Help Tim Tex attract a partner

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therange
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27 Feb 2010, 5:51 am

Tim's been on here for years, according to other members, saying the same things over and over again. If you can't see that he's just on here for attention (whether he realizes it or not) then you're fooled.

This thread isn't going to change his life. Only he can change his life. Which is why I refuse to give advice anymore, even to those who listen and appreciate it.

I'm not the only one frustrated about the attention-seeking and whining, other people just discuss it in private.



Tintinnabulation
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27 Feb 2010, 5:59 am

I'm going to try to give some real advice here.

Since I don't know a whole lot about Tim, I'll address some possible problems. One of the most propitious changes that a man can make is to move out of his parents place. I don't know if Tim lives with his parents, and if he does, I don't know if it's out of necessity. But Tim, if you do live with your parents, it is going to be very difficult to get into and stay in a relationship. First of all, the logistical issues of dating necessitate having your own residence. Secondly, not having a place is a signal to women that you are not ready to be in a relationship. It doesn't have to be far away from your parents, it doesn't have to be nice, and you can still spend time at your their place. People aren't actually that fussy about other people, but there are certain things that need to happen and this is one of them.

Then there are a whole bunch of things that could be causing problems. If you haven't been able to find somebody to date, there might be something that you need to have taken care of. Examples: if you have a skin problem that looks contagious, go to a dermatologist. If you have a serious speech impediment, see a speech therapist. If you rely on your parents to drive you everywhere, find some other way to do things. If you can't stop talking about God in casual conversation, see a psychiatrist. All this might sound obvious, but I'm always surprised by how many people don't take care of these things and then act surprised that they can't find a mate.

Lastly, just to touch on grad school, that sounds great. If you have any special talents or areas of expertise, don't be afraid to let people know about them. If you have taken care of the above and grad school helps you find a decent job, you have nothing to worry about and it's just a matter of being patient.



Tias
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27 Feb 2010, 6:08 am

And now we are on page 5, and STILL no tim_tex to see, besides his first post in the thread.
Ey he's never going to change if he has been complaining for years and never changed himself.
Then it is true, then this thread wont help him at all. Heck, it's even more funny that WE actualy have to point out to him what he should change or has to do, he's a grown up man, he should know what he should do, but does he do anything?
No, he sits and expects things to go his way.



Sound
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27 Feb 2010, 6:36 am

It's been less than a day. Chillax.



Tias
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27 Feb 2010, 6:58 am

This is still a thread regarding him, it's something he should bechecking often if he really wishes help.



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27 Feb 2010, 7:35 am

I think Tim's looks and personality are just fine as they are, I think the main thing limiting him is where he lives, I think he would be better off living somewhere more cosmopolitan. Ive found that when i lived in very ridgid conventional places it really brought me down and I could not find many 'like minded' people, but the times Ive lived in more cosmopolitan/interesting places Ive made more friends and enjoyed life more.

Most things with finding a 'significant other' is down to chance, my bf had not had much luck with women and had very low confidence in himself and people always told him to change but he met me and I like him just as he is and enjoy the same interests and values and find him very sexy.

It was just chance/luck that we met each other, so I think that probably in a lot of peoples cases its not in their control, but a person just has to let go of trying and just get on with their life and see what turns up.



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27 Feb 2010, 4:25 pm

Quote:
What you currently look like - a recent picture would be very useful


That is my most recent pic that I have online, taken June 2009. I have much more recent pics, but they would have to be scanned first.

Quote:
the sort of clothes you wear


I wear a T-shirt and shorts most places I go, but will wear a polo shirt and khakis as well, and a button-down shirt, slacks, and a tie in professional settings. I buy my clothes at Wal-Mart and J.C. Penney.

Quote:
what styles appeal to you and what don't


I am into professional styles, like one would wear on the job, and like clothes that are loose-fitting in casual situations, and especially during the hot Texas summers. I am not into they grunge, hippie, or goth styles, and I am not into tattoos or piercing. I wouldn't rule out a potential partner if she wore those things, but they're just not styles I would wear myself.

Quote:
What is your personality like in real life, what kind of people do you do things with


I have an excellent sense of humor, and I always like to talk about things that really interest me. My "depressive attitude" that people think I have on WP rarely shows in real life. I am very open about my feelings, and will say exactly what's on my mind. I usually do things with my family, but I hang out with a very good friend (fellow WP member LiendaBalla) at times.

