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The Science of Dating Website Profiles for Men

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Magnus_Rex
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25 Aug 2012, 1:28 pm

nessa238 wrote:
But what about talking to other shy people?

You could open a new profile and ask people on here for advice on how to respond


I think it is better for me to avoid doing that for now. The only time I fell in love for a girl was after being friends with her for about six months, which proves that I need to know the person before I even begin to seriously consider the possibility of dating her. Right now, I am back to not caring (much) about love. Either it is bound to happen someday or I will eventually completely stop caring about it. In any case, I will feel much better.


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nessa238
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25 Aug 2012, 1:29 pm

Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
I don't need to use the advice - I'm not male for a start. I was pointing out the ridiculousness of a good looking person thinking his success with women is down to his conversational skills and thinking that all men are capable of getting the same results, however they look. It's totally unrealistic, patronising and a bit cruel in my opinion.


I'm just a man trying to look at it from a positive perspective and no amount of words will make up for your negative spirit. So what would you prefer I do? tell the guys on here that it's hopeless? I simply don't believe that, you might believe that some people can't find success in love but I can assure you, many can. Come back when you are making a positive and noble effort without criticizing something for nothing.


I never said that at all, I said it's not fair to imply people can get the same level of success with varying parameters

So are you going to help Magnus Rex with his dating profile or not?



Stalk
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25 Aug 2012, 1:31 pm

Magnus_Rex wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
But what about talking to other shy people?

You could open a new profile and ask people on here for advice on how to respond


I think it is better for me to avoid doing that for now. The only time I fell in love for a girl was after being friends with her for about six months, which proves that I need to know the person before I even begin to seriously consider the possibility of dating her. Right now, I am back to not caring (much) about love. Either it is bound to happen someday or I will eventually completely stop caring about it. In any case, I will feel much better.


Come on man, damn it. It's not like there is a microphone in your ear. You just volunteered, don't back out now



Wolfheart
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25 Aug 2012, 1:32 pm

nessa238 wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
I don't need to use the advice - I'm not male for a start. I was pointing out the ridiculousness of a good looking person thinking his success with women is down to his conversational skills and thinking that all men are capable of getting the same results, however they look. It's totally unrealistic, patronising and a bit cruel in my opinion.


I'm just a man trying to look at it from a positive perspective and no amount of words will make up for your negative spirit. So what would you prefer I do? tell the guys on here that it's hopeless? I simply don't believe that, you might believe that some people can't find success in love but I can assure you, many can. Come back when you are making a positive and noble effort without criticizing something for nothing.


I never said that at all, I said it's not fair to imply people can get the same level of success with varying parameters

So are you going to help Magnus Rex with his dating profile or not?


So you are saying we should just tell everyone that isn't naturally good at creating a first impression or initial impression to just give up trying?



The_Face_of_Boo
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25 Aug 2012, 1:36 pm

I have realized that appearance is the key, hence why I made this advice thread:



http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt200381.html

nessa, you can see there on the last pages of the thread how horrible my okcupid results were when I was using my geekish-looking pics.

check the screenshots on

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postxf200381-0-390.html

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postxf200381-0-30.html

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postxf200381-0-90.html

and there were more there.



Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 25 Aug 2012, 1:40 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Wolfheart
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25 Aug 2012, 1:37 pm

I haven't neglected looks in this thread, I stated them as the first point by declaring that guys should go and improve their fashion, body and self appearance.



IrishTusk
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25 Aug 2012, 1:45 pm

Shame I never turn out well in photo's sad bit is am decent looking in real life get complimented on my looks and Accent -alot-. Take a photo of me and I look like Golum. That said I've had a fair bit of success on dating sites. I've met quite good looking local girls, Which surprises me as Scottish people in Fife are Fugly


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nessa238
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25 Aug 2012, 1:50 pm

Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
I don't need to use the advice - I'm not male for a start. I was pointing out the ridiculousness of a good looking person thinking his success with women is down to his conversational skills and thinking that all men are capable of getting the same results, however they look. It's totally unrealistic, patronising and a bit cruel in my opinion.


