Initial attraction: Beta Male Body Language

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On a more serious note, regarding changing body language and all that, I think damned near the only way that'd be possible, at least for me, is doing it all in front of a camera, and then redoing it again and again. Apparently some people think I carry myself like a gay person, too. Which is wonderful for making good first impressions for wimmenz. I'm just in general confused about how people perceive me, I never get anyone saying I'm like "average" or not noticeable or anything, generally it's either strong in one direction of "wow, he's super cool" or "wow, he's weird and strange and I want nothing to do with him at all."

That said, it's not that women all hate me or anything, it's just sorta lack of confidence on my part to enter into relationships for a host of reasons. I've had women hit on me at least a few times, and probably more than I know, as I'm pretty damned oblivious, as it seems all girls are like "WHY DIDNT HE NOTICE ME BATTING MY EYELASHES IN MORSE CODE?! !" I'm just clueless about how to go from point A of attraction, to point B of relationship. I don't understand the inbetween.

It's a bit like the Dane Cook routine about dancing,
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TMwnDWeYgxo

I know it's frustrating and disappointing that women respond to these cliched superficial tactics. I submit that another thing that can work and may be less frequently effective but possibly more powerful when it works is growing on someone over time. Establishing yourself methodically as someone she feels superior too at first and then someone she adores and can't imagine being without until finally you're someone she can't bear to resist or disappoint is a time-honored and much deeper seduction. Seriously, who has time for that though?

I'm not sure what this obsession with ants is about, but we're discussing in a forum called "love and dating" , in a thread regarding beta male characteristics, so I fail to see the relevance in drawing ant drones into the conversation as the ant species reproduction and the human species reproduction are very different. The genes of 2 successful individuals is a greater benefit than the genes of 2 clearly unsuccessful individuals. With humans you have a much greater genetic diversity than you have with ants, which motivates individual reproduction and the reproduction of the genes that made the individual successful. This also promotes competition.

Think of each human individual as a unique vehicle for the genes, competing with other unique vehicles for genes, to be the one that gains the most resources and thus reproduces more. Take people with the sickle cell anemia gene, they were more suited to survival than the individuals that did not have this gene and were more vulnerable to malaria. The gene that allows humans to process dairy was obviously more successful than the lack of this gene and so on.

The reason why parthenogeneses is successful is that it allows successful individuals to blend their genes to promote offspring that will be an even better vehicle for the genes of the parents than the parents themselves were. It also punishes those who reproduced and created offspring with genetic disorders as their offspring should in a natural selection world were modern medicine isn't playing god would be dead and thus not hamper others with poor genetic material.

So you're not following the conversation - then what is the point?

Ants were brought up to demonstrate that the individual is irrelevant in terms of genetic success, because you had misrepresented Darwin as having stated that the best adapted creatures survive. It's incorrect, and he never expressed it that way (he expressed it as species, not individual creatures). Creatures do not survive - they all die; only the genes can survive indefinately. Individuals and individual survival aren't goals of evolution, they aren't even important except as they serve the true goal (the immortality of the gene).



I don't think you understand what parthenogenesis is. There is no blending of the genes. There are not multiple parents. It is not sexual reproduction. It was the primary method of reproduction in early organisms. They produced clones of themselves. Their genes were transmitted, in their entirety. It is a highly individualistic sort of reproduction, but primitive and much less succesful than cooperative (sexual) reproduction.

Then sexual reproduction evolved. Genes were no longer passed along in their entirety - the individual gave up that ability in favour of compromise with another individual on the genetic makeup of offspring. Sexual reproduction has been far more succesful, even though the individual is giving up the ability to transmit all of his genes and now has to share transmission with another individual, and can't reproduce all of his genes any longer. The individual is not paramount in evolution, neither is complete transmission of all genes.

Body language is language, communication, you change it by changing what you 'say'.
Walking is transportation. Walking is now automatic, unconscious.
If you want to change how you walk, you can address your unconscious and ask it to do so.
Talk inside your head, say:

All unconscious members will (not can, of course it can) you now go through all of my experiences from today and from before today and make a program that is truly best for me. A program that make me walk and move and stand more macho, (or any word you strongly identify w/masculinity) more like a man.
To make me feel comfortable and confident and happy and relaxed. (any order)
And when this program is ready (not done, nothing is ever done) will you integrate and incorporate it into any and all of my systems, like my communication systems, movement and transportation systems, attitude and behavior systems (these are for examples so it knows what type of thing you're referring to) and/or any and all systems that is right*, good* and/or* appropriate*. (give your unconscious members lots of flexibility to do thing their way, they know best)
And will you use this program any time it it right or good and/or appropriate to use.

