Dating/Marrying People from a foreign culture Your thoughts?

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I dated an Ecuadorian guy for 6 years..He probably woulda ditched me within the first couple of weeks (on the basis of my extreme immaturity, and emotional instability..and a lack of chemistry between us)....had there not been something sorta drilled into him through his kinda sorta hard-core Catholic upbringing that instilled in him the sorta obligation to stay with me no matter what....but I guess it could have also had to do with the fact that I was horribly underaged when we started dating and um...maybe he felt stuck with me....and also we were in a band together...which is how we got together in the first place...

I practicly lived at his house with his mom and grandmother who did not speak english...but he himself was very "Americanized".....His mom felt sorry for me because in her mind I had been raised without any culture or morals or..something....and that is the only reason she let me stick around...and felt obliged to take me under her wing even though she would wail on him for keeping a teenaged whore in the house...

I participated in thier large family gatherings...the language barrier was a good excuse for my wall-floweryness...

Is there a European population in the anywhere in the Northeastern US? And, no, I am not asking for anything serious. Just wondering.

Going out with someone from another culture,doesn't matter at all,as long as both partners love another and share things in common.I'm Mexican,and I would love to have a girlfriend from Colombia or Argentina.By the way,Mexican,Colombian,and Argentine women are the prettiest from Latin America!

Not a problem as long as she pass all my other criterias - and we can understand eachother.

I'm a half-asian aspie and a girl. You would think that would be an awesome combination but it is an absolute nightmare for me.

Being approached and stalked by guys with their asian fetishes...having guys attracted to you cause you're some cute asian. It's insane. It's horrifying.

And of course they turned away once my true personality kicks in...so hypocritically typical of them.

My dad's side of the family are asian-fetish people. Aside from my dad marrying a Korean, he has a brother who married a Vietnamese woman earlier this year. I worry about what they were thinking when they married their wives. Especially my dad. My parents have a very loveless marriage. My mom yells at my dad at least twice a week and they dont even sleep in the same room.

I wouldn't want some guy to be interested in me on account of being asian. Some of those people are just crazy. Good to know that most guys are becoming more PC about being attracted to other races and such but I find it shallow when they're attracted to me cause I'm part asian. Oh well.

I remember in 8th grade I was really shy...even worst then now. There would be these girls trying to talk to me. They were cute but i was too shy to say anything. anyways a group of them figured out where I lived and they came over my house and rang my doorbell and asked me if I wanted to go with them to the park.

If i were an aspie girl i would be like this in my head: "EWWWW no they must have some black guy fetish so weird"

but instead I went. i was unconfortable about the fact that I was shy.....eventually I ended up with a girlfriend that night.
But just think if there was this mutual kind of approach between all sexes. We wouldnt have complaining aspie guys because they would know if a girl were interested or now without having to always make every move.

Please girls dont complain

like the saying goes "There would be a problem if they weren't looking at you" whether they have a fetish or not. Enjoy it while it lasts

Wow, jb... just wow. There is the distinct impression from your last posts that you know better than those who having the experience, and that your desires and preferences have precedence over theirs. Apologies that one's personal preference "offends" you... *shakes head* But it isn't up to you, period, and asking people not to complain about what makes them uncomfortable seems rather absurd. From your writing, you do not seem to lack self-confidence - perhaps putting that into work for you through taking a more active, non-aggressive approach to dating would be a better next step for you.


M.

Regardless, it isn't up to you to decide how another person acts. As for the suggestion of self-confidence, I take a bit of issue with being reliant on an external source. More to the point, if someone is starting a business and their partner is calling them a loser - why in the hell are they with that person in the first place? The Obama comparison just makes no sense to me, to be honest. What is it that you think women are looking for, jb? You're not going to attract everyone, and you're not going to necessarily attract the people you are attracted to - this is part of life, I'm afraid. What you do with it is up to you.


M.

go read my latest post

Interesting how some people think that they will be more accepted by a woman of a different nationality or race just because they have aspergers. While in theory I think it's true to a certain degree, I just don't think it would be that different than in the west. Granted, some women are raised to believe that they are their man's property and that the men are there to take care of them as they don't have the choice to be independent abroad. But there are various things I could see such as religion. Nothing wrong with pleasing a guy but I would think it to be miserable for the woman if she didn't share the same feelings. But I think in the west, we often do a lot of stereotyping in the way people behave. Some true and some not so true.

For instance, I met a friend of my dad's who married a Japanese woman. He complained how western women were only interested in themselves and that they were not very feminine or doing what comes natural to women. When I met his wife, I thought she was very nice, polite, and pretty. Well ever since he lost his job, his wife is the one that's been working from what I hear. They are also in the process of a divorce, I guess the two haven't been getting along. So sometimes I wonder if people of other cultures present themselves differently when meeting people in the same way we would if we were meeting strangers....just in a different custom. My description of acceptance has many levels and the deepest level in terms of relationships is actually being in that relaionship not basing it off on first impressions. In a relationship with an expansion of time, you get to know the real person better than when you first met them. From my experience, the guy I was with seem very nice and polite. But he turned out to be a completely different person after we were together for a while.

Anyway, I've always had thing for guys of different races and even nationalities....it just makes it seem as if they were exotic. My thinking of ever having a relationship however, is different. I guess it would depend but I wouldn't want to be in one where it's customary for guys to abuse or control their wives....and yes there are cultures like that especially in the east. Not that I believe all guys are like this but I would not want a relationship with a guy who was use to treating women cruelly or coming from an extreme background of religion. So I'd have to have something in common with him but most importantly be respected just as I respect him.

I very much doubt foreign would accept me as far as relationships go. I'm a little outspoken with my opinions when it comes to agreements and disagreements and I'm not very feminine.....in some ways I wish I was but it would be just as frustrating as trying to be social as an NT.

Anyway, there may be more than various reasons of why guys (and women) are attracted to foreign people. I don't think it's just aspie guys since I've seen similar opinions expressed about how a woman from an exotic country would treat them better than their own. Mail order brides are still pretty popular right now. For me, I think it's just fair to say I just find men of different nationalities attractive because it's like the forbidden fruit.

Just trust me when I say the guys who are constantly hounding me are total rice-chasers. I've picked up on a lot of the signs that indicate when one is obviously just talking me cause I'm asian.

I think it is a problem if someone is looking for a significant other based on ethinicity instead of personality and compatibility. Granted at one time, I was like this but I grew out of it. Plus I am no longer interested in pursuing a romantic relationship. I can't cope when any person approaches me, period.