Polyamory: Someone Please Help Me Understand

Page 4 of 8 [ 122 posts ] Go to page Previous 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 Next

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

14 Aug 2015, 5:19 pm

Polyamorous people are all over. They tend to be more cautious in small towns, though.

I don't think it's really very common, actually, even in big cities.

nurseangela
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 27 Nov 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,017
Location: Kansas

14 Aug 2015, 5:23 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:

Polyamorous people are all over. They tend to be more cautious in small towns, though.

I don't think it's really very common, actually, even in big cities.

It must be common enough that my Aspie friend is into it. I don't know that many people.

_________________
Me grumpy?
I'm happiness challenged.

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.

kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

14 Aug 2015, 5:30 pm

I would estimate about 1 or 2 out of 10 people are into polyamory as a philosophy.

I wouldn't be surprised if the figure turns out to be less than 1 in 10.

Many more people cheat, though.

sly279
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Dec 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 16,181
Location: US

14 Aug 2015, 5:47 pm

nurseangela wrote:

kraftiekortie wrote:

Polyamorous people are all over. They tend to be more cautious in small towns, though.

I don't think it's really very common, actually, even in big cities.

It must be common enough that my Aspie friend is into it. I don't know that many people.

being into it and it being common are differnt'
just beause hes into it dont' mean he'll ever get to do it.

like people into bsdm. or petplay.

did he say he thinks its an ok thing or that hes personaly wants to do it?

I think its ok people should be able to do what they want so if asked what do i think of it I'd say its ok. though I personally don't get it nor would I want to take part in polyamory

kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

14 Aug 2015, 5:56 pm

BSDM: Bondage, Sadist, Discipline, Masochist.

nurseangela
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 27 Nov 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,017
Location: Kansas

14 Aug 2015, 5:57 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:

BSDM: Bondage, Sadist, Discipline, Masochist.

I'm talking to my Aspie friend now. Should I ask him about this stuff too?

_________________
Me grumpy?
I'm happiness challenged.

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.

nurseangela
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 27 Nov 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,017
Location: Kansas

14 Aug 2015, 5:59 pm

sly279 wrote:

nurseangela wrote:

kraftiekortie wrote:

Polyamorous people are all over. They tend to be more cautious in small towns, though.

I don't think it's really very common, actually, even in big cities.

It must be common enough that my Aspie friend is into it. I don't know that many people.

I'm sorry I got mad at you Sly. Do you accept my apology?

_________________
Me grumpy?
I'm happiness challenged.

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.

kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

14 Aug 2015, 6:03 pm

I would say probably not, Angela--unless you're really curious.

If he's into it, he might try to get you into it.

Many people like to "role play," some of which might involve a light form of BSDM.

I don't consider BSDM an Aspie thing, either.

nurseangela
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 27 Nov 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,017
Location: Kansas

14 Aug 2015, 6:19 pm

Ok. My Aspie friend says he believes in swinging with no strings attached. (I'm still not done drilling him with questions).

_________________
Me grumpy?
I'm happiness challenged.

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.

kraftiekortie
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 4 Feb 2014
Gender: Male
Posts: 87,510
Location: Queens, NYC

14 Aug 2015, 6:21 pm

I think you know the deal.....this guy doesn't want commitment.

But, somehow, deep inside, there's a challenge to this guy.

In reference to BSDM, I don't think most people are into the hard-core stuff (e.g., whipping, the rack, "water sports"), though quite a few are into the softer aspects of it (e.g., spanking games, role-playing, nipple-biting).

androbot01
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 17 Sep 2014
Age: 54
Gender: Female
Posts: 6,746
Location: Kingston, Ontario, Canada

14 Aug 2015, 9:12 pm

nurseangela wrote:

kraftiekortie wrote:

BSDM: Bondage, Sadist, Discipline, Masochist.

I'm talking to my Aspie friend now. Should I ask him about this stuff too?