I've been using this type (highly modified) of re-synchronization to permanently change about a half dozen things a day for about the last fiveish years with about a 90% first time success ratio.
Most of the time you wont even notice the difference, but for me the change happens and is stable about 24-30 hours later.

The biggest part is getting your unconscious to recognize that you're addressing it. If you can learn it's preffered or accepted 'name', you've conquered humankind's most annoying communication barrier. Ourselves.

drat, gotta run. buncha lil brats running around screaming lol and you know what the grocery bags say.
Keep Away From Children!

I found this video to be informative and realistic.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SBOtj1RmaUE[/youtube]

Wow. That was quite the eye-opener.

Excellent, concise video. Most of us may think we're the "Forever Alone" guy at the 6 minute mark, but we may be getting those blasted unspoken "tells" like crazy and we're just not noticing or misinterpreting them.

Last edited by BlueMax on 27 Jun 2012, 1:16 am, edited 1 time in total.

Which is exactly why you guys should memorize these scenarios for easier decoding.

And The Hulk is a fine example of a GAMMA male - totally radioactive!

One of the things I have to learn to control in my own body language is preening. I preen constantly because of social anxiety--when I'm talking to women and men, or no one. I've always got my hands in my hair, adjusting my glasses (if I'm wearing them), adjusting my collar, playing with my necklace, rubbing my arms, touching my face...it's incessant. And it's a way to relieve anxiety.

Also, I tend to make too much eye contact. And there really is this one special eye contact that men and women do--and it's absolutely terrifying to me because I accidentally do it. When a woman looks around and glances at a man--then the man looks her directly in her eyes...it almost always means he's going to come over and talk to her....so I often go and hide when I accidentally do this with men, because it scares me that someone would interpret my looking at them as flirting. But hopefully, as I learn more about body language I will be able to use it in a sensible way--and then social situations won't be so helter skelter.

Last edited by Zinia on 27 Jun 2012, 10:29 am, edited 1 time in total.

I think it's really hard to read body language in real time. For me, I play events back in my head and try to examine what the person's body language was saying--by then it's too late, but I still think I learn from it. I think videos would be even better.

And I know it's hard to practice unnatural body language. I work in sales so I have to talk to lots of people and make a good impression--so I try to practice in the mirror--mostly things like posture and smiling (I already have to practice what I'm supposed to say to them, anyway). I'm not, naturally, a very good smiler unless I'm actually happy, or laughing at something funny.

But I know people can learn some general body language--especially for men, because male body language seems to be more about posture and looking around the room, and maybe a head tilt or some arm show--but it's not as intricate as blinking or eye popping (although I think men also eye pop to send images to women). Also, I read in an article that someone provided here, that smiling isn't that important for men to do, upon first contact.

I like the video that wolfheart posted. Too bad it doesn't really talk about how to attract the opposite sex with posturing, just how people tend to interact when attracted or not attracted. But it was really interesting.

That video teaches a very valuable lesson to any young guy who has trouble getting women. First impressions and social awkwardness do matter, whether or not you like it.

Thanks to whoever posted it!

Sorry, but what the guy did was definitely creepy. Staring at a distance for 10 seconds may be fine, but staring really close to her and not even saying anything = creepy. Not to mention stalking that girl and deflating her bike tire. Super effing creepy.



Those are definitely high schoolers, probably 17-18. And while alpha and beta may be oversimplifying a bit, it's certainly helpful to know the differences in their behavior, while also being aware of a few dumb stereotypes.

I don't know how applicable the video is outside of the bar scene. Don't approach women who avoid eye contact and approach those who do in those situations is what I gathered from it. Interesting, though.

To me it wasn't just that. He also seemed very awkward and nervous when giving that girl a ride in his car.........there were a few tips about that as well. He didn't know what to really say and tried to be funny when he was just sounding lame.