Clothes and Fashion for attracting women

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AlexanderDantes
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22 Oct 2014, 5:39 am

Considering I found a blazer for ten pound, I think it is practical.

http://www.ebay.co.uk/itm/Men-Casual-Sl ... 5d49f862ac



yellowtamarin
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22 Oct 2014, 5:52 am

AlexanderDantes wrote:
Would you have sex with both?

It's not a case of looking fine or acceptable, Brian needs to rise above the competition with the tons of other guys he is competing against at online dating. He can't risk coming across as needy or boring, he needs to come across as sharp and ready.

That...depends who he is trying to attract. I think both those guys look great, if their outfit matches their personality then it's all good. They are projecting an image of who they are, and will attract girls who are attracted to that kind of person.



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22 Oct 2014, 6:00 am

Just wear clothes that fit. Jeans with a nice shade, that don't sag or look loose, shirts/light jackets that sit at your waist. I wore nothing but crap single-shade jeans and large hoodies my whole life. I didn't realize how it affected my game, but I wore them because they were simple and plain. I guess that means I'm simple and plain.

Look, I couldn't give a damn about fashion at all, never have, since I realized I was so frumpy I changed to fit the bare minimum of society's standards. I wear what I like and what fits. If you honestly aren't sure, ask someone cool. I had my cool friends take me to H&M and I bought a few outfits.

Either way, at the end of the day, just be yourself. I'm just as comfortable going out wearing band hoodies. I don't care.


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22 Oct 2014, 6:06 am

Brianruns10 wrote:
I think I've reached the point I need to change my appearance in order to do better at attracting women. But I've literally never bought clothes for myself, only what I get for Christmas each year, and even then, some of what I have goes back to high school...ten years now.

I don't know where to begin. What kind of clothes do I wear that tell the opposite sex I'm confident and successful and worthy?


Beside my everyday standard outfit (sneakers, jeans, bandhoodie) I miss the ability to know, what kind of cloths fit together and looks good when combined. I help myself with the cloths the puppets in the store wore, or that are shown combined in the catalogues. Usually these combinations were done by professionels, so they will likely look well together.

Beside that I´d simply go for the "style" that you are comfortable with. So if you wanna have skater/punk style copy shop-puppets and prospects from typical skater/punk shops, if you feel more into the geeky-style then do so with geeky shops etc...

@Dantes You really should take in mind, that it´s all about the kind of girls, that he is interested. As example if I agreed in meeting someone for a standard coffee chit-chat, to get to know him, and that guy approaches with an suit... It´s not that I would think in generally negative about that, but if someone does average "coffee-hello-meetings" in suits, that means to me, that this persons cares for cloths of that kind very much. Which means, that this topic might be rather important for him, and might as well be rather important for him, when it´s about his female partner. So as a "I dont really give a f**k about my everyday cloths." person, I would not think, that an relationship had a chance on long terms. Not because of anything being good or bad, but simply because of us being to different.

So if you are interested in meeting girls, that care very much for that kind of style, and do so themselves. Then a suit is a good thing. But for other girls, you might just be overdoing it, in a way, that they dont feel comfortable, because of them feeling the need to "dress up" to meet the opposites standard.



Brianruns10
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22 Oct 2014, 9:57 am

I just worry I run the risk of seeming fraudulent. Because I'm not wise to fashion, and if I could get away with it, I'd just wear the same thing every day and not worry. Frankly it kinda makes me sick the thought of having to conform to society's expectations, but the fact is I need to find someone, and I know I've gotta make a good impression to prove on a first date that I am worthy of her.

Actually I've always loved the look of a vest and tie...kinda Mad Men-ish. But I never dared try it for fear that I'd be called out as a phony or a poseur, because people just don't wear that stuff much. And can I actually pull off that look, since I'm not very good looking to begin with? Is the vest and tie look only for male models and actors, and not me?

To see what I have to work with, here's my OKC profile:

OKCupid profile



Eureka13
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22 Oct 2014, 10:27 am

The main reason I contacted my late fiancé was because in his profile he said "I don't own a tie. If you don't like jeans and t-shirts, skip this profile." He wasn't kidding. Not only did he only wear jeans and t-shirts, they were pretty raggedy, and some of his t-shirts were downright offensive. However, since I had the same kind of "style," he was a perfect fit for me. Granted, for our first date, he wore his "good" clothes - jeans with no holes in them, and a plain long-sleeved t-shirt - no offensive pictures or sayings on it. :D

I agree with the advice to dress in what you're comfortable in, i.e., what you normally wear, because if you're not comfortable you can't possibly project "confidence and success" no matter what you're wearing. Also, as Schneekugel said, if you're not into fashion, but pretend you are for a date, you may not send the right message about what kind of person you really are, thus failing to attract women who are truly compatible with you.



