Men of the Forum: you need a hobby

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You can judge me however you want. At least I admit I've made mistakes and owned up to them. It doesn't make you any better of a person to have a condescending attitude.

Nice try - guilt-tripping won't work.

Sorry Kilroy, I'll stop derailing the thread - I hope thing work out for you the best way!

no problem. i've gotten a few PMs like that too, and i hate it. it feels sneaky when people curse and yell in a PM.

i always figure if i have something mean or nasty to say, i should be willing to say it publicly and face the music, or else i should just shut up.

Both of you should report those PMs, there are consequence for such behaviour.

no no, this is what the thread is for

yes, i do that. it's my way of making it public, in a sense. the last time it happened i was partly to blame so i went back and edited my post that offended the person. but i also still told the mods, just in case the person makes a habit of doing that.

What really hurts me thou is that people actually think that about me. I know that's not true but I hate that I give that impression. Me like lots of others here are extremely misjudged by NTs but unfortunately it seems we can misjudge other Aspies to. If we can not even get along & be understood by other Aspies; what chance do we have


'
I'm going to give em a chance for it to drop but I will report em if they don't. I think some of it is a huge misunderstanding

God, I'd kill to receive one of those PMs. They're so much better than PMs that contain actual arguments and actual valid points.

^
Check your inbox you dirty feminazi...

It's very heartening to see the solidarity between a few posters here.
Getting called a "man-hater", "femi-nazi", and FAR FAR worse (I've received death threats for telling men they have no "right" to have sex) has been wearing on me.

Even apart from all the sexist generalizations about women, there are a few people here who genuinely show sociopathic tendencies, and I fear for the safety of the women in their lives. Rape jokes, calling women wh*res and b!tches, asserting women love a "tough, dominant male" to overpower them...it all creates an environment of acceptance for this line of thinking, and I'd hardly be surprised if this eventually led to an actual assault being attempted.

I've seen things said here that on other forums would get a person IP-BANNED FOR LIFE, if not reported to the police,
yet on WP these posts make up the majority of some threads. I'm not sure how to remedy the situation. Several long-standing contributors and friends have LEFT this site because it tolerates so much misogyny and hostility toward women. It's not an issue of ineffective response- I've yet to see the administrators try to address the problem at ALL.

Last edited by Bethie on 02 Dec 2010, 12:23 am, edited 2 times in total.

I rarely post in this particular forum but for the past few months I've been reading a lot of the threads here and the level of misogyny is depressing and actually quite distressing at times. As previous posters on this thread have pointed out a lot of the men who post here complaining do receive excellent and well-intentioned advice which they chose to ignore or rubbish in favour of their own ill-informed and extremely sexist world-view.

It seems that some of these men are now trying to say that women are sexist or unreasonable solely because they have been called on their bad attitudes by women (and some other men).

There are men who post about their lack of success with women and blame it on their AS, their lack of a job/low level of job, low income, physique, poor "social status" and so on ad nauseam. For the majority, if not all of those men, these things are not the problem. They have no success with women because their attitude towards women stinks big time. They see women as objects whose only purpose is to provide them with sex. No wonder they don't have girlfriends!

What is frightening is their inability/refusal to understand that women are real human beings, and that they are not entitled to a relationship. They are bitter and often aggressive in the language they use about women. It seems to me that there is a small number of men here who are only a step away from actually attacking women in real life. That scares me.

Last edited by Marcia on 02 Dec 2010, 12:21 am, edited 2 times in total.

and people tell me daily I am a troll and the bad guy for reacting to this stuff

Absolutely, Marcia. I'm glad it's not just me who's imagined the potential consequences of this kind of egging-on between misogynists.


Now, all- what's to be done about it?

you are stronger than me! i hate you for that. okay, no i don't. sigh. more like admiration. i'm like your super-fan on here.

My advice is directed at those men on the site who seem bitter over either not getting recreational sex or not having a girlfriend. I can't feel bad for a guy just because he wants to use a woman for her body or because he thinks he's entitled to a certain girlfriend.

Say what you want about people like Toad and Nick, but they're just genuinely lonely men and want ANY woman that will give them a chance...and don't blame women for their lack of success. Sure they have low self-esteem they need to work on, but at least they don't sound volatile.

I admittedly was out of line my last couple weeks as ForeverYoung, and I came back the next day and apologized because I realized my hormones had gotten the best of me.

The real me doesn't even care about sex without an emotional connection. My body just controls my mind sometimes, which I'm addressing with my psychiatrist and trying to find the right combination to lower my sex drive while not messing with my anti-depressant.

That's why I don't get why Salla and possibly a few others have a problem with me. I've said nothing negative about women as a whole or nothing sexual about women since I"ve returned. It seems she's mad based on what I already said before or simply because she just wants to hate on me.

I'm trying to help the guys on here that may have been in positions I was in before at one point. Like I said in my "How To Improve Your Chances With Women" thread...the first step is improving one's self-esteem and/or mental health before worrying about meeting any woman for any reason.

i have said the same thing. when men say stuff like women "deserve what's coming to them", it truly worries me IRL.

i report it to the mods, but then the men just back off a bit and make it seem like it was just rhetorical. and i wonder if i am overreacting too.