Quote:
what industry do you work in/want to work in


I recently got my bachelor's degree in geography/urban planning, and I work in GIS (Geographic Information Systems), which is basically digital cartography. I worked in local government for 5 years, and I am actively seeking for work in either the public or private sector.

Quote:
what do you do for fun in your spare time currently


Besides WP, I like to go to the movies, go out to eat, go to museums, I like cycling and working out, I like being outdoors, and I love traveling (although money is a big factor in this). I also write, read, and draw.


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hale_bopp
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27 Feb 2010, 5:36 pm

hmm ok then. Is it possible to send me a bigger versoin of it? Maybe one without glasses so the glasses can be photoshopped on?



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28 Feb 2010, 3:50 am

Thanks for the questions at least.

The last thing I want to do is suggest a look that is not you. You shouldn't have to be someone else.



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28 Feb 2010, 7:59 am

hale_bopp wrote:
hmm ok then. Is it possible to send me a bigger versoin of it? Maybe one without glasses so the glasses can be photoshopped on?


I can do that. I am going to be a bit busy today, but I will get to it whenever I can.


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0_equals_true
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28 Feb 2010, 1:42 pm

This thread was ill conceived, although well intentioned

The fact that people are wound up by Tim or Toads is a weakness in themselves. Why so het up by other people's problems?

You can only give encouragement and pointers over the net. There is too much focus on endgame. Usually the problem is the person doesn’t know how to get where their going so focusing on the final scene is just going to reinforce their previous views.

Things like dress sense, whilst part an parcel, are side concern at them moment, when people are

The fact is Tim has already had some degree of success he just doesn't see it that way. Toad has also had success. Again if you are fatalistic anything good becomes negative very quickly unless it is the fairy tail outcome.

Besides Tim situation, and complaints aren't unique. It is only because some have found his post initiating that they have decided to take matters into their own hands. This is the wrong motivation.



therange
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28 Feb 2010, 2:59 pm

Tim has refused advice, not just from me, but everyone else, yet wants, wants, wants in a partner in return. He isn't whining that he doesn't have a girlfriend, he's whining that he doesn't have a particular girlfriend. And I'm sorry, the kind of woman he wants to attract (Jessica Rabbit figure, quiet, religious, yet with a wild sexual side) would not want the current version of him. Have I been too harsh? Probably. But the underlying message, that the current version of Tim - inside and outside - will not attract the woman he wants - is a fact. It's also a fact that whining on a message board about not having said girlfriend is passive-aggressive.



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28 Feb 2010, 3:06 pm

therange wrote:
Tim has refused advice, not just from me, but everyone else, yet wants, wants, wants in a partner in return. He isn't whining that he doesn't have a girlfriend, he's whining that he doesn't have a particular girlfriend. And I'm sorry, the kind of woman he wants to attract (Jessica Rabbit figure, quiet, religious, yet with a wild sexual side) would not want the current version of him. Have I been too harsh? Probably. But the underlying message, that the current version of Tim - inside and outside - will not attract the woman he wants - is a fact. It's also a fact that whining on a message board about not having said girlfriend is passive-aggressive.


Yes, he has chosen to ignore your advice. However, I find much more sound and fury coming from you as of late due to that fact than I've heard any complaint from Tim regarding his situation. It would be my suggestion that you find something else to occupy your time, since you're not getting the results that you want from these discussions, and have had trouble keeping from attacking others in the process.


M.


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Tim_Tex
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28 Feb 2010, 3:27 pm

I never said anything about a Jessica Rabbit figure.

And for the records, many, if not most Christians have had sex outside of marriage.

Also, I am trying not to mention politics and religion this time, but this thread explains my beliefs:

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt110144.html


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28 Feb 2010, 7:16 pm

Location Location Location


You like to travel. So travel.

If you move to a state that is far from Texas, you will instantly become exotic. Your accent will turn heads. Women may ignore you in Texas because you are just another boring local guy. In Minnesota, you are suddenly exotic and therefore inherently interesting. Exotic is erotic.



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28 Feb 2010, 10:17 pm

SilverStar wrote:
He could stop obsessing about finding a conservative christian, who likes South Park for one thing.... :D


Yeah, conservative Christianity and South Park don't really mix :lol:

But even if she's not a conservative style Christian, but yet her morals are strong, I'd go for her.