Virginity

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Joined: 8 Jul 2011
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Location: CT, USA

09 Jul 2012, 12:02 am

I still follow the idea that it's best to save it for marriage. How real life will work, I got no idea. Even in the 1950s, it was reported that like 90+% of people had premarital sex. Who knows. I don't wanna say premarital sex will never happen with me, and curse myself by my promise, but yeah.

BrenJB
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09 Jul 2012, 12:13 am

1000Knives wrote:

I think that is great. Although I have a very different belief than most do about marriage but let's not get off topic with THAT one! haha

indyadam
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11 Jul 2012, 3:09 am

As one of the posters said. Its not hard. Just focus on pleasing her more than focusing on getting off. Yes, your first time will not likely be magical. I have been with 2 girls, both first times weren't great. It takes a few times to find what a girl likes. But with both girls after 2-3 times you figure out what they like and they will come to you to work on that lack of experience. Just relax, as BrenJB keeps saying, make it love, make her feel special, yes sex is/should be fun, but its that intimacy that makes it the huge event that everyone talks about. My advice is wait for someone you care about, because otherwise if its just a prostitute, all your doing is getting off. and your hand is a lot cheaper than that.

BlueMax
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11 Jul 2012, 4:30 am

There's something else to consider... every person you ever have sex with you will compare to each other (whether you plan to or not.) If you meet a wonderful woman someday and become a couple, you will compare her sexuality to the hooker and may be disappointed she doesn't have the same "skills".

Without that *ahem* carnal knowledge, you may be blissfully ignorant and simply enjoy unskilled but loving intercourse with someone meaningful.

If you decide on a prostitute it won't be the end of the world, but it's also something that can't be undone. Just bear it in mind while you consider your options

DogsWithoutHorses
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11 Jul 2012, 6:20 am

indyadam wrote:

This ^
I don't know if there is a huge difference in sensation for guys or something but while sex with somebody I really like is awesome, masturbation totally trumps sex with someone I'm not really into.

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edgewaters
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11 Jul 2012, 7:22 am

DogsWithoutHorses wrote:

I don't know if there is a huge difference in sensation for guys or something but while sex with somebody I really like is awesome, masturbation totally trumps sex with someone I'm not really into.

The sensations aren't nearly as good but imagination > reality and its almost effortless by comparison, meaning you can just focus on the pleasure rather than feeling like you're trying to get off while doing some sort of heavy labour. Sometimes sex feels like trying to move a washing machine up a staircase by yourself, its hard to really enjoy in such cases (and no, I am not terribly fit).

indyadam
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11 Jul 2012, 12:10 pm

DogsWithoutHorses wrote:

indyadam wrote:

My girlfriend once explained it to me like this, and i think its valid
"Great sex is amazing, mind blowing, cant stop wanting more of it and is always on your mind. Bad sex... well id rather have a PB&J sandwich than have bad sex"
my advice still stands, wait till you find someone who it is more about if they are enjoying it, than you getting off. its worth that wait

aspiemike
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11 Jul 2012, 3:51 pm

I did not read a whole lot of the posts on here so far. I lost my virginity at the age of 21 in a *gasp* drunken one night stand. I never saw that girl again. Had one girl I met and dated briefly when I was 22 and was figuring out how to please her. She dumped me for whatever reason. I then had another one night stand at 24 and that was even worse than the first time. Have not had sex since. In total, I have had sex enough times to count on one hand.
Take it from me. Meet someone you can get intimate with and help try and please them. No sense in doing something you will regret later.

AJCoyne
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11 Jul 2012, 6:40 pm

Please don't hire a prostitute, if your prospective girlfriend/partner is not understanding then they're not right for you.

HisDivineMajesty
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11 Jul 2012, 6:53 pm

AJCoyne wrote:

Please don't hire a prostitute, if your prospective girlfriend/partner is not understanding then they're not right for you.

That's the problem with a lot of the issues discussed here. In an ideal society, if everything was perfect and everyone had a soul mate, that would be no problem. However, that's not true, and for many people here - especially guys - it's a matter of taking what you can get. And that's not much. Even most of my 'neurotypical' friends have a very difficult time getting a partner. They're all guys with a good financial situation, decent looks and friendly personalities. But they're guys.

AJCoyne
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11 Jul 2012, 6:55 pm

HisDivineMajesty wrote:

AJCoyne wrote:

Please don't hire a prostitute, if your prospective girlfriend/partner is not understanding then they're not right for you.

Fair point, I can't put myself in a man's shoes so to speak, but for me turning to a prostitute seems like a very drastic decision for the sake of experience.

HisDivineMajesty
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11 Jul 2012, 7:24 pm

AJCoyne wrote:

Fair point, I can't put myself in a man's shoes so to speak, but for me turning to a prostitute seems like a very drastic decision for the sake of experience.

It's probably not that bad to hire a prostitute. If it's the only way for me to have sex, then it's what I'll do.
There's no alternative anyway. In my life so far, not one woman has expressed even remote romantic or sexual interest in me.

bizboy1
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11 Jul 2012, 7:32 pm

I look forward to the day when Libertarian's are victorious and prostitution becomes legalized. We could definitely be helping a lot of women come out of poverty. Liberals don't like the fact that the unemployment rate would drop.

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bizboy1
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11 Jul 2012, 7:34 pm

indyadam wrote:

DogsWithoutHorses wrote:

indyadam wrote:

Bad sex? Well, I wouldn't mind bad sex since it's still sex. Give me some Xanax and I'm good to go.

I'm surprised women wouldn't even like bad sex. I mean sex is sex. I can't imagine it.

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bizboy1
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11 Jul 2012, 7:36 pm

AJCoyne wrote:

HisDivineMajesty wrote:

AJCoyne wrote:

Please don't hire a prostitute, if your prospective girlfriend/partner is not understanding then they're not right for you.

Fair point, I can't put myself in a man's shoes so to speak, but for me turning to a prostitute seems like a very drastic decision for the sake of experience.

Once you get passed the morality issue, you see prostitution as any other service. It can be a very therapeutic experience (in theory, haven't actually done it).

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AJCoyne
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11 Jul 2012, 7:40 pm

bizboy1 wrote:

[sarcasm]Yeeeeeah, no worries, we only fought about 100 years for equal rights. And of course the government feeding into a psychologically damaging trade is totally moral. Plus I'm sure something like that would be totally easy to enforce legally.[/sarcasm]

:wall:

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