Tell me what sucks about you and I'll work w/ you to fix it

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I thought you knew about my miscarriage. I talked about it at I2 and so did lot of other members, and it's been discussed here too.

No one knows what caused it. They said I didn't do anything wrong. Miscarriages are very common. 1 in 4 pregnancies end in one and 80% of them happen in the first termester. Many women worry about it in their early pregnancies. Then the chances are less up to 20 weeks of pregnancy. I would have been at 22 weeks.

Miscarriages can happen due to something wrong with the egg due to chromosome defects or it had a defect in it that keeps the baby from growing so your body spontaneously aborts it. That's the main reason for it in early pregnancies. But tbh, I would rather have a perfect baby than a severely defective baby or a baby that won't live after it's born. That's the worse thing that can happen. Finding out the baby had no brain or no lungs or no heart, etc. and it won't live after its born or it's all in one big ball and there is no body shape. If that happened, I would end my pregnancy because there be no point in staying pregnant. Why wait four more months to have it if it won't live after birth? That's a waste of time and having my tummy get bigger for nothing and get more stretch marks (if they occur) and maybe have more pregnancy side effects? Why suffer in the heat for a baby I won't be able to keep? Even my husband agrees there for when it be acceptable to have an abortion. I would still be sad of course because I waited to have a baby and then the sad news breaks after fours months of pregnancy that the baby is so severely deformed it won't live after birth.

Last edited by Spokane_Girl on 28 Nov 2009, 8:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I don't feel safe of lots of things.
And I always feel sad of something that is not happen but has high possibility to be happened.

What can I do to fix that insecurity issue?

Thank you very much!

Because just not wanting to do minor things can be an attention thing too. Depending on how bad it is.

That's a good way of thinking, too.
The most you can really do in that regard is to keep trying for a healthy baby.

So what you're saying is that you look around corners and are scared of what may happen?
What do you think may happen?

Mainly, my face. I think this because if there is something wrong with my face, there is utterly nothing I would be able to do about it.

I feel as if I have to work hard to get sex appeal because I don't have any to begin with, and have numerous things actually working against me. I just don't feel like I can turn anyone on, largely because I don't think I ever did.

I'm not concerned if I'm percieved as bare-boned; I can work out. I'm not concerned if it's my weight; I can lose weight. But if it's my face...I'm screwed.

typical reaction for someone with a messiah complex and a superiority complex. you alone have the answers for everyone. not likely. only a fool cannot see through such arrogance.

Meh, think what you like. I'm not forcing people to post here. They have a choice don't they? One person alone may get helped, and if thats the case the thread has been worth it.
Go moan somewhere else.

Last edited by hale_bopp on 28 Nov 2009, 5:43 pm, edited 1 time in total.

So your main issue is with your face? The first option is surgery if it bothers you that much, but who in your personal opinion has an ideal face?

Your face is just fine, with or without glasses. I know Aspies are sick to death of being told to smile but honestly, a smile is literally the only thing missing. At the risk of sounding like another annoying NT, I just have to say you have a nice face- smile. Maybe even just a little half smile. It isn't weight. It isn't genetics. It's just that you look upset at whoever is taking both those pictures. And if you walk around looking upset, women won't want to be with you because they'll be afraid of your moods. And maybe you are evven now thinking, "what?!?!? I wasn't upset when those pictures were taken". But that's how you look. A nice looking man in a very bad mood. Women avoid an angry man. So smile. Just a little.

Well, being lonely makes me unhappy in general... Yes, I have these skills, but I feel like there's nobody there to appreciate them, and if that's the case, what's the point in using said skills?


As far as I know, most other people don't generally regard me as a loser, but being down on my luck as I have been for the past 7 years doesn't help me think that highly of myself, as you can probably tell...


I've tried not caring what other people think before. It turned me into a misogynistic monster with zero empathy. I wouldn't want to burden anybody with that...


I honestly don't think losing weight will improve anything. It might improve first impressions with a woman, but since I'm not attracted to any woman until I've known her for a while (and my theoretically "good" personality can override the weight problem to some extent), first impressions aren't going to mean anything in the long run... Having a job would mean money, but while there are plenty of women that will get with a guy strictly for the money, that still wouldn't be a woman loving me as a person, and I probably wouldnt be attracted as a result.

FYI, happiness enters the woman during coitus, not the other way around.

this is a recurrent theme i see here.

I have no self esteem (well I do except for dating. I think myself undateable). I have acne which I have cream and pills for and I'm overweight. I have lost my will to socialise except for with an exclusive few. I also have high anxiety levels and cut/burn/bite myself sometimes. I sometimes wish my life had never existed and hate my mother and sometimes resent my grandmother (I live with my grandparents)

Well you can diet and work out to lose weight. Keep using the acne cream.

I can't diet because my folks control my food intake. When I move out I'm gonna go anorexic for a while, just til I lose the weight and I can't go to the gym because I'm too young. I do go for walks sometimes but it's summer here and the pills I'm taking make me sensitive to the sun. Oh yeah if the pills I'm using haven't worked well enough (I find out in a week) I take a drug which could cause depression. I'm good at covering though so if I do get depressed everyone will think I'm fine

It doesn't matter. I don't know what exactly is wrong, I just suspect it's the reason I'm unattractive.

What if I just have the unfortunate combination of vague unattractive facial features that turn off girls and make me appear disgusting? I can't just walk into a clinic and say, "I dunno what's wrong with my face, but girls don't like it and I want them to."