Has anyone never had a GF/BF before?

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I hadn't either, when I was 18 (change "girl" to "boy"). Literally zero experience. I thought there was no hope for me. I was beginning to think that I would never be in a relationship. (it all seems a bit silly now, especially as 18 seems very young in perspective). Then it all came together at age 19 rather suddenly.

I didn't have a GF or even a date until I was 28, and I eventually married her and we've been happy for 7 years. I always thought there was no hope for me either, but found there was after all.

When I was a teenager, my parents didn't believe teenagers should date or have boyfriends/girlfriends. Not that it would have made a difference anyway, considering the social structure of my high school that pretty much branded me as an outsider since I hadn't been going to school/church/etc. with the students there all my life. Baiscally, it was a christian school where most of the students had gone to elementary school together, or went to church together, and since I was from outside of that, I pretty much didn't belong and my parents wouldn't transfer me out to another school and made me stay there 4 years.

[quote= When I was in 2nd-3rd grade I fell in love with this girl. She found out about it and she was really mean about it.[/quote]
Ha!

I know a boy who was like that and had that happen.

Ha![/quote]

First girl I fell in love with was the same. She didn't want my attention or love, but she responded to my advances as if I simply didn't exist. That kind of "discounting" triggered some kind of anger in me, and I said some nasty things to her. I got in trouble, and she was all "he's such a bastard".

I know women can have a different way of doing things, but if she had told me to f**k off to my face, even screamed it at me in front of the class, I know I would have done just that and left her in piece.
For some reason saying that you're not interested in me, literally and clearly, has the right effect, while the "silent treatment" (i.e. saying nothing, and pretending I'm not there) provokes some kind of old anger.

well I didnt have one when I was born

Never had one. I think that is partly out of fear too. My high school has the second highest STD transmission rate in the state of Pennsylvania.

Buddy, I certainly feel you, although it has only been 21 years for me, it's still is a b***h to deal with. If you've been single awhile, you feel totally isolated from women and consider them an alien entity, but at the same time it annoys/angers you that have trouble getting girls when some guys seem to have all the luck in the world. I remember seeing couples in high school and getting so annoyed because they were all over each other, but I was jealous because they were sharing something I never had.

I have a fear of rejection too, and that's probably why I haven't been trying as of lately. I also don't try because I see such efforts as futile, and I haven't met a girl yet on this planet who has enticed me intellectually as well as physically. And if I met such a girl, what is the likelihood of us meshing together if I'm no Don Juan? Perhaps a 35%, but not good enough to bet on. After being single 21 years, I don't really see women as romantic objects of affection, I see them more as either friends or acquaintances. Romantically, they are so bizzare and foreign to me that I either see them with contempt, or I just choose not to see them at all romantically, although deep down I might think about "What if we dated, what would that be like?" Women- can't live with them, can't live without them, they are bizzare creatures that defy male explanation.

Does no one else find this thread a little depressing?-but it is good to know we're not alone.

For those who havn't the experience, maybe it's like selling or like finding a job, where people often say it's a 'numbers game'. In other words, you've got to keep approaching, and trying, and then the odds are that you'll meet someone who ticks enough boxes (and you tick enough of their boxes).

It's hard enough for NTs dating NTs maybe 1/50 approaches(?), then I dare not think what the numbers need to be for us in the dating world. Surely aspies approaching/dating aspies is going to meet with more 'success' whatever your measure of success is.

I never had a girlfriend and I never have been kissed or kissed one. I guess I will never have a girlfriend, or if ever get one, it will be someone that I won't care for...

mm.

ive never had a GF but ive gotten action. good action with a vixen. wat happens at the cape stays at the cape

Agreed, but people should understand that it is tough to live with the stigma of being an older virgin, particulary if it is generally involuntary.

I'm 17 never had sex, gf, never kissed a girl etc and i feel really embarassed and insecure about never kissing a girl to be honest.

No gf, went on two dates so far, had sex though - definitely prefer it when there is a relationship and I have kissed a girl.

I have never been in a serious relationship before. Just quick dates.

Nothing beyond a very informal string of dates. Still got the v-card. I've seriously come a long way in the past semester and I'm going to go even further outside of what I currently perceive to be "my comfort zone" next semester partly because the post college dating scene scares the s**t out of me.

I'm wondering if all the progress I've made is largely dependent on the type of girls (the kind that don't really do small talk that much relative to others) I've met this semester. If it is, then I've still got a stupidly long way to go, because that type is pretty rare.