Successfully Read the Cues and Had a Successful Date!

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Jono
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23 Jun 2014, 9:05 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:

Are you able to go into Yeoville these days?

I heard it used to be a great place to hang out, in the 1980s.

I saw a movie which depicted the Johannesburg commuter railroad--very interesting!

Yeoville is a far cry now from what it was back in the 1980's. It's a very crime-ridden area now and I would hesitate to walk in the streets alone there.

Vomelche
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23 Jun 2014, 10:34 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

^ I can't reveal the pm but I can say he did no mistake, she's just not the understanding type.

Giant, now you know why she's on eharmony.

I think its also this. They may not be a good match. However, the experience is very useful, its actually a good opportunity to practice things now that you know that it may not work out anyway, and try to do things you are usually not comfortable with. With regards to performance anxiety, don't worry about failing, just think of moving on to the next one, you tried your best anyway. It takes time to build up some of this confidence. Hopefully, you'll have more luck next time with the site and meet a good match, otherwise might still have to try other alternatives.

The_Face_of_Boo
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24 Jun 2014, 1:43 am

Jono wrote:

Under the circumstances, I'm actually kind of envious of GiantHockeyFan right now.

Don't be yet, remember the series of dates I got from okcupid? It all came to nothing.

I hope it won't be the case for Giant, but the number of available single women who you may find attractive and may be good match and happen to be in your geographical proximity is really small.

Giant got that much contacts because he's still a new member on eharmony and he successfully could catch their eyes (his height helps a lot too in not being filtered out) - this is the peak- it won't stay steadily that high if he doesn't find someone out of these contacts.

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 25 Jun 2014, 6:50 am, edited 1 time in total.

GiantHockeyFan
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25 Jun 2014, 6:32 am

Well, she ended it last night. I wasn't totally surprised. She told me (rightfully so) that I was trying too hard to fit her mold and could not seem to just relax and be myself and that it would not be fair to either of us. I totally agreed and can at least take it as a learning experience. She hugged me goodnight and said our paths would probably cross again. Oh well. It looks like I might not find anyone but at least it showed me there are decent women out there, even if we were not able to 'click'. Still have two more to meet and you never know.

SoftwareEngineer
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25 Jun 2014, 6:38 am

GiantHockeyFan wrote:

What you describe sounds like the normal process of elimination. Lots of people have the same experience. You're making progress and being successful.

The_Face_of_Boo
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25 Jun 2014, 6:56 am

GiantHockeyFan wrote:

How little bond women on dating sites have with a guy who had been that intimate with (I read your pm so I know everything) still amazes me. One little "imperfection" in your performance (which should be totally understood in your case, I find it so stupid of her that she took offense ar that) and they quickly end it.

That's probably because, while you have 2 on your waiting list, she has probably 20. That's why women on dating sites tend to be way faster and harsher in the elimination process.

That's online dating for men, and it sucks.

kraftiekortie
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25 Jun 2014, 8:44 am

You will shoot, and you will score, GiantHockeyFan! I'm sure of it.

FMX
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25 Jun 2014, 9:03 am

Sorry to hear that it didn't work out despite such a promising first date. More sorry to hear that it was, apparently, for a silly reason. I'd be interested to know what happened, too, if you don't mind PMing it to me.

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smudge
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25 Jun 2014, 10:03 am

I guess it isn't such a "little" imperfection. Being too agreeable *is* a big turnoff.

I would say more, but I think I'll PM it to GiantHockeyFan, unless he agrees for me to say what I think of him here. It might hurt, but it might help. Obviously I won't paste the parts of what he said in the PM he sent me, unless he agrees for this too. For the record, I don't want him pasting my PMs!

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The_Face_of_Boo
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25 Jun 2014, 12:45 pm

^ Ahh I see, you are attracted to someone who challenges you, who can disagree with you, who wouldn't hesitate to say a big NO to your face, typically manly, *roar*...
You get turned on by someone like.... me .

:trollface:

SoftwareEngineer
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25 Jun 2014, 1:21 pm

Seriously speaking, we see GiantHockeyFan achieved tremendous success in the area a reading non-verbal cues from neurotypical people - he has successful compensated for at least some of his disability. That is huge! I think he'll find his babe, however, even if he doesn't, think of the other areas his skills will positively affect - the doors which are open. At the bottom of my signature is a link to a radio show I guested on. During my interview, I describe a consulting engagement where I did everything I was asked to do in the way I was asked to do those things and I got everything wrong. I was a contractor and, while I wasn't fired or thrown out, I wasn't renewed. If I'd had GiantHockeyFans skills coupled with his self-confidence in using those skills, do you think I may have continued in that job? Do you think I might have been converted from a contractor to a full employee? In very important ways, GiantHockey fan is a huge success and an inspiration to others. If I'd had GiantHockeyFan's non-verbal communication skills, my life would have been much better and things would have been a lot easier for everyone. If you wish, click on the link below "Hear me talk about the Unspoken Nature of Corporate Politics:" at the bottom of this post.

smudge
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25 Jun 2014, 4:29 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

.

:trollface:

In all honesty - yes. And before you say it - no, I would not date someone who lives in another country.

I like being able to argue with someone without making them sulk. It happens all the time. And I prefer to hear someone's *real* opinion. I hate it when people are agreeable with me, and I hate it when people disagree with me just to "put me down". It's pathetic when people do that, and I notice they do it to me when I've said something they don't like. It would be nice to go out with someone who doesn't try to act like they know more than me too, and steal my ideas. Men do that quite often with me and I get fed up with it.

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The_Face_of_Boo
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26 Jun 2014, 1:58 am

smudge wrote:

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:

.

:trollface:

In all honesty - yes. And before you say it - no, I would not date someone who lives in another country.

lol but I wouldn't ask you out, I may be chronically single but I am not that desperate.

Quote:

I like being able to argue with someone without making them sulk. It happens all the time. And I prefer to hear someone's *real* opinion. I hate it when people are agreeable with me, and I hate it when people disagree with me just to "put me down". It's pathetic when people do that, and I notice they do it to me when I've said something they don't like. It would be nice to go out with someone who doesn't try to act like they know more than me too, and steal my ideas. Men do that quite often with me and I get fed up with it.

So in another term if he agrees with you all the time then he's wussy, and if he disagrees with you a lot then he's some narcissistic jerk trying to put you down.

Pfff, one can't win with you.

Well, let's say that some couple have the same political, same ideological and lifestyle views, and have similar personality types, wouldn't they agree with each other 95% of the times? Why is that so bad?

Ahhh you think it's Boring? Right?

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 26 Jun 2014, 2:27 am, edited 2 times in total.

The_Face_of_Boo
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26 Jun 2014, 2:08 am

SoftwareEngineer wrote:

It is very possible tho, however, that his date was simply desperate for a kiss and for sex, , maybe she was one of those (silly in my opinion) women who like "Have balls and just kiss me stupid!". Therefore it may just be a coincidence.
Btw, conservative women are more likely to have this kind of "romantic" thoughts, and eharmony is known to attract that kind.

One instance is not enough to conclude that he became tremendously suave in social skills.

kraftiekortie
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26 Jun 2014, 7:56 am

I think he's all right.

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