Nichard
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22 Oct 2014, 5:25 pm

Do your hair! It really grabs girls' attention and shows that you care about how you look. It puts you far above the average guy.
Don't be average! Jeans and a t-shirt will get you NOTHING. If you don't stand out from the crowd, you'll never be noticed.
You look like a fit guy; use it! Wear slimmer, tighter clothes to show off what you have.
Button-ups look great on ANY guy, so make them a key part of your wardrobe.
Above all, how you ACT is what attracts women. If you can't do this naturally, be careful trying.
Be: CASUAL
CONFIDENT
CLASSY
CALM-Keep your cool. Don't get mad, don't be sad, don't be nervous, and do NOT make it obvious if you think a girl is a goddess. All the other guys will stare at her, pay attention to her, and try to get her number. She tunes those guys out, so don't be those guys!
Good luck, and don't forget to have fun.



yellowtamarin
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22 Oct 2014, 6:49 pm

Untuck your shirt, if there's no particular reason you tuck it.



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22 Oct 2014, 7:39 pm

Brianruns10 wrote:
I just worry I run the risk of seeming fraudulent. Because I'm not wise to fashion, and if I could get away with it, I'd just wear the same thing every day and not worry. Frankly it kinda makes me sick the thought of having to conform to society's expectations, but the fact is I need to find someone, and I know I've gotta make a good impression to prove on a first date that I am worthy of her.

Actually I've always loved the look of a vest and tie...kinda Mad Men-ish. But I never dared try it for fear that I'd be called out as a phony or a poseur, because people just don't wear that stuff much. And can I actually pull off that look, since I'm not very good looking to begin with? Is the vest and tie look only for male models and actors, and not me?

To see what I have to work with, here's my OKC profile:

OKCupid profile


I'm not a woman, so feel free to take my opinions with a grain of salt. I think that your fashion sense isn't bad - I certainly don't think it's hurting you all that much. With that said, I wouldn't wear that striped yellow shirt again ;). It looks a bit too accountant-y. I actually own the exact same shirt, but I haven't worn it for like 7 years.

Have you considered contacts, or a different style of glasses frame? It could just be me, but I don't think that those glasses compliment your face at all, and I think that changing that might help.

PS: You have awesome running times - I know someone who does iron mans and way slower than that!



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22 Oct 2014, 8:28 pm

Stargazer43 wrote:
Brianruns10 wrote:
I just worry I run the risk of seeming fraudulent. Because I'm not wise to fashion, and if I could get away with it, I'd just wear the same thing every day and not worry. Frankly it kinda makes me sick the thought of having to conform to society's expectations, but the fact is I need to find someone, and I know I've gotta make a good impression to prove on a first date that I am worthy of her.

Actually I've always loved the look of a vest and tie...kinda Mad Men-ish. But I never dared try it for fear that I'd be called out as a phony or a poseur, because people just don't wear that stuff much. And can I actually pull off that look, since I'm not very good looking to begin with? Is the vest and tie look only for male models and actors, and not me?

To see what I have to work with, here's my OKC profile:

OKCupid profile


I'm not a woman, so feel free to take my opinions with a grain of salt. I think that your fashion sense isn't bad - I certainly don't think it's hurting you all that much. With that said, I wouldn't wear that striped yellow shirt again ;). It looks a bit too accountant-y. I actually own the exact same shirt, but I haven't worn it for like 7 years.

Have you considered contacts, or a different style of glasses frame? It could just be me, but I don't think that those glasses compliment your face at all, and I think that changing that might help.

PS: You have awesome running times - I know someone who does iron mans and way slower than that!


Man...I thought my glasses were one of the things that worked for me. I can't do contacts, because I look really ugly without glasses. I need them to look halfway decent. What else could I do you think? I can't stand square black frames..



AlexanderDantes
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22 Oct 2014, 10:57 pm

Brianruns10 wrote:
Stargazer43 wrote:
Brianruns10 wrote:
I just worry I run the risk of seeming fraudulent. Because I'm not wise to fashion, and if I could get away with it, I'd just wear the same thing every day and not worry. Frankly it kinda makes me sick the thought of having to conform to society's expectations, but the fact is I need to find someone, and I know I've gotta make a good impression to prove on a first date that I am worthy of her.

