Don't smile

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You shouldnt pretend you are something you are not just because the norm is attracted to a certain thing,relatiosnhips where you cant be yourself dont usually last(she realizes that its all an act/you get tired of pretending rather quickly)

I never smile and it's gotten me nowhere.

Does anyone know if this applies for females too? I'm curious. I have more of a neutral look most of the time. I've never really been approached as anything other than a friendship, off the internet, anyway.

I rarely smile (although it is very easy for me to find a reason to laugh). Where are the hordes of women?

Then again, my lips have a weird "smiley" shape. It is very subtle, but anyone can see it up close.

Also, why would I care?

So not smiling is a good thing :O

What about the occasional cheeky grin ??

Smiles should be spontaneous and involuntary, not rehearsed or faked. So should brooding looks. So should all facial expressions. Just let your face do its own thing, that's what I say.

I couldn't care less about what "studies" conclude. I agree with Spongy. Just be yourself. If somebody likes you, great. If they don't, fine. They're not the one for you. So what? There's no point in faking facial expressions (or anything else) to attract somebody. Once they find out the fake person wasn't the real you, they will lose interest anyway. Just be authentic from the start.

For every study that says one thing, there will be another to contradict it anyway. And what does it matter what X percent of people think? It only matters what that one special person thinks of you. The rest don't matter at all.

I've not done that... I was merely stating that it could be possible if the roles were reversed from the original post. Also it was only an example.

What about dating sites? wouldn't that info be useful for it?

You people here are too much falseness paranoid - relax.

I didnt intend to accuse you of doing it, I was just stating what usually happens when people do it.


As for the dating site: dont ask me. My pictures on okcupid suck and I seriously need to update them(have a few decent ones because Ive been trying to go out more lately and one of my friends usually brings a camera along)

No.

Assuming I participated on any, (which I currently don't but I have in the past) I would not delete my photo and rush off and take a different profile pic with a different expression just because of the latest findings of some "study" done by people I don't know, conducted on people I don't know, in an attempt to mold myself into the person that the "study" suggests I ought to be. I'd rather just be myself, if it's all the same to you.




I'd say it's the other way round. You seem to be afraid of just being yourself and seem to worry far too much about what all these ridiculous surveys have to say.

If I followed every "study" out there on the Internet, I would turn into a patchwork Frankenstein. Here's what might happen:

One study might say "men prefer long hair" so I'd anxiously start growing it. Another might say "men prefer skinny women" so I'd start starving myself. Then I'd have to get implants because another study would say men like big boobs, which are impossible when you're anorexic. Oops, they like short hair now. Better cut it off. Wait, they like women who like the first move. No, now they like shy yet playful girls - with LONG HAIR!! WHY DID I CUT IT ALL OFF??! Oh no! Now it says men like tall women. Better have surgery to make my legs longer - ouch. That was sore. Now I'd better start scowling at men because smiling is deemed unattractive. Wait, what's the current opinion on hair this month? Darn, long again. Now I need some extensions (and some new boob implants. The old ones burst). Darn it, now freckes are cute. I'd better have some tattoed on. OH NO! Freckles are out of fashion! Now I need laser surgery. Wait, my pale skin is unattractive and pasty according to a recent survey. Better get a spray tan...oops. Now I have a horrible allergic rash.



Do people really live like this?



I'll smile when I'm happy and frown when I'm sad, and keep my own natural physique and just be who I am.

Why don't you just be yourself? That way someone will be attracted to you one day because of your uniqueness rather than for your ability to follow trends.

First, It's not a stupid survey, do a quick google search and you'll find that many studies got the same conclusion.

Second, spare me the idealism.

If you were a 30+ virgin you wouldn't come to give us such lectures in moral, pure genuineness and one-should-always-stay-as-himself-no-matter-what.

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 02 May 2012, 10:27 am, edited 1 time in total.

chill, your virginity is not a trump card in every other discussion.

If you ask me, worrying too much about how to be real is just as bad as worrying how to fit in or charm others.
It's being fake to yourself because you are overly controlling how "real" you want people to see yourself as. The only thing is it has a much more adverse affect than throwing on the occasional charm (intentionally or unintentionally). You will just end up lonely.

Users, just discuss the damn topic and stop throwing personal assumptions (ie, you're worrying too much).

/ To the main topic.

I was actually defending a point or two you made in a previous post, Boo, but sure I'll stick to the topic.

I find it very hard to smile, and tbh the smiley pics haven't really worked in my favour anyway. I threw this one onto a dating site and was contacted 3 times within 1 day so I'd say it's a fairly accurate survey we are discussing

Im sorry boo but you asked a question and she replied it.
I dont see how that is going off topic/derailing the thread