
Stems from my first time being non-consentual and many years of being told that I had to wait "at least 6 months or until I had a ring on my finger" before getting intimate. Granted, my mother has relaxed somewhat over the years but because of her prolonged infliction of 'Catholic guilt' upon me, I often feel very repressed and 'sinful' in the increasingly rare occasions I'm physical with a man. I also feel I cannot convey my kinks, fantasies or preferances out of fear of ridicule or judgement and as a result, my sexual life has been severely lacklustre as of late.
Any man who wishes to have a physical relationship with me needs to understand also that although I'm bossy and domineering outside of the bedroom, I am actually very submissive and have very 'unsual' tastes to be addressed.

Sometimes, I think the only way any relationship of mine will ever work is if I find myself a live in gimp to do my bidding... *overly dramatic sigh*

For me, it's because I am a Christian and vote Republican.

I have to say its because of my AS. I'm 41. Been trying pretty much all my adult life to have a strong healthy sig other relationship, it always fails due to an isue with my AS.

No matter how hard i work on reading body languge, social skills, ect.. Something always happens where I totally misead the other person and I make an ass of myself, or she trys and tells me something important in a non direct way and I misread it. This is usally after I ask them to try and be straghtfoward and up front with me because I have trouble reading people.

Well, for me it's a series of things.

The relationship never happens. That's the biggest one. I miss the signs, or I say the wrong thing, or I become completely withdrawn for a time, and that's it. It never came to be.

In a relationship? No matter how introverted or homey or self-sufficient someone is, they invariably try to bring me into a group of friends, invite people over, etc. I'm not comfortable, and it is always evident how strange I am to aforementioned people.

I can't speak what I think. I'm communicating wrongly. I'm always misread, and I never asked to diffuse bombs.

And then there's the kicker. I'm gay . . . which reduces my options drastically (especially when you further filter out the even vaguely stereotypical clubgoers) and on top of that, I'm a preoperative FTM. To summarize, my dating app should read as such:

1. Handle yourself.
2. Let's do our own thing, and without each other or other people as a need.
3. I'm more than odd. I'll try but you need to at least let me run if it's too much.
4. I'm gay. You should be too . . .
5. I have some . . . non-male parts. This a problem? (see number four)

So for me, it's seeming hopeless.

right now? distance. My girlfriend's in Indiana & i'm in Washington.

I don't know what I'm doing.

Mine would be my shyness. I have never asked a girl out because I was afraid to. It always felt uncomfortable.

Being obese, having no education after junior high, only being interested in having BSDM sex with submissive women.

the fact that a concpet of me being in a relationship just naturallisticly feels wrong, like its never meant to happen,

general awkwardness/ shyness / uncomfortableness
I need to get comfortable with someone before I can really talk to them and etc.. And that can take a while. Girls don't usually try to get over that hurdle because the akwardness/shyness at first is pretty terrible. And even after i'm comfortable with someone I still don't come off as "normal".

I am specifically looking for a female Aspie who likes the Simpsons and South Park, but the only two who are Christian and vote Republican are already in relationships. One of them refuses to even be my friend anymore.

All the other female Aspies who like the Simpsons and South Park are of the artsy hipster liberal type, who refuse to date Christians who vote Republican. To fit in with them, you also have to drive either a Prius or a bicycle, be a vegetarian, drink fancy European beers, wear worn-out jeans and a Che Guevara T-shirt everywhere you go, support abortion and same-sex marriage (I oppose both), and vote Democratic.

My main barriers are :
-- My lack of empathy, making it hard for me to respond accordingly to her emotional needs and thus making it difficult to stay emotionally close to a woman.
-- My difficulties with prioritising and my subsequent issues with getting all household shores done.