Dumped after 4 (great) dates, why?

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A negative generalization, fought with a positive generalization that merely defend the mindset each person that gave it have. Hilarious! some are gold diggers some are not. It could happen, it could also not happen. I swear, people are so quick to put down other genders and defend their own just as quickly in this forum. Not a dig at either of you two, just something I seem to notice that creeps into every thread.

I think there are certain obvious signs to look out for as far as gold diggers go.
And to answer your question, Boo, someone asking only about your material things (specifically your income and wealth) is more than likely a gold digger, depending how keen or disinterested they become afterwards. I don't get why that is so hard for many to identify, I guess the truth hurts (even though it can apply to both genders there seems to be this attitude here it only applies to one and many defend against it instead of looking at it as a 2 gender thing).

Unless I missed something, I don't see any evidence for the "golddigger" hypothesis.

It may or may not have to do with the Asperger's, but unless she is a shallow shell of a human being, I doubt it.

I think it may have to do with the missed cue on wanting coitus. Granted I wouldn't have figured it out either, as that situation would be very awkward for me.

I would be thinking "is she wanting sex or did she just want to spend time together?"

JanuaryMan, i would sure like to see how it is inaccurate to say that most women are NOT golddiggers. in that statement i acknowledge that there are exceptions to the rule. has it occurred to you that i (and other members) have spent hundreds of hours trying to counter the pervasive and inaccurate anti-female mentality on WP? from your jokey little observation i'd say that you have absolutely no idea what it is like to belong to a group that is almost constantly trashed on this forum.

It's as inaccurate as saying most women are. It's as inaccurate as saying most men are jerks or most men aren't jerks.
Because I'm saying it's inaccurate to say most women aren't gold diggers doesn't mean I'm supporting the idea most women are (because I don't think that is the case). The thing is with these discussions I prefer to be very impartial and non partisan to the discussion and I notice many are not (there is always something personal, or people somehow relating the topic to their sense of their gender identity and thus having the need to feel to defend it). I respect peoples' right to do that, but I think sometimes they need to be made aware they are doing it.

EDIT: I'm not aware how much hours you spend on this hyperlexian, and I sure wouldn't envy your role in doing so. Sorry to hear this is a problem for you. But I don't think it's anyone's role to be a mascot or peace ambassador for either gender. I mean, we have rules and stuff. If people go to far (which happens all the time) the easy thing to do is for folks like me to report it. Trying to defend women all the time will not only be strenuous on your part but jade your posts (against people like myself) who hold neither a pro or anti stance on men and women.

Last edited by JanuaryMan on 14 May 2012, 11:09 am, edited 1 time in total.

You're not a money grabber, so you've nothing to worry about. This place does seem to be a bit mysoginistic in my short time here, it's also a bit depressing too but as JM says you don't have to get involved in everything.

I strongly disagree. If a woman is going to be accepting she's going to be way more easily if you do tell her (maybe the third date is a bit too early, even though in my case that worked out well anyway) because when communication problems emerge - and they are going to emerge - it's more likely that she will be understanding if she knows. If a woman is not going to be accepting it's good for her to know so she can get out of it fast before the relationship turns out to be like the ones on the site "AS partners".

Hyperlexian just be quite, trying to show someone how they have a misconception makes you take a side and that would not make sense. People shouldn't have biases. As long as someone does not report something do not worry about it! women are stupid.

For the record, I don't like my posts to be quoted to support or fulfil personal attacks on other users or genders. Hyperlexian has done nothing wrong as such. Her only crime is to be extremely passionate about removing some of the frankly prehistoric views in this section. I don't always agree with the statements or reasons but that doesn't matter

EDIT #1: Quote fail!
EDIT #2: ON TOPIC: - I think the woman liked your social chemistry, OP, but not the physical chemistry. She might respect you have AS or different needs, and then she also has her own needs to think about as well. A lot of people believe you know your partner better once you've slept with them (placing physical and emotional connections into one basket). It might not make sense to why she decided to stop dating you even if the dates went well, but then again I guess it doesn't have to. I think you'd be a very good friend to her judging from how your dates went so that's always a plus.

How is that wrong?

*sigh*

It isn't wrong. I'm not sure how to describe it to you but it's a form of saying something positive about somebody. Trust me.

Then why did you complain about it in the part I quoted earlier?

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postp4632603.html#4632603

Delphiki, what on Earth are you talking about now? You highlighted something in bold, didn't understand it, ignored my explanation and went on to argue something else because you didn't win whatever argument you felt it was you had to win. It's possible for 2 people to have similar views but disagree on things without seeing each other as bad people or whatever group they belong to as a demonic clan. Now please don't quote me again!

Again: ON TOPIC, see 2-3 posts above.

Wow, lets just calm down here folks. Argue about something else? I asked an innocent question to try to understand what you meant, What I asked about had to do with what I was talking to you about. I am just trying to develop a better understanding of the world

Last edited by Delphiki on 14 May 2012, 1:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I'm glad it didn't, because I directly asked you not to quote me again (at least for the remainder of this topic).
To explain further, what I did was put a positive spin on what some (like you) were seeing as a negative situation. It is possible to do this by using negative terms in a positive light. I was avoiding going into it much further because it would make a scene and drag the topic even further off topic. Something I've now had to do just so you can get a better explanation of things.

3rd attempt to get this back on topic: OP, good luck with the friendship. I'm sure it'll work out

She is allowed to have her own opinion about member´s posts and express it just as any other member.
If you find anything on the site that contradicts the statement above feel free to post a link.