"You'll find someone, I know you will."

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As a woman, yes. As a man, there is no guarantee whatsoever, and any guarantee of the polar opposite has more practical examples to vouch for it. If you predict situation A, and situation B (women are closed to any attempts to contact them; women insult you; women gossip about you; women even attempt to destroy your reputation with other men after a friendly conversation) occurs time and time again with no trace of situation A (what you claimed), it's time to revise your predictions and start assuming situation B to be true in order to be more efficient in your methods and therefore in your goals.



That's really hard when you're genuinely unappealing.



First of all, keep the term 'you' out of that. I'm not a nice guy, and the only reason I might be keeping a relaxed and friendly tone at times is because I'm currently at my second official warning on this forum. Furthermore, according to contemporary psychology, friendly and quiet men (not nice guys) becoming jocks would greatly increase their chances of women finding them. Indeed, no matter how hard this is debated, the men called 'jocks' by nice guys are simply guys who know what it takes to be succesful, and I applaud them for that.



That's absolutely true, and the - mostly - women who say this should be reminded of that on these occasions. Do not assume there is another woman who would feel attracted to a man, especially if it's a theoretical one. A rule of life is that there is always a steady group of young men who are completely unable to find a partner, and they're the people hearing this excuse too often. You're telling them there's a lifeboat and a rescue ship when there's nothing but cold, watery abyss below them and they might as well go down with the ship. If you'd be honest, and if people would be honest, we wouldn't have sickening excuses like this.

Again, it's how it's being said, not what's being said. I guess I can also include who's saying it as a criteria as well. I don't deny the existence of potential positivity within that statement. Like I mentioned in an earlier response, there have been friends who say it and mean it in a positive light, but the majority of the time it has not.



I'm a little bit offended you're calling me a negative person simply because I'm expressing some form of disagreement with you.

If it's of any relevance I am single right now and am quite enjoying it.
To those that are, and are actually seeking someone - you could find someone, but you might end up worse for it.
But be positive and go out there thinking you could be entirely better for it, and you never know you could be right.

The one thing people get caught up on is "how" they will find somebody and they think by ticking this box they are guaranteed something. This is no better than an entitlement complex and will likely fail. Certain things do help chances but can't guarantee them.

Someone's been watching anime/hentai too much.

/Just kidding of course, please forgive me.

What HDM said times a million. Again.

I'd like to add that attitude has almost nothing to do with it; I was a positive young fella for years 'til I opened my eyes and saw how crazy this world is. There are guys with even more horrible attitudes that have everything going for them.

That made me remember a friend of mine that complained a lot about being alone! He said to me that same phrase in 2003, after I told him about a rejection I suffered few weeks ago. He said to me "You'll find someone very, very soon, I'm sure".

Since then, he has had 4 girlfriends.

Since then, I have had 0 boyfriends.

Empty words

They're hollow. All of them. Intended to be white lies, but in fact the deepest, most abyssal shade of black. Good intentions that do absolutely nothing to alleviate anyone's misery.
This unnecessary apology is more like saying 'bless you' or 'gesundheid' or 'santé' or 'gezondheid' - or any variation of that - when someone sneezes.

Yeah... those words full of... inertia... You sneeze; "bless you", you tell someone about your last rejection; "Don't worry, you'll find someone", you tell to the same person, six years later, about a new rejection; "Don't worry, you'll find someone".

I never said something like that to someone, to me is quite obvious that "love" is not like a cold, it's not always just around the corner.

That is an oxymoron.

nope, its actually very common

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But in all seriousness, it's that kind of attitude that has kept me motivated, even when i get real close to snapping and losing my mind over relationships and the whole concept of it.

And for some people in this thread who keep shunning the positive attitudes that are trying to be conveyed (because of falsified facts that they "can never get anyone, it's so hopeless, why bother trying?)

I give you:

But if you have a horrible attitude, there's something going against you. You can't have a bad quality AND have EVERYTHING going for you.

you can be a total jerk. Only difference being is that they show confidence when others lack it.

Pretty much ... there are really only two valid choices, care and try or don't care and don't try. To care but not try to even change your attitudes or adopt some more positive outlook is just an absurd and futile expression of entitlement. And to not care but try, obviously doesn't happen.

Fate is always playing weird tricks on me, too. When I care and try, I get nothing. I want something so I can't have it. But when I say, "OK I quit, that's it, I'm done" ... well then life throws something wonderful at me and says I'm not allowed to opt out; right when I'm least prepared. Also life doesn't seem to be fooled much by reverse psychology, so it doesn't really work to just pretend one thing so the other will happen. In the end the only thing to do is just go with the flow I guess.

Me too. I know they are being kind, but I know that it's very slim in finding someone. My social/communication skills suck, most people I meet, are hate me, and I don't know why. I don't understand how someone can like me, then turn around and hate me, even though I didn't give them any reason to. Maybe they never liked me to begin with. It could be that they found out I have Autism is something, and judgemental over it. Since being on the forums, I'm hoping that people would understand. They do, but not everyone.

Only a handful of people actually like me. Most of them are my sister's friends. There is one girl, who I am good friends with. She is easy to talk to. I don't have to worry about, that the next thing I say, maybe the wrong think. She is understanding and accepting. There should be more people like here. She is the easiest person I ever talked to. She is from the UK, but it's still good to have someone to talk to. I can never find anyone who lives in Nova Scotia. People I meet in Canada, are from the other side of the country, Ontario, at the closest, which is halfway across Canada.

There an other girl, who is easy to talk to. I talk to these people on WLM (MSN). One girl on Facebook, I talk to occasionally. Why do all the special people gotta live far away?

It reminds me of The Drew Carey Show, where he had a flashback of decades of people telling him "you'll find someone." About half a minute later, he is 40 and still doesn't have anyone.



I should have explained that, but there are plenty of guys who are dillweeds and have the worst attitudes about everything, but they have relationships, good jobs, nice houses, nice cars, etc. That's all I was trying to say to the people who say "change your attitude." It's not an oxymoron at all; it's in fact quite common. Unfortunately.