Guys only want one thing

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I don't want to have sex with you.

I see. I would agree that that is using you.

Eh, sorry to have not explicitly stated that you are clearly an exception to the rule, but you have said as much yourself. But as to stereotyping / trying to fit people into boxes; the thing is, I very likely have Aspergers, my brain always looks for patterns and tries to categorise and classify everything (and everyone) so can't really help that. I do try and give each individual I interact with as unbiased chance to show who they are as I possibly can, but it's difficult to not do any filtering at all. For example, if I am talking to someone who is clearly a male, I will unconsciously disregard any possible conversation starters on make up and other 'girly' topics. If I didn't do this, it would be impossible to interact with anyone.

Perhaps this is how many (note, I did not say most or all) male brains function, (I have certainly been told this is true by some friends/exes) they go around automatically sorting women out into "would have sex with" and "wouldn't have sex with" categories before they think anything else about them. The emotional connection isn't even the issue at this stage, it's just how a person assesses other people. Equally, in the NT world at least, men will assess other men for physical and status indicators that allow them to position themselves against that other man in terms of accepted social hierarchy rules. Unless they are gay, in which case, we go back to sexual appeal being the first assessment criteria.

This has been my observed experience. Of course there are exceptions, there are always exceptions to everything, but to not talk in generalisations when talking in general is paradoxical not to mention impossible.

I'll just leave this here. Note such a subreddit exists and read the content. This is a good thread, if more helpful for guys to avoid being self-pitying manipulators.
www.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/lmu0d/for_newbies_nice_guy_syndrome_what_it_is_and_why
HikariKun, you have a keen mind. As someone else said, set the bar high. Don't do anything you aren't 100% into. Build a relationship around shared values and shared appreciation(s). Finish college, and find a better environment. Some quality guys will still be available.

My apology; I have encountered people before who have refused to accept exceptions to general constructs, including telling me that I am lying about a particular position I have on a topic, claiming I am simply deluding myself (anything other than recognizing that as a legitimate and real position). I was not sure if you were one of these people and were claiming something similar to 'all men only want sex no matter what they say' due to the previously quoted statements.

I do certainly agree that a large portion of men, and humans in general, do appear to have sex as the core interest, but since I am one of the exceptions (however few we are) I have a personal vested interest in making sure that people do understand that not everyone fits into this mode of thinking (even when it may sometimes appear that everyone does), when this type of topic arises. I am very sensitive to when people project their own thoughts of how I must think or act onto me, particularly when it is outright incorrect, so this subject probably hits that nerve without much effort.

Sex is just icing on the cake. What I really want is a cuddle buddy. I want physical intimacy, just not the kind everybody assumes I want. When I am talking to a pretty girl, I don't really find conversations all that interesting, because all I am thinking about is kissing and hugging her.

Ii won't lie I want sex passion fire but I also want a companion who I can relate and talk with and share life with

I think a good way to try and some up what all-yall just said: "We all lust for love."

Did we ever decide btw, what the one thing was?

Sex ?
To borrow your power tools ?
Dinner ?
A wide screen TV ?
A restoreable example of their first car ?

This how many female brains functions too but they use more gentle term like "attractive" and "not attractive".

But the difference in (assumed generalisation) intent is completely different and the whole point. Women (generally speaking) look for a (short/long term) relationship whereas (allegedly) men are looking to get laid and put up with the relationship part of the deal because they have no choice.
There is a massive difference between the two approaches because what we are saying (and luckily we are not entirely correct) is that men view women as objects, whereas women view men as people. I think that's the issue being discussed here.

If we are gonna go extremely bitter, based on my obeservation: men see women as sex objects, women see men as money objects.

I think the whole idea here begins from a skewed (flawed) position. Like in war saying our side is the good guys and the other side is the bad guys.

Despite civilization, modernism, theologies, etc, we are still apparently just the most intelligent form of mammal, and have basic instincts as well as learned behaviors. But in this mix there are other basic motivations and driving impulses besides sex, and the individualism noteworthy in the human species and well as the great variety of environmental/experiencial factors makes for even more variety in drives and motives.

Some seek nurturing, some seek protection, some seek companionship, some seek solitude, some seek family, are just a few of the possibilities and we are not even getting to sex or the more twisted motives possible.

So I don't think it is even possible to say males or females only have one and the same thing on the mind. But if pressed to give the most correct answer, it has not yet been mentioned I believe, and would say the most common thing foremost in both men and women's minds is themselves.

Well Boo and Toy Soldier - those are fine points - for the PPR forum.
Here, we are trying to address OPs issue of being seen as a sex object at college and not knowing how to not be seen as a sex object

We are talking college kids here. It's not impossible that she can meet a guy who fits her criteria, but let's be honest, most will want mostly sex if not only sex. He who claims differently is a barefaced liar

I take your point, but consider that the group in question, 'college guys' may be misleading. Does it really really mean college guys who are agressively persuing the girls? What percentage is that of the total male student population at the school, including shy, not agressive, not interested guys, etc ?

Additionally, what about maturity differential (if you accept it exsists)? High School girls often date college aged guys, and college girls often date post grad aged guys.