to men who lost their virginity

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Adam82
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30 Oct 2012, 7:57 pm

RICKY5 wrote:
Adam82 wrote:
WantToHaveALife wrote:
Stalk wrote:
She knew I was horny, and she verbally told me what I can do :D


movies such as "The 40-year old Virgin" really piss me off


Yeah, especially so, as I'll be one in ten years. 3/4 of the way there.


Apart from griping about your situation, what do you plan to do about it?

You have a stable job and access to resources. Exploit it!


I don't have a job. Where did I say that? I used to have one. Haven't worked in three months though.

Do I know you from another forum?

I am not comfortable with the idea of paying a prostitute.



RICKY5
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30 Oct 2012, 8:29 pm

MXH wrote:
RICKY5 wrote:
Adam82 wrote:
WantToHaveALife wrote:
Stalk wrote:
She knew I was horny, and she verbally told me what I can do :D


movies such as "The 40-year old Virgin" really piss me off


Yeah, especially so, as I'll be one in ten years. 3/4 of the way there.


Apart from griping about your situation, what do you plan to do about it?

You have a stable job and access to resources. Exploit it!


Lets be honest, its what most of the people in that situation come here to. Then theres the ones who you give advice to and act like dicks. And the ones who refuse advice because theyre perfect and its the women that need to change


LOL! So true!



Adam82
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30 Oct 2012, 9:27 pm

If this problem (my dateless problem) is still persisting when i get to mid thirties (35 or so) i may have to reassess my moral standards. But for now, I can't give up ALL hope that I will find myself a nice woman, without being forced to pay for it.



WantToHaveALife
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31 Oct 2012, 10:06 am

Adam82 wrote:
WantToHaveALife wrote:
Stalk wrote:
She knew I was horny, and she verbally told me what I can do :D


movies such as "The 40-year old Virgin" really piss me off


Yeah, especially so, as I'll be one in ten years. 3/4 of the way there.


yeah it just goes to show you how males are far more pressured than females to have lost their virginity by a certain age



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31 Oct 2012, 2:49 pm

MXH wrote:

Lets be honest, its what most of the people in that situation come here to. Then theres the ones who you give advice to and act like dicks. And the ones who refuse advice because theyre perfect and its the women that need to change


This is wisdom here. I find it funny how accurate this is.


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WantToHaveALife
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02 Nov 2012, 4:31 pm

Blammo wrote:
MXH wrote:

Lets be honest, its what most of the people in that situation come here to. Then theres the ones who you give advice to and act like dicks. And the ones who refuse advice because theyre perfect and its the women that need to change


This is wisdom here. I find it funny how accurate this is.


i hate, despise, loathe being a virgin, although i feel i'm close to getting a job with the internship i've been doing lately for close to 2 months now, i really feel tempted to go see a hooker or escort



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05 Nov 2012, 7:40 pm

DerStadtschutz wrote:
wtfid2, what we're trying to tell you is that looks really don't matter all that much. Remember me telling you that before? There's a reason I told you that...

You might think you're good looking, and I can't say I'd call you ugly, but that's not all anyone cares about. It might be social awkwardness, or it might be the fact that you lie. You just admitted that if you lost your virginity you wouldn't have to lie about it anymore... Well, maybe that's the problem. Maybe they can just tell by the way you act around them. If you're nervous around girls, they can probably pick up on that. The problem with you most likely has nothing to do with your appearance but rather the way in which you present yourself, which then suggests to them that you're a virgin, so they ask... And when they ask, you lie. They most likely KNOW it's a lie, and they figure that if you can't be honest to them about that, then god only knows what else you might be hiding, so they decide that you can't be trusted, and they move on.

I think in all honesty, the issue isn't with being a virgin either. Women don't like when you lie to them. That's one problem that you absolutely CAN fix. When you lie about being a virgin, is it in your profile that you're some kind of player, do you brag about how many women you've supposedly had sex with, or do they come and ask you, and then you lie? I'm just curious, but either way, they hate being lied to. But if you brag and everything, they expect this certain type of guy, and when they meet you, they see right thru your BS because of your body language, nervousness/shyness, etc. You need to stop lying about it. That's step 1. As for step 2, you seriously might as well just find a hooker or something because it sounds to me like you just want to get laid at this point and don't really care for a relationship. And you shouldn't be pretending you want a relationship to get into a girl's pants. That's what makes them hate men and become bitter b*****s, and for a good reason.
i lie when girls ask on first dates about my longest relationships. I say around 6 months. I disagree that i should be honest. That is a deal breaker for most.
If you are suggesting a hooker you should reread my other posts bc you are not understanding my struggles.