I'm just a man trying to look at it from a positive perspective and no amount of words will make up for your negative spirit. So what would you prefer I do? tell the guys on here that it's hopeless? I simply don't believe that, you might believe that some people can't find success in love but I can assure you, many can. Come back when you are making a positive and noble effort without criticizing something for nothing.


I never said that at all, I said it's not fair to imply people can get the same level of success with varying parameters

So are you going to help Magnus Rex with his dating profile or not?


So you are saying we should just tell everyone that isn't naturally good at creating a first impression or initial impression to just give up trying?


No I never said that. I said that how a person looks is going to be the main influencer of whether a person responds, whatever their conversation is like.



nessa238
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25 Aug 2012, 1:56 pm

Wolfheart wrote:
I haven't neglected looks in this thread, I stated them as the first point by declaring that guys should go and improve their fashion, body and self appearance.


It varies a lot the extent to which a person can improve themself though.

I just have a big problem with good looking people bestowing their wisdom on us 'less attractives' - it makes my teeth grind!

I want to see how much success they are get in old age!



nessa238
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25 Aug 2012, 2:00 pm

IrishTusk wrote:
Shame I never turn out well in photo's sad bit is am decent looking in real life get complimented on my looks and Accent -alot-. Take a photo of me and I look like Golum. That said I've had a fair bit of success on dating sites. I've met quite good looking local girls, Which surprises me as Scottish people in Fife are Fugly


I get opposite problem as the photo I use tends to get a lot of responses but then I feel like a fraud as it's a fluke 'good photo' lol

So I added a second more accurate photo last time and have had less responses but it presumably means people are responding to a more accurate portrayal which is better as more honest

I don't have anything in common with these people though so no point in taking it any further in my opinion.



Wolfheart
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25 Aug 2012, 2:01 pm

nessa238 wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
I don't need to use the advice - I'm not male for a start. I was pointing out the ridiculousness of a good looking person thinking his success with women is down to his conversational skills and thinking that all men are capable of getting the same results, however they look. It's totally unrealistic, patronising and a bit cruel in my opinion.


I'm just a man trying to look at it from a positive perspective and no amount of words will make up for your negative spirit. So what would you prefer I do? tell the guys on here that it's hopeless? I simply don't believe that, you might believe that some people can't find success in love but I can assure you, many can. Come back when you are making a positive and noble effort without criticizing something for nothing.


I never said that at all, I said it's not fair to imply people can get the same level of success with varying parameters

So are you going to help Magnus Rex with his dating profile or not?


So you are saying we should just tell everyone that isn't naturally good at creating a first impression or initial impression to just give up trying?


No I never said that. I said that how a person looks is going to be the main influencer of whether a person responds, whatever their conversation is like.


You would be assuming that everyone is shallow and that's not the case, sometimes it's about more than looks, it's about connection.



The_Face_of_Boo
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25 Aug 2012, 2:02 pm

Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
I don't need to use the advice - I'm not male for a start. I was pointing out the ridiculousness of a good looking person thinking his success with women is down to his conversational skills and thinking that all men are capable of getting the same results, however they look. It's totally unrealistic, patronising and a bit cruel in my opinion.


I'm just a man trying to look at it from a positive perspective and no amount of words will make up for your negative spirit. So what would you prefer I do? tell the guys on here that it's hopeless? I simply don't believe that, you might believe that some people can't find success in love but I can assure you, many can. Come back when you are making a positive and noble effort without criticizing something for nothing.


I never said that at all, I said it's not fair to imply people can get the same level of success with varying parameters

So are you going to help Magnus Rex with his dating profile or not?


So you are saying we should just tell everyone that isn't naturally good at creating a first impression or initial impression to just give up trying?


No I never said that. I said that how a person looks is going to be the main influencer of whether a person responds, whatever their conversation is like.


