Neurotypical Women....

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Right on BlueMax.

Wolf, what on earth are you talking about? It is wrong to hurt another person in the way you did and it's utterly disgusting in its every possible aspect. You cannot state that "what happens, happens" when you are the acting force in hurting and manipulating someone. People, including both aspie and NT women have something called feelings. In no reality you have the right to manipulate, hurt and play with them in the way you did and then come here to make excuses about it and blame someone or -thing else for it.

You take absolutely no responsibility of your actions. This didn't happen because world is a "ruthless place" (which it does become with your example of behaviour) or because you are not able to calculate all the "numerous variables and factors" (such as you insult her = she gets hurt). You cannot pass your acts as simply something that "happens sometimes" because that's the kind of guy you are, but state that hey, you are still a good one. Her pain is real. Not due to her being "too emotional NT woman", but because she is a human being like the rest of us. And she is in pain because of your words and actions that you and you alone are responsible of. You did far more than simply "state your standards" and that is unacceptable in any measure.

I don't have a clue what kind of response you were expecting with posting this thread, but I think the message for you here has been clear enough. Yet, you still try to defend yourself and tell the others that they, and this girl, are in the wrong.

You scare me.... You really do.

Just did a cold approach number close on a very attractive girl.

Ryan
I also love the dordogne, I really love French culture and I'd love to someday trek the States well possibly both of them, Western Europe, the States and a few Asian countries..Do you have Facebook or something more convenient we could chat on?
Girl C
I deactivated Facebook but I have whatsapp, perhaps texting is better?
Ryan
Yes, texting seems fine by me, what's your number? You don't live very far from me, I live in [location] haha.
Girl C
Oh really? That's very close [number enclosed]

I'm not going to walk on egg shells with you Wolf, this is purely attention seeking, and I am surprised how people still take their valuable time, to feed into this ridiculous thread.

Not sure what the real problem is... if steroids, personality disorder, or something else.

It sure is: cruel, manipulative and infantile.

Much like almost all the posts you made in this thread, what does THIS have to do with the topic and how does it make your horrible actions any more acceptable? Is this some sort of self defence mechanism being triggered by your subconscious? You keep trying to divert attention away from what you did wrong with random discussion on how cruel the world is (no thanks in part to you if the OP is to be believed), and also start going off onto other topics. Look, Wolf, eventually people will tire of trying to point out to you what you did was wrong, and that doesn't mean this tactic worked. Are you even aware you are doing this?

I'm simply saying that people have moments of disarray when they say things they don't mean, I can treat women really well but I can't compromise my values. This girl was extremely dynamic and emotional, I should have approached the situation with more sensitivity, I know that.

I'll try to arrange a coffee with her so I can discuss to her why I said what I said.

Perhaps it would help you to get counselling in adult social skills to help with your interactions?
My eldest son was also very awkward and non-empathetic to girls when he became a teenager, and found it hard to see them as people rather than sexual conquests.
Hormones and insecurity can make it hard to see the other's point of view.

But you did mean those things right? If you didn't, then that means you yourself would have compromised on your own values. Whch is something you said you can't do here:


Said despite a few posts ago stating that people need to compromise (both parties) in a situation.


AFTER you did something wrong.


Well...it's a start.


By that you mean, try and manipulate her into making you feel less guilty about being a jerk to her? No Wolf, don't bother. You blew it, just let her go. If you must contact her make it an apology NOT an explanation. No "sorry i said it that way", no "maybe we got off on the wrong foot" "i didnt mean it but..." just "Sorry".

You are doing okay with other girls so just apologize to this one and move on would be what I would suggest.

I don't preach forgiveness, tolerance and sensitivity without practising it, I can stand by what I say, I make mistakes, I experiences trials and errors, I try to learn from them, that's all anyone can do..I'm not a perfect person but I don't claim to be.

It's so easy to play the "holier than thou" or point the finger, I'm not pointing the finger.

There are no legitimate explanations or justifications here. If you go to this coffee date with anything less the a genuine apology you'll just make things worse.


I've been feeling this way about the entire Love & Dating board to be quite honest. I'm sure there are far more productive things I could be doing than trying to explain simple concepts like "Hurtful things = Hurt feelings" to a roided up aspie wallowing in self denial........ but it's like a trainwreck.........I can't look away.

Congratulations, you're a shallow douchebag.
What's the point of this thread?

You actually are, especially with a thread title blaming the response on her being nt and not on how you have acted. And then with all these follow ups there just isn't anything else I can see that you could do worse than you've done already.

Last edited by BlueMax on 22 Mar 2013, 2:47 pm, edited 1 time in total.

But life isn't unfair neither is natural selection, nothing is fair and that's a reality we all must face. Why do looks, race, culture, accents, differences divide humanity and cause wars? People are always putting people down, humanity is out of touch and people are shallow.

People can grow stronger and overcome obstacles, we can be stronger but we have to believe in ourselves. Nobody ever won the gold medal by being content or satisfied, a good coach will tell the athlete he can run another mile even when his body can't run another step.

Last edited by Wolfheart on 22 Mar 2013, 2:46 pm, edited 1 time in total.

So wait Wolfheart, are you going to keep dumping girls just because you find a "hotter one"? Imagine with girls did the same to you and leave you for a guy who is better in bed or has a bigger ****? Wouldn't you feel worthless and emotional about it too? By that first converstion you posted, this girl had feelings for you and you left you on the basis of physical appearance. So you only acre about how a girl looks? Nothing about personality? Have you ever even been in true love before? I want to know.

I used to enjoy reading your posts, but no longer. I always knew you were into fitness and health but this is taking your obsession to a hurtful level. And how dare you present this as an NT issue! This would hurt anyone regardless of neurological disposition. I myself am a size 12 however I have a personal trainer with whom I work out with. I plan on getting into better shape-for myself. And you know what? I'd rather be with someone who met me at this size and loved me regardless.

It's fine if you have preferences. But it's not fine to hurt someone's feelings because of them.

Lots of respect lost today....