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DerStadtschutz
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05 Nov 2012, 9:38 pm

wtfid2 wrote:
i lie when girls ask on first dates about my longest relationships. I say around 6 months. I disagree that i should be honest. That is a deal breaker for most.
If you are suggesting a hooker you should reread my other posts bc you are not understanding my struggles.


No, I understand your struggles just fine, but I think you cause them yourself. I saw that you outright rejected a girl who seemed very enthusiastic to meet you, and I also remember you talking about how your main priority seems to be physical appearance and not emotional attraction. That, and you seem to be on a quest to just get laid, but you're going about it in a way that makes no sense to me. If you just want laid, find a girl who is enthusiastic about being with you and go bang her, or go find a girl who just wants laid as well. The latter would be much better, because I don't think you should toy with someone's emotions just to get in her pants. that's not right, and it's a big part of what causes women not to trust men.

You've probably had just as many opportunities to get laid as I have, yet for some reason, you never act on it. You ask for advice, but you don't seem to ever actually take it. All I can say is you can either take our advice and see what happens. It might work, and it might not, but at least you tried and found out one way or the other... OR, you can continue to do what you're doing, which absolutely ISN'T working. To keep doing the same thing and expect a different result is insanity. If that's what you're going to do, then frankly, you have NO right to complain whatsoever.

So again, go find a hooker, or go to craigslist/adult friend finder and put up an ad/profile or respond to an ad/profile indicating that you just want to get laid. If you want a relationship, then go find one, but you can't complain about others being picky when that's exactly what you're doing. The most important thing you need to know is that you need to be HONEST. If you can't do that, then I guess you're just screwed. I don't know what else to tell you.

Looking the way I do and having a picture floating around the internet, who most people would consider an embarrassing photo(and every girlfriend I've ever had has seen it very early into the relationship), being honest is what's gotten me girlfriends, and it's what's gotten me laid. I'm not all that good looking. I'm a huge nerd, I tend to offend people by saying the wrong things all the damn time, I'm fat, and I'm Nintendo Kid... And yet I still manage to get laid. You, on the other hand, are not fat at all. From what I've read here, people tend to find you attractive. Your problem is INTERNAL, not EXTERNAL. The sooner you realize that and change your approach, the better.

None of this is meant to be offensive, so please don't take it that way. Be honest. If you can't be honest to get a chance with someone, then you don't want to be with that person anyway. How long can you keep lying? Sooner or later(and I'm guessing it's sooner, or you wouldn't be having this problem), they WILL figure out you lied to them. And then they sure as hell won't let you into their pants.



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05 Nov 2012, 10:20 pm

DerStadtschutz wrote:
wtfid2 wrote:
i lie when girls ask on first dates about my longest relationships. I say around 6 months. I disagree that i should be honest. That is a deal breaker for most.
If you are suggesting a hooker you should reread my other posts bc you are not understanding my struggles.


No, I understand your struggles just fine, but I think you cause them yourself. I saw that you outright rejected a girl who seemed very enthusiastic to meet you, and I also remember you talking about how your main priority seems to be physical appearance and not emotional attraction. That, and you seem to be on a quest to just get laid, but you're going about it in a way that makes no sense to me. If you just want laid, find a girl who is enthusiastic about being with you and go bang her, or go find a girl who just wants laid as well. The latter would be much better, because I don't think you should toy with someone's emotions just to get in her pants. that's not right, and it's a big part of what causes women not to trust men.

You've probably had just as many opportunities to get laid as I have, yet for some reason, you never act on it. You ask for advice, but you don't seem to ever actually take it. All I can say is you can either take our advice and see what happens. It might work, and it might not, but at least you tried and found out one way or the other... OR, you can continue to do what you're doing, which absolutely ISN'T working. To keep doing the same thing and expect a different result is insanity. If that's what you're going to do, then frankly, you have NO right to complain whatsoever.

So again, go find a hooker, or go to craigslist/adult friend finder and put up an ad/profile or respond to an ad/profile indicating that you just want to get laid. If you want a relationship, then go find one, but you can't complain about others being picky when that's exactly what you're doing. The most important thing you need to know is that you need to be HONEST. If you can't do that, then I guess you're just screwed. I don't know what else to tell you.

Looking the way I do and having a picture floating around the internet, who most people would consider an embarrassing photo(and every girlfriend I've ever had has seen it very early into the relationship), being honest is what's gotten me girlfriends, and it's what's gotten me laid. I'm not all that good looking. I'm a huge nerd, I tend to offend people by saying the wrong things all the damn time, I'm fat, and I'm Nintendo Kid... And yet I still manage to get laid. You, on the other hand, are not fat at all. From what I've read here, people tend to find you attractive. Your problem is INTERNAL, not EXTERNAL. The sooner you realize that and change your approach, the better.