You would be assuming that everyone is shallow and that's not the case, sometimes it's about more than looks, it's about connection.


A connection that starts by thinking how hot you are.



nessa238
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25 Aug 2012, 2:02 pm

Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
I don't need to use the advice - I'm not male for a start. I was pointing out the ridiculousness of a good looking person thinking his success with women is down to his conversational skills and thinking that all men are capable of getting the same results, however they look. It's totally unrealistic, patronising and a bit cruel in my opinion.


I'm just a man trying to look at it from a positive perspective and no amount of words will make up for your negative spirit. So what would you prefer I do? tell the guys on here that it's hopeless? I simply don't believe that, you might believe that some people can't find success in love but I can assure you, many can. Come back when you are making a positive and noble effort without criticizing something for nothing.


I never said that at all, I said it's not fair to imply people can get the same level of success with varying parameters

So are you going to help Magnus Rex with his dating profile or not?


So you are saying we should just tell everyone that isn't naturally good at creating a first impression or initial impression to just give up trying?


No I never said that. I said that how a person looks is going to be the main influencer of whether a person responds, whatever their conversation is like.


You would be assuming that everyone is shallow and that's not the case, sometimes it's about more than looks, it's about connection.


Connection.... strongly influenced by looks too lol



nessa238
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25 Aug 2012, 2:03 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
Wolfheart wrote:
nessa238 wrote:
I don't need to use the advice - I'm not male for a start. I was pointing out the ridiculousness of a good looking person thinking his success with women is down to his conversational skills and thinking that all men are capable of getting the same results, however they look. It's totally unrealistic, patronising and a bit cruel in my opinion.


I'm just a man trying to look at it from a positive perspective and no amount of words will make up for your negative spirit. So what would you prefer I do? tell the guys on here that it's hopeless? I simply don't believe that, you might believe that some people can't find success in love but I can assure you, many can. Come back when you are making a positive and noble effort without criticizing something for nothing.


I never said that at all, I said it's not fair to imply people can get the same level of success with varying parameters

So are you going to help Magnus Rex with his dating profile or not?


So you are saying we should just tell everyone that isn't naturally good at creating a first impression or initial impression to just give up trying?


No I never said that. I said that how a person looks is going to be the main influencer of whether a person responds, whatever their conversation is like.


You would be assuming that everyone is shallow and that's not the case, sometimes it's about more than looks, it's about connection.


A connection that starts by thinking how hot you are.


Lol Exactly!



nessa238
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25 Aug 2012, 2:04 pm

Call me a cynic but I'm as guilty of it myself - I need a certain amount of attraction to a person to be interested in them for anything other than polite chat to while away the time.

But then if you show interest in a person you don't fancy they can think you do fancy them so it's not fair on them.

I've noticed men are far less likely to want to just chat - it all has to be premised on 'am I going to get a) sex or b) a girlfriend out of the effort I put in here?'

I'm not like that - if a person is saying interesting stuff I'll chat to them whatever they look like.
Physical stuff requires fanciability as well though.



Wolfheart
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25 Aug 2012, 2:08 pm

nessa238 wrote:
Call me a cynic but I'm as guilty of it myself - I need a certain amount of attraction to a person to be interested in them for anything other than polite chat to while away the time.

But then if you show interest in a person you don't fancy they can think you do fancy them so it's not fair on them.

I've noticed men are far less likely to want to just chat - it all has to be premised on 'am I going to get a) sex or b) a girlfriend out of the effort I put in here?'

I'm not like that - if a person is saying interesting stuff I'll chat to them whatever they look like.
Physical stuff requires fanciability as well though.


Yes but you're looking at it the wrong way, attraction isn't always visual, it can be based on body language, approach, context, humour and other factors as well. If that guy in the video can get a hot girl, I am sure 99% of the dudes on this forum can and plus what's wrong with them being positive instead of negative? they are more likely to have success with a positive attitude. Why do you assume that every guy has an ulterior motive?