Hate the stress of love and dating

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I've just had enough. I'm tired of how difficult this is. I'm torn between the trying to make an effort and going with the flow. Desperate is a turn off. Lack of interest is a turn off. You'd think that being a moderate in-between would actually be easier, but it requires so much effort to get the balance right.

Mostly I think that all the failures came from trying to fit jigsaw pieces in the wrong place. I got frustrated: "Why won't this work? It works for other people? What's wrong with me?"

I am eccentric and I don't want someone normal and boring. And normal and boring people don't want me. It's just taken a long time to find someone I actually do like, I mean genuinely like who I'm actually attracted to, who I enjoy talking to and who I want to spend time with and now I'm scared that even that spark isn't real. What if I'm just lonely and want I it to be real.

I think a lot of the recent panic has been, what if he actually likes me back? I don't know what to do. This never happens! For a while I suspected he liked me and I wasn't getting much encouragement from him. Seriously guys if you like a girl, don't just stare at her. Maybe try and talk to her.

My plan is just to go with the flow and not stress myself out. If it doesn't work out I'll just continue on as normal and I haven't really lost anything because I never had anything in the first place. Just got to keep going.

Tic toc, tic toc...

Well, wait...so the guy in question never ever talked to you? Never had one to one conversation? Or are you talking in general again?

In general again. I know... I'm rather dramatic.

Yes we have had many conversations.

In the name of guys, I say: Seriously girls, if you like a guy, and you catch him staring at you, don't just pretend that you are not noticing, maybe try to smile at the guy, wave to him, anything...any sign, otherwise the guy will never know that his attention is wanted, and will never come to talk to you because it would be so awkward if you don't show anything, we are not mind-readers.

I know it seems romantic to catch someone's eyes across the room, but when you look up and see someone staring intently at you it can be quite disconcerting. And I have on occasion thought to myself, "why is he staring at me?!" before looking away. When you look back, they've stop staring because you've caught them, so you can't smile. It's too late.

But then you second guess yourself. Do I look weird? Is that why they're staring? Do I have something on my face? So you don't want to go over and talk to them because it feels weird.