Actually I've always loved the look of a vest and tie...kinda Mad Men-ish. But I never dared try it for fear that I'd be called out as a phony or a poseur, because people just don't wear that stuff much. And can I actually pull off that look, since I'm not very good looking to begin with? Is the vest and tie look only for male models and actors, and not me?

To see what I have to work with, here's my OKC profile:

OKCupid profile


I'm not a woman, so feel free to take my opinions with a grain of salt. I think that your fashion sense isn't bad - I certainly don't think it's hurting you all that much. With that said, I wouldn't wear that striped yellow shirt again ;). It looks a bit too accountant-y. I actually own the exact same shirt, but I haven't worn it for like 7 years.

Have you considered contacts, or a different style of glasses frame? It could just be me, but I don't think that those glasses compliment your face at all, and I think that changing that might help.

PS: You have awesome running times - I know someone who does iron mans and way slower than that!


Man...I thought my glasses were one of the things that worked for me. I can't do contacts, because I look really ugly without glasses. I need them to look halfway decent. What else could I do you think? I can't stand square black frames..


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The_Face_of_Boo
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23 Oct 2014, 3:56 am

Always the shirt above the short, don't put it inside the short.



yellowtamarin
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23 Oct 2014, 4:03 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Always the shirt above the short, don't put it inside the short.

I sed dat one already :D



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23 Oct 2014, 4:04 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Always the shirt above the short, don't put it inside the short.

I sed dat one already :D


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23 Oct 2014, 5:25 pm

If you don't feel confident enough to pull off something "edgy" or something that stands out go with with a classic "timeless" look - neutral which shouldn't equal boring, be it jeans and a button up shirt or a more discrete suit. Best advice given here is well fitting clothes, this can make a world of difference. If you can't afford tailored just shop around, thrift stores included until you find something that fits you properly. Boo made some good points on what to avoid.

And something else, you should still feel good and at ease in those clothes otherwise you might as well not bother. I still remember one night out, there were some fancy dress events in the city - I can't remember why - and I saw a young guy wearing a very well made, well-fitted Victorian suit, watch chain, top-hat, cane and all, looking so embarrassed and self-conscious it was a shame, 5 minutes later we pass another dude wearing a pink bathrobe with fluffy slippers, king of the ball surrounded by girls, he was enjoying it and making it work so well. Some people can actually pull off the squid hat and long beard :lol:

To sum up, well-fitting clothes in which you feel comfortable/yourself. Trends and eccentricities or strong styles are best suited for people who feel very confident with their bodies and themselves, no offence meant here, I only react to what you wrote earlier.


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23 Oct 2014, 8:25 pm

BenderRodriguez wrote:
If you don't feel confident enough to pull off something "edgy" or something that stands out go with with a classic "timeless" look - neutral which shouldn't equal boring, be it jeans and a button up shirt or a more discrete suit. Best advice given here is well fitting clothes, this can make a world of difference. If you can't afford tailored just shop around, thrift stores included until you find something that fits you properly. Boo made some good points on what to avoid.

And something else, you should still feel good and at ease in those clothes otherwise you might as well not bother. I still remember one night out, there were some fancy dress events in the city - I can't remember why - and I saw a young guy wearing a very well made, well-fitted Victorian suit, watch chain, top-hat, cane and all, looking so embarrassed and self-conscious it was a shame, 5 minutes later we pass another dude wearing a pink bathrobe with fluffy slippers, king of the ball surrounded by girls, he was enjoying it and making it work so well. Some people can actually pull off the squid hat and long beard :lol:

To sum up, well-fitting clothes in which you feel comfortable/yourself. Trends and eccentricities or strong styles are best suited for people who feel very confident with their bodies and themselves, no offence meant here, I only react to what you wrote earlier.


I've literally outsourced the choosing of cute, stylish clothes to 1) my v stylish BFF and 2) the nice, free personal shopper lady at Lord a& Taylor (call ahead, tell them your size & price range & occasion and they'll pre-select clothes for you to try on). I hate shopping, left to my own devices all my clothes would be black and boring and this system ensures I look reasonably put together. Every 12-18 mos the "work" clothes get downgraded to weekend wear and replacement as purchased, that are picked by BFF & the dept store lady.