venting and complaining about women

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it doesn't make sense to add them together like that.

Why not? Either group would complain about women when discussing dating issues (admittedly, about different sub-groups of women, but still).

it makes no sense to group them together because lesbian women do not really vent and complain about women in this forum... ever. so it implies something that is not borne out in reality.

That is true, in my experience, but I haven't been here for a long time so I didn't know. I've also noticed that homosexual men don't vent a lot here either, so I think those discussions are mostly kept to the LGBT forum...

Knowing how a partner thinks is a tough one. I do not understand how NTs think and NTs don't understand how I think unless we tell each other. Same goes for emotional status. NT's share this, helped by empathy. With low empathy the spiritual/intelectual bond is also more difficult. Communication between AS and NT is also difficult because each make different assumptions about what the other understands. One can work around this but it is hard work. NT men definately have a big advantage with NT women.

From my point of view, it seems like women pick and choose guys they want to talk to or pursue because of status or what their friends will think, or because they have power/money, etc. I can't be completely unattractive to almost all women. When I pursue a girl most of the time I get almost completely ignored, I can't be that unattractive or boring or dumb or whatever.

I think a lot has to do with my fear of social interaction and social clumsiness. But it still doesn't really explain much because girls to pursue men, even if it's just to be friends with them, with them doing very little. I know someone who is neurotypical, is short, average looking, but has girls talking to him and he does very little to grab their attention. I don't know what it is or why, but I still don't see what I'm doing wrong. Older women have frequently complimented my looks, enjoyed my company, laughed with me, flirted with me, so why can't a girl my age do the same? I just don't get it.

So from my frustrated point of view I assume that neurotypical women my age don't want anything to do with me because I don't fit in their social circle, or I'm not good enough for them. What else can I assume? Maybe I'm more successful with older women because I'm more comfortable around them and I socialize with them better? I just don't understand what I'm doing wrong.

this must be why men who are poor or who have low social status never get any women, and why a woman's friends have to always approve of who she dates.

except... it isn't true. *some* women are like that, just like *some* men are equally interested in a woman's social status/looks/money. that doesn't mean they are *all* like that.

People, just google "So you're mad about something on the internet" and check the comic. (anna banana is the one who discovered this great wisdom.)

Now go eat a sandwich.

my fave comment under that comic is this one:

Heh ... they said "Dickfinity" ...

Now make me one, as I ask in BOFH style with root privileges

*favorited for future arguments*

If you replace "some" with "most" then I would agree with you. There are always exceptions that proves the rule. What I've noticed from most decent looking girls/women ( even some ugly ones) I've been around growing up is that they want a man that is handsome/in shape, interesting, charismatic, relatively wealthy, and/or popular/have high socially status. Confidence is another major quality, but that goes hand-in-hand with some of the things that I mentioned.

Society in general is responsible for how shallow and superficial the world is today. People are always trying to one-up other. With their pride and ego, they need to date someone "high quality" to show off to their friends and make other people jealous.


I was born with none of the qualities that I mentioned, so I'm pretty much f****d when it comes to dating and having friends in general.

Maybe we need a men's forum to release all of our suppressed "misoginy", after all

The point is, women pick men who they are attracted to for whatever reason they might be attracted to them. Some women are actually more like men in that they don't look for deep connections in a relationship. They want and are attracted to more superficial assets and this could very well be status, money, whatever. It's really no different than a man being attracted to a woman because she has big breasts. You can hate those woman...I can hate those men, but why bother because I don't want a man who is a trophy collector, and you probably don't want a woman who's a gold digger.

Some women do want something deeper in a relationship, as do some men, and to be honest with you, it's a lot more difficult for most people to find someone they connect with on such a level because they have to be physically and emotionally attracted to them.

I don't know why the women who have rejected you have rejected you. It could be something about your personality, it could be you are approaching the wrong type of women, it could be bad luck, it could be some subconscious thing you are doing because you are afraid of actually having a relationship, or a combination of all of those things.



My roommate has PDD-NOS, is less socially outgoing than I am, is more rigid in his routines than I am, and occasionally goes out of his way to avoid people, yet he has a very large group of friends...or people who consider themselves his friend, who pursued him for friendship despite no effort on his part, and why this is, neither of us have been able to figure out. There is just something about him that cause people to have an affinity for him.

He never calls them, he never invites them anywhere, he usually doesn't remember who most of them are when he encounters them years later despite their apparently fond memories of him, and yet he gets invited to, and occasionally dragged along to weddings, birthday parties, and trips to Las Vegas.

Why? Who knows. It's one of the great mysteries of the universe.



You can assume any one of the things I've mentioned above. And not that I'm neurotypical but the one or two occasions I've been approached by a man who was date-able (meaning not old enough to be my father, not a dirty, toothless homeless guy wanting sex, not married, and so on) and turned him down, it wasn't because I had any notion that he was not "good enough". I was just not attracted to him.
and he was just another person to me, and frequently I was not in a position in my life where I wanted a relationship or could have one.

There used to be one. It was shut down. I'm not exactly sure why as it was before my time.