GiantHockeyFan wrote:
sly279 wrote:
what does $20 a month get me at eharmony girls rejecting me and depression. yeah no thanks. okcupid is way better and though it still has the above things atleast I don't pay them money to get rejected and in harmonies case told I'm unmatchable.
Well, for me I got 15-20 dates (and about 8-10 second & third dates), 2 relationships and now one that is probably going to lead to marriage (yes, I say that after just 3 months as she is a dream catch). Sure, online dating is far from ideal but OKCupid got me one crazy BPD relationship and two first dates. The simple fact is that while "free" sounds good in theory it just promotes a throwaway mentality. The women on eHarmony know that by paying you are serious about finding love and are less likely to be a predator and I can tell you from multiple women I dated that
women vastly outnumber men! I still hate that you cannot tell who is a paid subscriber though.
You are going to get rejected a lot no matter if you are God himself so you might as well get used to it. Doesn't matter what site you use: many online daters are simply very ambivalent and it has nothing to do with you at all. I spend hundreds of dollars on eHarmony over the years, faced more rejection than I did in school and it looks like it was WELL worth it. We would have never met in real life and I would have assumed she was married anyway. Oh, and I should also mention she was a flex match who did NOT meet my age parameters so keep an open mind.
eharmony is for upper middle class people. not poor lower class people. by paying it shows you ahve a good job and thats what the women there want.
from what I gather you have a decent job and look decent. so it works for you as you are the client tale. I would go homeless and starve paying for eharmony and they'd reject me because I have no job unless a decent one. glad it works for you and I'm sure it would work wonders for any other upper/middle class apsies. its just not for anyone not working a decent job.
as for okcupid being throw away. all dating sites are like that. people view dating sites the same as window shopping. they have tons of options so they can play around til they find the one they like best, problem is then another one comes they like slightly better and so on. still plenty of people have had just as good results from okcupid as eharmony. I got 7 dates from okcupid
if eharmony really wanted to attract people like me they'd lower their prices, but they wont' they're a upper middle class dating site. christian singles is a upper middle class site for christians. they work similar to gyms. get people to pay super high prices and hope they have low success rates or they'll stop paying. if everyone on eharmony found marriage then the site would go out of business its in their best interest to keep people single.
oh since people pay so much to be there, it should allow those they message to reply for free. maybe they'd scare less people away from their site.
there was one site that worked that way if a subscribed member messaged you you could talk back. since why pay s**t ton of money if you can't talk to them.
My sister met her now-husband on eharmony last year -- with a coupon it cost her less than $60 for three months. Seems reasonable to me.
Expecting a potential date to be self-supporting isn't unreasonable. It's also not the same thing as expecting a potential date to be rich, pay for everything and have a polo pony existence.
23 May 2015, 1:51 pm