None of this is meant to be offensive, so please don't take it that way. Be honest. If you can't be honest to get a chance with someone, then you don't want to be with that person anyway. How long can you keep lying? Sooner or later(and I'm guessing it's sooner, or you wouldn't be having this problem), they WILL figure out you lied to them. And then they sure as hell won't let you into their pants.
if you understood my struggles you would see that i dont just want sex and that getting a hooker would not be a solution for me...at-least not a permanent one. there are lots of dishonest cocsuckers getting laid everyday man.


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aspiemike
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05 Nov 2012, 11:02 pm

wtfid2 wrote:
if you understood my struggles you would see that i dont just want sex and that getting a hooker would not be a solution for me...at-least not a permanent one. there are lots of dishonest cocsuckers getting laid everyday man.


Let's paint a clear picture for you. All of your struggles aside. And I am sure you know why these "dishonest cocsuckers" are getting laid everyday. Truth is simple: these other guys are better at lying than you are and are able to get away with it. As Aspies, and other people on the autism spectrum have figured out by now, we are not very good at lying for the most part.
I admire the fact that some on here can get laid based on honesty, and it is actually the biggest reason I am getting some right now from a lady that I do like.



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05 Nov 2012, 11:09 pm

aspiemike wrote:
wtfid2 wrote:
if you understood my struggles you would see that i dont just want sex and that getting a hooker would not be a solution for me...at-least not a permanent one. there are lots of dishonest cocsuckers getting laid everyday man.


Let's paint a clear picture for you. All of your struggles aside. And I am sure you know why these "dishonest cocsuckers" are getting laid everyday. Truth is simple: these other guys are better at lying than you are and are able to get away with it. As Aspies, and other people on the autism spectrum have figured out by now, we are not very good at lying for the most part.
I admire the fact that some on here can get laid based on honesty, and it is actually the biggest reason I am getting some right now from a lady that I do like.
i dont think that is it either as i have always been a good manipulator. glad to hear you're getting some though..but i know girls will run when they heard i have never had a gf. a girl on okcupid ran when she saw on my match question the words am a virgin. If she knew i never kissed a girl she would have had a stroke. after some prodding she told me she stopped responding bc im a virgin so iy is not my interpretation..it is the truth.


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05 Nov 2012, 11:24 pm

Yeah, unfortunately "virginism" (bias against virgins) still exists, but it is worse than ever now. I remember about a week ago it came up that I'm a virgin and that I needed to lose my virginity as fast as possible. But the thing is, I don't care a lot about losing it. But the conversation kept going and eventually they said I should pay a hooker so I can lose it, because I'm supposedly pathetic for not having lost it yet.

You see the irony in that? Why is it that paying somebody to have sex with you is less pathetic than not really wanting sex that bad yet still being a virgin? One of the same people who brought it up kept bitching about how she hadn't had sex in 5 months. Who the hell cares? There are people who go 5 DECADES without doing it. I applaud those people for being that patient, even though they shouldn't have to be.


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06 Nov 2012, 9:19 am

WantToHaveALife wrote:
Blammo wrote:
MXH wrote:

Lets be honest, its what most of the people in that situation come here to. Then theres the ones who you give advice to and act like dicks. And the ones who refuse advice because theyre perfect and its the women that need to change


This is wisdom here. I find it funny how accurate this is.


i hate, despise, loathe being a virgin, although i feel i'm close to getting a job with the internship i've been doing lately for close to 2 months now, i really feel tempted to go see a hooker or escort


May I ask why? I'm a virgin, but don't give a damn about it.

I have a job, but not many friends and a severe form of agoraphobia. Those who actually go outside despite their social shortcomings have a much better then then I have...but why be angry on being a virgin?

At the end of the day, it's not exactly something that is necessary, it's merely an added bonus which most people seem to get...but it's not exactly something you need. Perhaps courtship if you feel you need someone there, but not sex....it's merely there for you to reproduce really with the added pleasure of it...which sucks since it's in our hormones.

If I had the choice, I'd rid of my testosterone just to ignore craving a relationship with sex and be happy about getting out more.


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06 Nov 2012, 1:19 pm

DialAForAwesome wrote:
Yeah, unfortunately "virginism" (bias against virgins) still exists, but it is worse than ever now. I remember about a week ago it came up that I'm a virgin and that I needed to lose my virginity as fast as possible. But the thing is, I don't care a lot about losing it. But the conversation kept going and eventually they said I should pay a hooker so I can lose it, because I'm supposedly pathetic for not having lost it yet.

