Do dateless men have a right to be picky?

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So basically those women are only interested in men with low standards.

Refusing to date significantly overweight women is NOT being superficial. There are multiple very good reasons to refuse significantly overweight women that have NOTHING to do with appearance. Very unhealthy being the #1 non-superficial reason.

What is really happening is that those women just want to get petty revenge on the guys who refused to date them previously. That is all it is. Petty revenge. And they claim they are taking the high moral ground! Bull****.

I agree that being overweight is not healthy. However, if a woman that was previously overweight and adopts a healty lifestyle and looses the weight. Then a man who ignored, rejected, and poked fun at her does not have the right to come and try to be friendly with her now that she is thin. So the woman rejected him flat out. And rightfully so, because he deserved it.

And the pettiness started was when he was mean to her because she was overweight. So really he's the one who started it with his shallowness.

I think people should stop using the fact "overwirght is unhealthy" as a scapegoat for not liking fat girls.

You don't like fat girls because they don't turn you on, that's that.

Don't even bother mentioning anything about genetic makeup means you're attracted to healthy people, because in the olden days fat women were seen as beautiful and well nourished.

A lot of it is about society ideals, admit it.

My aunts very overweight, I don't agree with the way she lives her life and I do say something. Being turned on or not hasn't got anything to do with it and it's insulting that you read our opinions and replace them in your head with your own theories. Believe it or not, I know my own mind quite well.....

I agree. Back in the day most men would look for a good sturdy girl. And you can't get sturdy from a skinny string bean. And haven't you heard the term that used back in the day "breeder hips".

Last edited by sweetpraline on 08 Sep 2006, 12:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.

OK, so let's look at the dating process from an evolutionary point of view. Most girls only want the rough, agressive bad boy types; they don't want the nice guys, even though they'll treat them much better. Most guys only want the really hot, skinny supermodel types; they don't want the big girls, even though they might have nicer personalities. I'm a nice guy, and girls that most guys like won't give me the time of day. So what do I do? I go for girls that most guys don't like. In the end, two people end up with what (or who, to be exact) they're looking for, and they walk off into the sunset feeling happy. Despite the evolution trying to force nice guys and big girls into extinction, at least two of them manage to survive. Charles Darwin, you've been owned again.

You said that nicely. What you said could well be true. I still believe generally believe that the fat girl has more scope for improvement. I wish losing weight was the only thing I had to do to be attractive.

How about apple shaped woman who have no hips with the legs of a slim super modal and the top of Rosan Bar.

Do you feel that a woman in this shape should be condemned to a life of lonelieness because of her appearance? Listen up guys. Big girls have feelings too!

I am really starting to understand why so many young women are suffering from anorexia and bulemia. Because they probably have been listening to men who think the same way that many of the men in this forum think. (Guys! Beware of kissing a girl because she may have just thrown up in order to look good for you) They feel that no one will love them unless they are stick thin.

Beautiful women are heartless b*****s. They deserve suffering.

Alright yes I agree with that. If the man poked fun or was mean to her when she was overweight, yes it does make sense to reject him permanently. A person being overweight is certainly not valid justification to be mean to them.

However to just simply refuse to date a significantly overweight woman, this is NOT being mean by itself. Mean would be calling her names or something like that. But if the man just refuses without being mean about it, then he is doing nothing wrong.

I am NOT just using unhealthiness as a scapegoat, and here is the proof:
I also refuse to get involved with smokers, even hot-looking slim ones.


Significantly overweight girls look bad and do not turn me on, that is true. However there is MORE to it than that. Health is important to me and I make an effort to stay healthy. It annoys me when I see someone being very unhealthy. And being significantly overweight IS very unhealthy, it causes all sorts of problems, and that is a medical fact. And then there are the other issues as well. So I don't like significantly overweight girls because of ALL of these reasons:

* Looks bad, does not turn me on.
* Very unhealthy.
* Often accompanied by psychological problems (possibly minor).
* Often lazy.
* Often neglecting themselves.

Yes the lack of turning me on is certainly a reason, but definitely not the only reason.

And for the record, the reason I keep saying "significantly" in front of "overweight" is because I do not care about only a little bit overweight. i.e. I am not a weight nazi. It is only when it is overweight to a significant degree that it bothers me.

Breeder hips turn me on But only when not overweight!! Breeder hips on a woman who is anywhere within the healthy range, that is sexy.


I cannot speak for other men, but for myself, I find stick thin / underweight women to be unattractive or less attractive. Both underweight and overweight, if to a significant degree, is unattractive, and both are unhealthy. The most attractive is anywhere within the healthy range.

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Why? They are heartless b*****s because they refuse to date you who thinks they are b*****s? With that sort of attitude, it is no surprise they avoid you.

I know it is tough and I know that it must be the same as with many Aspies. That they seem to put more into love then they will ever seem to get back. The good news is that in Blity fat woman don’t seem to have a harder time anywere near has hard as aspies do. Many don’t diet and many and being fat doesn’t mean that they are any easier to get then thinner ladies. I know some of my workmates that date fat ladies, when I know they could have found someone finnier without too much trouble.

Last year on my way to a carnival of some sort I bumped into a girl who was willing to telling me her story about how when she was younger she attracted the attention of the men, but at a humble age of 35 the men don’t seem to give her any attention. She was not fat as such well not by American standards anyway, but she was very apple shaped, it gave her a shape of a middle aged woman. While I as an aspie man at 33 things could only get better, the sun was going down on her. I couldn’t imagine this happening to me. I barely got a chance out there it is not time for me to come home quite yet.

In many, but not all cases, there is some correlation between outer appearance and "bitchiness", for lack of a better term. I've always found the ones that lead others on (including myself) the worst are the most beautiful women. And it's not a surprise - they have many guys going after them, and they would naturally get tired of much of the attention and turn to being "bitchy" as a filter to find the ultimate prize: a guy that doesn't care what others think.

That seems logical to me, but I know of a beautiful woman would never be bitchy to a guy. She is wise within the limitation of being an NT, not as wise as me. The fact that she cares about me, and got my back I almost love her. But it would be laughable that we could be a partners because I would bore her with science and he would bore me with smalltalk.