Feeling undatable

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They would become affectionate towards me, say inappropriate things to me and come off as desperate when they had just met me. I didn't mean it like they were just socially awkward.

I often worry about this
What if I'm like that . What's the timeline for too soon. Im too romantic, I often get easily attached to people then others. I'm clingy, but i dont know if too much or too little as I also worry I'd be too distant.

Effectionate like showing interest or like trying to kiss just after meeting
Inappropriate like sex stuff?

Was it like they just walked up and started doing it?

Sorry if it's lot of questions I'm just worried people will call me creepy. I do try to avoid looking at or talking to women though so hopefully that helps.

I don't think seeming younger than you are would creep guys out. Soft voices can make guys feel like they don't exist. They might think subconsciously you are insubstantial, less tangible and real, and this makes them feel unreal and questions their self belief.
Doesn't have to go this way though, it depends on how you interpret what's going on.
Feel free to ignore my babble if it sounds stupid.

It doesn't sound stupid. It think it might help a me little to see how others might perceive me. It might explain why some people are disrespectful towards me or why the few guys who seem interested in me are self conscious.



I meant like physical affection like holding hands ect. Especially when they would insist.

I've never held hands really. Im not sure how one initiates it. For kissing I always say asked, same for hugs.

You seem stable to me. Though I've read your posts on here I'm not sure how you come off in person , but to me that wouldn't matter because of here. Like i dont know I feel I can get to know people thru text and if they were shy in person it'd be ok because I already know them, that's why I like online dating and wished it'd worked.

I think the guys are missing out, you seem like a catch.

Glad it doesn't sound stupid. I gotta go out now, maybe talk about it some more soon.

Yeah, I notice that some girls like guys who are already with someone. I've liked guys who were already taken, but that wasn't the reason why I liked them. Sometimes I think I would feel most comfortable getting to know someone without very many other people knowing about it so I wouldn't have to worry so much about the games and the bullying.

Have you tried online dating?

Yes, but most of the guys who were interested seemed creepy and maybe even predatory. A lot of the ones that I mentioned before were from dating sites.

What is your idea of predatory or creepy?

When someone becomes physically affectionate when I just meet them or insists to be. Also, if they say things that are inappropriate.

When I think about being in a relationship with someone I feel like they'll leave me. Sometimes I just feel too dumb and unlikable.

There are many guys out there who are gentlemen....who will wait a while before they attempt any sort of physical intimacy. You stand a better chance to meet these guys, probably, through some friend of a friend, rather than online dating.

If you do online dating, you should explicitly state that you're into "friends first," and not into physical intimacy, or even a "relationship," right away.

I use to have friends that weren't very nice to me at all. When they would try to match me up with someone there seemed to be an ulterior motive behind it because they would always try to match me up with their exes. Then there's also been times where someone would mention it once and I was interested, but then they would never talk about it again. There was this one time though my roommate genuinely wanted me to meet this guy she knew and I was kind of hesitant though and she didn't really talk about it anymore after that. I only hang out with one other person besides her that isn't family so I don't have a very big social circle.

If I did meet someone though, I feel like if they saw the way other people treated me and noticed my lack of common sense then they wouldn't see me as an equal and would start to feel sorry for me.

It seems like you are dealing with a lot of anxiety and fears of failure which in turn are feeding this negative self image. You don't come across as lacking common sense to me. If anything your posts show someone who is very observant and self-conscious. Probably the best thing I can tell you is this: Don't be afraid of failure, rather learn from it for the next time. If certain types of people seem to be more pitying of you then make note of their behaviors and use that to souse out the ones you meet later on. Keep putting yourself out there because not doing so is the guaranteed way to fail.

I know it's hard having a small social circle as I too have to deal with this. I pretty much don't have friends around here, the closest being a few clerks from businesses that I frequent. You might try and find a local group of people that share some of your interests and either meet someone there or through friends that you make in those groups. Meetup.com can help in this regard.

It seems like in real time I don't have as much common sense though. I usually try to avoid the people that act depressed and feel sorry for me, but I don't always have a choice. I just have this thought that if I got close to someone and they saw how others treated me they might think less of me or other people might somehow persuade them to feel that way and then they would stop caring about me. I guess it's because things like that have happened to me before.