Why I wait...

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Joined: 12 May 2008
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28 Jul 2008, 4:26 pm

Where our thoughts go, so go our actions. By focusing on not failing, you lose direction towards what you really want in a relationship. Given enough time, it can become so ingrained that you no longer recognize what it was in a relationship you desired in the first place. You have had a form of success; you have loved intensely. Start there.

M.

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My thanks to all the wonderful members here; I will miss the opportunity to continue to learn and work with you.

For those who seek an alternative, it is coming.

So long, and thanks for all the fish!

ToadOfSteel
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28 Jul 2008, 9:53 pm

I know precisely what I want in a relationship: a companion that I can share the rest of my life with. Obviously, a failure in and of itself means that i'm going in the opposite direction I want to go...

Gamester
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28 Jul 2008, 10:29 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:

How can I focus on success when there is no past success to work on? That's why I focus less on success, and more on trying to not fail...

well............that's a start. a slightly less then obscure start, but it's a start nonetheless.

Past sucesses aren't measured by whether or not the relationship worked, it's about what you learned about yourself in the process.

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Rynok
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31 Jul 2008, 7:44 pm

Gamester wrote:

Past sucesses aren't measured by whether or not the relationship worked, it's about what you learned about yourself in the process.

That way you can know everything about yourself when you die single and alone.

But hey, it isn't your fault you didn't meet that "someone special". Blame society and their half-hazard way of "hooking you up".

Gamester
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31 Jul 2008, 9:41 pm

Rynok wrote:

Gamester wrote:

Past sucesses aren't measured by whether or not the relationship worked, it's about what you learned about yourself in the process.

That way you can know everything about yourself when you die single and alone.

But hey, it isn't your fault you didn't meet that "someone special". Blame society and their half-hazard way of "hooking you up".

Blame Disney and Cinderella (all three movies)

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I want peace for all. Simple yet elegant.

ToadOfSteel
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02 Aug 2008, 12:10 am

Rynok wrote:

Blame society and their half-hazard way of "hooking you up".

DAMN YOU SOCIETY!! !!!1 :evil:

In all seriousness though, if society wasn't as fast-paced as it is, I would actually have time to get to know a woman before I was socially expected to start dating her...

Rynok
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02 Aug 2008, 12:22 am

Yeah, go move out to the country...might be slower there (although less people to interact with so your available pool also drops).

Otherwise:
You got 10s....GO!

ToadOfSteel
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11 Aug 2008, 10:57 pm

I'm going to resurrect this thread to try and actually resolve the issue at hand. You say I have 10 seconds. Other people are able to pull this off in that span of time, so that's a place to start. How do other people:
-Determine that they are attracted to someone else,
-Determine that the other person is attracted to them,
-Make an approach, and
-Learn enough of their personality that they know that this is a person they can at the very least spend some amount of time with...

...all in the span of 10 seconds? To me, it seems like you have to be superman to pull all that off that quickly, but otherwise normal people are capable of pulling it off, so there has to be a way...

Gamester
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11 Aug 2008, 11:09 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:

the ten seconds was a Full Metal Panic in joke. since Rynok has a Saske Sogara avy. It's obvious that sooner or later that would happen.

It takes time. I can say that much.

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Rynok
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11 Aug 2008, 11:28 pm

I've seen all of Full Metal Panic but I don't remember anything about 10s on the dating.
Sagara had a bunch of trouble learning how to date though, that's for sure.
(I feel like I relate to him in some ways, which is why I use him as my avatar)

10s was just me expounding upon the truth. In reality:
You say "Hi" to a girl your physically attracted to, just to see if you two can hold a conversation.
If the conversation goes well and your not bored and she doesn't make an excuse to leave, then assume your off to a good start.
End on a good note that allows you to plan a time to maybe meet again.
(So, you come here often? Wanna go grab something to eat after you get finished up here?...something so you meet again later)

If the conversation flows, most likely they have at least a bearable personality and chances are you will find you actually like their personality (because you would otherwise probably get annoyed or bored with the things they talk about)

Praetorius
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11 Aug 2008, 11:32 pm

ToadOfSteel wrote:

Why I wait...

That's a mistake.

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