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OK Cupid experiment: Full disclosure

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Grisha
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11 Jan 2011, 12:23 am

UPDATE

OK, got yet another hot lead!

Same thing, smart, cute, etc etc....

Of course these might all come to nothing, but that wasn't the point of the experiment.

I can clearly say that my reponse rate has actually improved since I flagrantly disclosed my AS - entirely contrary to my expectations. Unfortunately I may have left too many variables uncontrolled because the other revisions to my profile were substantial, but I can tentatively conclude that my Asperger disclosure was not the quite the "deal-breaker" I thought it was.

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go out and buy an "I Have Asperger's" t-shirt and go hang out at a swimsuit model convention. :wink:



Grisha
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12 Jan 2011, 11:20 am

Update.

OK, everything sucks again.

The women who expressed some interest have completely disappeared :roll:

Sorry for all the whining, I'm getting sick of it myself.



Moog
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12 Jan 2011, 1:40 pm

Ah, that seems to happen to me a lot. :roll: Sorry to hear it.


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renexu
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12 Jan 2011, 5:04 pm

Ok. I'm an aspies girl. My advice from a friend is: disclose AS at the 6th date.
I'm not seriously disabled. I have skills but no job. Some income from programming. Should I disclose AS on my online dating profile?



Jono
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12 Jan 2011, 6:50 pm

Grisha wrote:
Update.

OK, everything sucks again.

The women who expressed some interest have completely disappeared :roll:

Sorry for all the whining, I'm getting sick of it myself.


Do you mean that their profiles have disappeared? Otherwise, if they just haven't replied to you then perhaps wait a few days before writing them off. If someone hasn't replied to me, I also check to see if they've been on-line since I sent my last message. On the other hand, if their profiles have disappeared or are hidden from you, then I'm sorry to hear that. The first person to have expressed interest in me disappeared as well.



Grisha
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12 Jan 2011, 7:05 pm

Jono wrote:
Grisha wrote:
Update.

OK, everything sucks again.

The women who expressed some interest have completely disappeared :roll:

Sorry for all the whining, I'm getting sick of it myself.


Do you mean that their profiles have disappeared? Otherwise, if they just haven't replied to you then perhaps wait a few days before writing them off. If someone hasn't replied to me, I also check to see if they've been on-line since I sent my last message. On the other hand, if their profiles have disappeared or are hidden from you, then I'm sorry to hear that. The first person to have expressed interest in me disappeared as well.


Not blocked or anything, they just stopped messaging me. Happens a lot in the online world, I was hoping to maybe get a face-to-face with at least one of them. Maybe, they'll reappear, but my intuition is telling me otherwise.

Oh well, I'm going to keep trying, only takes one... :)



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13 Jan 2011, 12:02 am

I know it's discouraging and frustrating. I never have stuck around dating sites for very long because the ones i am interested in disappear. I didn't last long at eHarmony--they sent me the most depressing matches. It reminded me of that SNL skit "Lowered Expectations." One match as with a policeman, and I'm very, um, not good with authority figures. LOL. Esp. ones with guns. :roll:

I like your jeep. I always a wanted a Jeep. You inspired me to fill out my profile--back in Nov I set up aprofile tot ake teh Autism test, but never filled out the profile. But I did after reading this and my new profile includes me mentioning I have Asperger's. I'm curious how that'll go over myself. I don't have a pic up yet, but I'm not terribly serious bout meeting someone, not romantically at least. But if by chance there's someone out there who's not scared off by my Asperger's, strange self-deprecating humor and my numerous mentions of graph paper, I wouldn't mind making a new friend! And I like taking the tests.

http://www.okcupid.com/profile

I'm thinking of signing up as A-list member so I can change my username. That ne i just came up with on a fly when I too the autism test, and it really sucks.



Grisha
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13 Jan 2011, 12:18 am

Mercurial wrote:
I know it's discouraging and frustrating. I never have stuck around dating sites for very long because the ones i am interested in disappear. I didn't last long at eHarmony--they sent me the most depressing matches. It reminded me of that SNL skit "Lowered Expectations." One match as with a policeman, and I'm very, um, not good with authority figures. LOL. Esp. ones with guns. :roll:

I like your jeep. I always a wanted a Jeep. You inspired me to fill out my profile--back in Nov I set up aprofile tot ake teh Autism test, but never filled out the profile. But I did after reading this and my new profile includes me mentioning I have Asperger's. I'm curious how that'll go over myself. I don't have a pic up yet, but I'm not terribly serious bout meeting someone, not romantically at least. But if by chance there's someone out there who's not scared off by my Asperger's, strange self-deprecating humor and my numerous mentions of graph paper, I wouldn't mind making a new friend! And I like taking the tests.

http://www.okcupid.com/profile

I'm thinking of signing up as A-list member so I can change my username. That ne i just came up with on a fly when I too the autism test, and it really sucks.


What is your user name? I can't see your profile using the link you provided.

And yes, I Love my jeep, I'm getting it ready for the desert season right now...



nthach
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13 Jan 2011, 12:41 am

I wished I had a cool car. I want a Lexus hybrid - all the benefits of a Prius, none of the handicaps of a Prius. Meaning I can take a Lexus RX400h/RX450h to Tahoe with confidence. Whereas the Prius will throw a fit and go into meltdown in the snow.



Mercurial
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13 Jan 2011, 1:08 am

Quote:

What is your user name? I can't see your profile using the link you provided.

And yes, I Love my jeep, I'm getting it ready for the desert season right now...


grr, I forgot to add that. Sorry. My user name, until I get it changed, is Coroty. Try this: http://www.okcupid.com/profile/Coroty

A Jeep would be great for El Paso. My chevy Cavalier is not at all built for going offroad and I would love to go hiking in the desert, but without proper offroad transpo, it'd just be stupid. Alas, I'm too poor to get a new car right now, so i just eye my neighbor's Wrangler enviously.



Grisha
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13 Jan 2011, 9:30 am

renexu wrote:
Ok. I'm an aspies girl. My advice from a friend is: disclose AS at the 6th date.
I'm not seriously disabled. I have skills but no job. Some income from programming. Should I disclose AS on my online dating profile?


I sort of think it depends on how "Aspie" you are, I'm going to "disclose" on my first date whether I actually say anything about it or not, so I think it's best to get it out there first.

If you are a little better compensated, I would probably wait...