How can you get a girlfriend if you have aspergers syndrome?

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You do not become confident in yourself or comfortable with yourself by "learning" how to manipulate women into being attracted to you. No wonder men have so many issues these days..

Your confidence would increase regardless.
If you are using scripted routines then no you wouldn't become more comfortable with yourself. You will become more comfortable when you move past the basics and work on your natural game.

You're not making any point.. Your "natural game"? What the hell is that? You mean being yourself, and confident in that? That requires no PUA s**t.
I can't believe I'm actually replying to this crap. .

You're not making any point.. Your "natural game"? What the hell is that? You mean being yourself, and confident in that? That requires no PUA s**t.
I can't believe I'm actually replying to this crap. .

Natural game is when you are not using scripted routines or false DHVs (fake stories). I don't think you actually know what PUA is.
It isn't manipulation and lying. It is understanding the social dynamics and psychology. Stuff Aspies don't know on their own which unless otherwise learned will lead to Incel or rarely getting laid.

I know what PUA is. I'm sorry I don't know your terms like "natural game" aka being a douchebag.
You're in for a rude awakening one day. You and all the other virgins/neckbeards following douchebags that emotionally abuse women and sell it like a commodity.

Show me them and i will talk to them and get to know them and see how it goes. I will seriously Talk to any girl on the spectrum who is interested in me.

is their an aspy dating site?

You've been given some good advice in this thread OP (and I'm NOT talking about resorting to PUA tactics, that is some of the worst advice I've seen unless you want to end up old and alone - at best PUA tactics will find you a trophy wife). Make yourself a fun, interesting person to be around and forget about "finding a girlfriend". Get on with your own life, do interesting things, work on your conversational skills (for example "facepalm" is a pretty f*****g terrible response to sincere advice - every woman (and everyone else) reading the thread at that point thought "what a dick"), stop thinking in terms of "the best" and "scraping the barrel" and maybe, just maybe, you might then meet the occasional person who is interested.

edit: There are plenty of autistic men who have and/or have had awesome wives and girlfriends. I bet they didn't say "facepalm" when someone gave them sincere advice.

Last edited by invisiblesilent on 25 Nov 2013, 9:38 pm, edited 1 time in total.

The 3 girlfriends I had I met on forums. My 1st had sever dyslexia, ADHD & some minor OCD & we liked alot of the same shows(met on Comedy Central's forums, it was 11years ago when CC had forums). My 2nd girlfriend was an Aspie who I met on this forum by making a post here asking about how to find a companion & she replied that she was kind of looking for the same thing. The one I have now which is my 3rd messaged me after reading a lot of my posts. I posted aLOT here about being lonely & what I wanted & had to offer but I'm not like the stereotypical Aspie because I'm very emotionally supportive & love being close & affectionate with my partner & have other issues besides Aspergers. She's dealing with depression & I've been through that which is some of why I'm more sensitive & supportive & she liked more attention & is dependent & I am too. She may not be far enough on the spectrum to get an Aspergers diagnoses but she has some traits & her younger brother is a diagnosed Aspie.
I never had much luck with women offline or women on other forums or dating sites I think partly because of my various Aspergers issues & being more dependent & needy & depressed at times.

People are always stuck on somebody they can't have. Well, not always, but usually.

It's only after reading the replies since I posted that I noticed the OP's name. If that means what I think it does and it is reflective of your attitudes in life, there is your problem right there.

You said you have problems with emotional expression and body language?

Well work on it! I spent years working on facial expressions, body language, tone of voice, et cetera.

That's pretty much all I did from ages 16 to 18. It really paid off too.

I don't settle for "bottom of the barrel" as you described, which honestly is a very subjective term.

The problem I have is that I have great interactions with people who share my interests all the time and that never leads to anything. This makes me skeptical of that kind of advice.

Another normal person who is ignorant when it comes to those who have aspergers/autism. The typical "well it's no big deal for me (or someone else), so therefore, it shouldn't be an issue for anyone else in the world either, and any reason you give for having trouble is an 'excuse'" type attitude.

I wish normal people were capable of understanding autism and the fact that just because they don't experience something, that doesn't mean it doesn't exist. People who think that autism/aspergers is an "excuse" are completely ignorant in my opinion, and I surely hope that this is not another person with autism who said this because I would at least expect others with some form of autism to understand how hard it is to find a mate and the reasons why.

"If you really want a girlfriend/wife, you would get one."

If only it were that easy.

Sometimes normal people piss me off with their mindless thoughts and statements, and it sucks that a majority of society is ran by them. I even have people who think like this in my family.

I had to finally become a member of WrongPlanet just to address this post. I'm sick of people who don't get it and know nothing about it being quick to criticize and tell someone who is struggling and suffering that they're making excuses and basically *choosing* to live that way.

I could say more, but... there's really no point. I just hope that no one in my circle of friends are this ignorant when it comes to autism/aspergers, although I suspect many probably are since most of my friends are from the "normal people" side of the fence.

A lot of people simply criticize or don't understand PUA. If you think it's about being fake or doing things you don't want to do or manipulation, then you might want to do more research or learn to find the genuine PUA instructors who are actually good and aren't in it for the money. All I can say is that PUA/Dating Gurus have helped me change my life for the better, BIG time (and I'm sure it does the same for many others who aren't naturally attractive to women or people in general).

I've grown sick of a lot of a lot of the more modern PUA instructors and tactics, but at the same time, I have to admit that men who naturally possess PUA traits tend to have FAR MORE success with women than males with aspie traits. Can't blame women or men for the way things are and why because none of us designed this world or chose for it to operate the way it does.... Hate it or love it, nice guys do finish last (in MOST cases) and the more jerkish/bad boy behaviors are what work. It sucks, and people always deny it any way they can, but that's just the way it is.

My motto is do what works to get what you want in life.
Whether it be dressing and talking differently than you normally would when sitting in front of a hiring manager because you want him/her to choose you for the job or acting more financially responsible than you really are while renting/applying for an apartment/car, etc. to get approval or doing certain things to make yourself more attractive and earn a higher chance at attracting a woman of interest... You might as well do whatever is necessary to get what you want (especially considering the fact that you are ALREADY doing these things...)

Manipulation... Cheating.... Being Fake....etc., Call it what you want, but everyone (including you) are already doing it (especially more so if you work for sales or the media).