Hey Moog. Thanks as always for sharing my articles.
To those concerned with the "sales-ness" of the article...yes, there's a book to sell, but the fact that I support myself through my site is only an added benefit to being able to write about content I love and engage with like-minded people.
Moog can attest that I am ALWAYS willing to discuss this information in more detail for absolutely free. I live and breath this stuff, and I don't back-down from any criticism.
Don't believe me? E-mail me about
anything in regards to personal development and I will give a carefully thought-out response:
[email protected]. I'm not just in this for a quick buck.
That being said, let me address a few criticisms in this thread:
TheygoMew wrote:
These form of mind games are abusive and doesn't make me want to chase but run away.
Those are flags of someone who is an insecure controlling sadistic type. Only those who are cruel and view women as just objects think those mind games are the best way so ladies if you come across these as*holes, don't chase...RUN!
What "mind games" are you referring to? Did you read the article or did you just regurgitate your prejudices about the Pick-Up Community? The reason being is I constantly hear this criticism from people, but when I prod further they seem to know very little about just how varied individuals in the PU community really are.
Are there some sadistic, narcissists in the community? Absolutely. Is everyone in the community mentally messed up? Far from it - that would be a very narrow and blinding generalization about a bunch of people who I doubt you really know.
This isn't geared toward you specifically TheygoMew, but I always find it ironic when people are more than happy to accept personal development advice, but when it is framed in the context of "how to interact better with women" that all-of-a-sudden makes it selfish and narcissistic.
Some women will complain on one side of their mouth that they "wish there were better men out there" and then complain on the other side when men actually take an active and conscious role to be better romantics. Some people you
truly can't please.
AsteroidNap wrote:
Hmm, I found the article to be little more than a 4000 word plug for the dude's book. Here's the thing with this sort of approach in my opinion. It acts as a filter that only allows a certain type of woman through. It's not a universal, magic solution.
Yes there is a book for sale, but a 4,000 word plug? Chase didn't even mention his book ONCE throughout the course of the interview - it's only talked about when I bring it up. I won't deny that there is an intent to sell, but this is a cheap-shot at the information Chase provides in the article.
Also, in regards to the bolded text, this is a criticism you can make about literally
anything, but that doesn't mean it can't be really helpful for many people. If you're looking for "magic solutions" then you're going to find yourself dismissing every piece of information and advice that comes your way. Ultimately, it's a dangerous and self-defeating criticism.
Grisha wrote:
My major criticism of the PUA approach, it not only does it only appeal to a certain kind of woman, it presents a false impression of who you actually are which will inevitably backfire. It's only useful/appropriate for one-night-stands or "flings" and pretty much useless for "real" relationships...
This is a fair criticism. A lot of PUA material (and personal development material, more broadly) has to do with a bit of personality change.
But what
is your personality anyway? Upon reflection you'll find it's not a static and fixed thing, it is constantly changing and evolving in the face of new experiences and information. Who you
were 10 years ago is probably quite different than who you are today. And who you
will be in 10 years will probably be quite different from who you are today.
Changes are inevitable, the only difference is PUA material (and personal development) is about playing a more conscious role in a process that is happening to you whether you are aware of it or not.
I've personally changed a lot over the past 6 years I've been involved with this stuff, but it was a concious and organic change. In many ways, I am still the same. I still have the same goofy personality, eclectic tastes, and awkward demeanor, but I've learned how to express it in a way that benefits my social interactions in a way that I could NEVER achieve if I didn't play a conscious role in who I become.
Be very careful in the belief of a "fixed self" - Buddhists often identify this as the very cause of suffering itself.
----
Cheers to everyone who shared their thoughts. I'll check back if anyone has anything else to add.
Men always claim women are wrong about what they want so then they go and listen to men who aren't women. These are abusive mind games. I've seen it in action and unfortunately I was the star of this kind of stupid mind game. He wouldn't let up and by the end of it, he didn't get what he wanted which was sex and I had to put up with BS from other women that was not necessary.
How about men quit claiming women don't know what they want and resort to these immature games never admitting when it blows up in their face to save their face.
Either that or I think it's time for women to pull the same s**t and see how you like it. Only then maybe you will see how abusive it really is.
31 Aug 2011, 10:09 am
