Female Pick-Up-Artists (PUA)

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Chin chin? That's an extremely poor quality brand of liquor over here, please tell me you mean something else

A friend of mine has the "b***h" book, she says she hasn't read it though, it was a gift from one of her friends. I'll ask her for more information. I read a bit of the book and it was entertaining; but if someone were to apply that to me I'd probably lose interest fast. I came to terms long ago with the idea that it is my obligation as a man to be the one doing the chasing, but trying to actively date takes a huge amount of time and energy I don't really so I don't do that often.

hurtloam, I see a future there.

Erm...Llama Llama?

Anyway, while we're talking about names...exactly what is a shatbat, pray tell? I won't tell you what I think it suggests...

The point of these books is not to snare 'any' man, it's to snare a sort of man. If you would walk away, then you were just not what she was looking for. Not the target.

meh.. anyhow, I just finished watching Love and Other Drugs - made me cry, a long time since a film did that - if you are in a rom com mood (with lots of explicit sex)

Another one I'd recommend is Silver Linings and another one with heavy sexual content would be My Awkward Sexual Adventure

all of them about screw ups who find it hard to have relationships ...

It makes sense if you actually put it like that, it would work like a filter and I'm all about filters

My name? The proper spelling seems to be Shazbot. But it sounded like Shatbat to me when I was like 12 and had to choose an screen name for whatever I did when I was 12, and picked that one and it has stayed with me since.
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vWB3czWRN1Q[/youtube]

I should add: the b*tch book is nowhere near as bad as The Rules. They are on different levels. When referring to manipulation done to the same extent as PUA, I was primarily referring to the rules.

Actually Smudge, I have had my girlfriends tell me that I do exhibit quite a bit of behaviour out of the b*tch book. But as she noted, it comes naturally due to bring my aspie self. Especially things like not giving up my time easily, spending too much time with them or not dropping everything and running if they ask me out last minute.

If I spend a lot of time with anyone, friend or more, it means they have to be really super awesome to warrant that.

And as for not knowing what to do: is go with what feels most natural to you. The right people tend to bring out good reactions naturally, while with the wrong ones it feels like trying to play live sized wizards chess - where you simply never know where you stand. If in doubt about a guy I would look at his actions and see which patterns come up.

If he's always trying stuff when he sees you but doesn't bother to call. Or if he does, it's solely to set something up for next time. Guys who are interested will call more often and sometimes for no reason than just to talk. If every interaction has a set outcome purpose - there's a good chance he's just trying to get laid, isn't serious, or isn't into you.

If he's always asking you out last minute for instance on a Friday or Saturday night every few weeks - then it's a good bet he's keeping you on the back burner and as insurance in case things with the main chick he's going after don't work out. If you make the mistake of sleeping with him, you would probably get regulated to his f*ck buddy instead.

I've never read PUA books nor I've never ever thought to spend a penny to buy a PUA book.

Yet, hmmmm, you WP girls all seem have read the Rules and the b***h. You all claim they didn't affect you in any way but hmm...who knows.

I never brought the books Boo. I was at a girlfriends house when I was a teenager, and had nothing to do back then with men, so I was curious - especially since the other girls and guys in my year level were already dating. She was much older than me and during multiple visits I ended up reading those two and others. I thought they were terrible at the time and my opinion of them hasn't changed much.

Stalk: getting laid, yes,

I think the female equivalent would be setting expectations too high, having "the talk", and generally trying to pressure or manipulate him into a relationship. Also a lot if women keep guys as back up or even just hanging around just in case too - which is pretty cruel sometimes. Some if them know they will never want to be with him but if someone cancels on her at last minute - she might call him and get him to take her out to dinner instead. It can also be used as another part of manipulating the main guy they are dating by giving him a feeling of competition. Sometimes the thread of competition will prompt him to ask her for a relationship when otherwise he never would have done so.

In that case you should really be scared - at that stage I was very interested and spending most of my time reading about nanotechnology.

Wow this Rules book is 4 stars on amazon and has a lot of positive reviews, and it's all hyped everywhere...more than any male PUA book ever.

Some of the common tricks some women do:

- Keeping a guy as a plan B.
- Mind games like distancing, reverse psychology, showing the "bad mood" and see how he handles it...
- Financial testings: How much is willing to date for a date, how likely to pay all bill on every date, his brand of shoes (on more than one occasion, I've heard women advising each other about observing shoes, its brand, how clean it is and how "valuable" it is)....etc
- Avoid to call the first date as date so they find an easy exist later; "oh, but it wasn't a date, It was just a friends thing" (between 2 people met on dating site, yeah riiight).

Both sexes do it, just for different reasons.
If that made you bitter about women then you can see how a women in the same position can easily become bitter about men.

And a lot of women do think that guys have the upper hand when it comes to dating. Most guys think women have the upper hand too. But thinking that the other side has the upper hard only tends to encourage exploitation and manipulation in a preemptive defensive move so you don't get screwed over. It also usually kills any formerly decent chances you had at being able to connect naturally with someone.