Look, I think you are letting back and white thinking get the best of you. Just because he thinks it's okay, doesn't mean he'll do it. I think lesbianism is okay, but I'm not going to have sex with a woman.
Also, do you know that he is interested in you romantically? If he isn't are you still interested in the friendship? Because friends can be hard to come by and are never perfect.

sly279
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Dec 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 16,181
Location: US

14 Aug 2015, 10:14 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:

BSDM: Bondage, Sadist, Discipline, Masochist.

i thought it was all about Bondage.
I don't know what sadist or masochist is but the words sound scary.

kraftiekortie wrote:

I could maybe spank, but I'd prefer not to

role play and dress up is BSDM?
I can't do things that hurt the person I love.
I'm into mild pet play. but like with everything I don't really fit in to the group of people. I always seem to be odd one out with everything.

sly279
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 11 Dec 2013
Age: 36
Gender: Male
Posts: 16,181
Location: US

14 Aug 2015, 10:21 pm

nurseangela wrote:

I'm sorry I got mad at you Sly. Do you accept my apology?

in general or did i do something in this topic?

nurseangela wrote:

Ok. My Aspie friend says he believes in swinging with no strings attached. (I'm still not done drilling him with questions).

as in he wants to do it. probably need to ask would you prefer to swing?
i know with me that helps. I do hope I never gave people the wrong idea with somthing.

if hes like me and a bunch of aspies do be careful what and how you ask stuff, we'll give you honest answers to the best of our abilities. so 1. you may get answers you didn't want to know, 2. we may answer truthly but wrong.

like if you ask me if I support abortion rights I'd say yes. but I think abortion is murder, I just support people having the option to do it. theres also cases where its needed. though who am I to judge if someone needs somethign or not. I would not be with a woman who would abort though. anyways if just answered yes then some people might assume I myself would be ok with abortions in person level.

if he is for swinging then hes not for you. swinging sounds disgusting and horrible to me. mean on some level when horny the sex sounds nice but i could never do it and normally would find it disgusting. also i'm not poly so i would see it as cheating and disloyal it would break my heart if i had a gf and she did that stuff.

RushKing
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 16 Oct 2010
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,340
Location: Minnesota, United States

14 Aug 2015, 11:38 pm

nurseangela wrote:

There's no difference between polyamory and polygamy in my mind. Most women cannot keep feelings out of the situation when sex is involved. As an example say that me and my Aspie friend were married and we did this polyamory. I would have feelings for every guy I slept with otherwise I'm not doing it. Thing is, if I'm also not getting my emotional needs met from my Aspie friend/husband (which is probably truer than not) then I'm going to be spending more time with the men I feel a connection with and I may also eventually leave my Aspie friend/husband since I can get all of my needs met with another man. That's the problem that's going to be encountered if NT women are involved. Why would a man want to take that risk? Aspies have a low rate of marriages lasting as it is.

Well I personaly don't believe in marriage to begin with. This dosn't mean i'm against commitment.

I think I would have more opportunities if polyamory was mainstream. I fall in love with women with boyfreinds and I end up getting hurt very bad because of monogamy. Too many people who don't apear to be naturaly monogamous are in monogamous relationships for some reason.

nurseangela
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 27 Nov 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,017
Location: Kansas

15 Aug 2015, 12:46 am

sly279 wrote:

nurseangela wrote:

I'm sorry I got mad at you Sly. Do you accept my apology?

in general or did i do something in this topic?

nurseangela wrote:

Ok. My Aspie friend says he believes in swinging with no strings attached. (I'm still not done drilling him with questions).

I meant I'm sorry for saying what I did about your negativism. I do like you as a person. It just bothers me when someone keeps saying bad things about themselves.

_________________
Me grumpy?
I'm happiness challenged.

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.

nurseangela
Veteran
Veteran

Joined: 27 Nov 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 8,017
Location: Kansas

15 Aug 2015, 12:50 am

Me and my Aspie friend had a good talk. He's never done any swinging and wouldn't bring it up if his gf/wife didn't want to do it. It was just a thought he had.

_________________
Me grumpy?
I'm happiness challenged.

Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 83 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 153 of 200 You are very likely neurotypical
Darn, I flunked.

Page 4 of 8 [ 122 posts ] Go to page Previous 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8 Next

Jump to:

Polyamory: Someone Please Help Me Understand Post Reply New Topic

Polyamory: Someone Please Help Me Understand