You see the irony in that? Why is it that paying somebody to have sex with you is less pathetic than not really wanting sex that bad yet still being a virgin? One of the same people who brought it up kept bitching about how she hadn't had sex in 5 months. Who the hell cares? There are people who go 5 DECADES without doing it. I applaud those people for being that patient, even though they shouldn't have to be.
i dont have admiration for people who go 5 decades without sex for many reasons.
1-most of those people are doing so bc they CANT get laid. they are suffering not becoming actualized
2- I think being a VOLUNTARY virgin is ust as bad as being a slut.sex isnt bad and i think to be a healthy individual you should have sex around once a month. you dont need it everyday, but going so long without it even by choice suggests deeper issues. I think people who say ''i dont need sex'' are fools..and i resent the especially if they get sex.
3-een if you dont need sex why not try it once to see how it is? do you think you are better than me for not having it?(assuming i was not a virgin) when I say you I mean the general population, and me refers to the general non virgin pop.


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DialAForAwesome
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06 Nov 2012, 1:52 pm

wtfid2 wrote:
i dont have admiration for people who go 5 decades without sex for many reasons.
1-most of those people are doing so bc they CANT get laid. they are suffering not becoming actualized
2- I think being a VOLUNTARY virgin is ust as bad as being a slut.sex isnt bad and i think to be a healthy individual you should have sex around once a month. you dont need it everyday, but going so long without it even by choice suggests deeper issues. I think people who say ''i dont need sex'' are fools..and i resent the especially if they get sex.
3-een if you dont need sex why not try it once to see how it is? do you think you are better than me for not having it?(assuming i was not a virgin) when I say you I mean the general population, and me refers to the general non virgin pop.


I disagree with the first point. If they really wanted sex THAT bad, even if they b***h and moan about it, they'd find some way to do it, whether that be to screw a hooker or screw somebody they find unattractive. I mean come on, 50 years is a long time. If they can go that long without doing the deed, they deserve props.

The second point makes no sense to me. It's not as bad as being a slut. Being a slut means more chances for disease to be spread around, more unwanted children, and just a generally lackadaisical attitude about the act of sex itself. Being a voluntary virgin brings nothing but good if you think about it that way. Being a slut brings all sorts of terrible things that are frankly already rampant in today's society.

The third point is moot, because even though I can't get sex, I still don't want it bad enough to screw just any-old-body. If I wanted to do that, I'd have done it ages ago; just gotten it over with by hiring a hooker. I don't have to try it to know that if I went ahead and got a hooker, it'd be no fun and not worth it. I could have just used that money and bought a video game or some food instead. I don't think I'm better than anybody for being a virgin; it's actually the other way around. People who have had sex think they're better than virgins for doing so, and that's how it's been since the beginning of time.


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06 Nov 2012, 9:01 pm

wtfid2 wrote:
i dont have admiration for people who go 5 decades without sex for many reasons.
1-most of those people are doing so bc they CANT get laid. they are suffering not becoming actualized
2- I think being a VOLUNTARY virgin is ust as bad as being a slut.sex isnt bad and i think to be a healthy individual you should have sex around once a month. you dont need it everyday, but going so long without it even by choice suggests deeper issues. I think people who say ''i dont need sex'' are fools..and i resent the especially if they get sex.
3-een if you dont need sex why not try it once to see how it is? do you think you are better than me for not having it?(assuming i was not a virgin) when I say you I mean the general population, and me refers to the general non virgin pop.


Seriously? :roll:

Just... where did you get from that "healthy individual" stuff. Also, did you just call yourself an unhealthy individual? :lol:. There is something that you, and many people like you, don't seem to understand, and it is that not everybody wants the same things that you want. Maybe you wish you had sex once a month? Not everybody does. There are a lot of valid reasons not to. Sometimes there are deeper issues, but that doesn't necessarily mean that those issues are mental health problems as you make it sound like, or that they should be addressed and changed. I repeat it again so it maybe gets into your head this time, not everybody wants the same as you do. I'm starting to make this little theory about you, you want to have sex so much that you resent women who supposedly can get it at any time they want (while in truth having sex with the first stranger that hits on them is not what they want) and you resent those who say they don't need it but get it anyway (quoting you almost literally, you must hate that someone gets what you want so dearly and doesn't fully appreciate it right?)

Several people have already suggested that you should go see a hooker and get it over with. They could be right.


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