How can I initiate a date?

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I've only met a couple of guys kraftiekortie's size that gave me weird enough vibes to want to keep my distance. However, I had a boyfriend in college who was only 120 lbs, but he wrestled me to the ground to prevent me from leaving an argument before I realized what was happening.

I'm not familiar with OOM's stance on the subject, but learning self-defense is certainly a good thing. Like kraftiekortie alluded to, a few men have learned the unfortunate lesson that my height gives me the perfect advantage to deliver all my punching power to their diaphragm. What's bad is expecting self-defense to work at all times in all situations. While I think everyone should learn some self-defense techniques, I'll never advocate carrying a gun.

Those rape figures are not for Autistics. 96% is the VAST majority of our men and the VAST majority of our women. This is not because of stupid things heartbroken young men are saying on WP! In here, this is an AUTISTIC problem much more than a woman problem.

And part of the problem is that we as Autistics have been taught to be "good little boys and girls." Don't tell people no. Be compliant. If we go along, boy howdy, we will be "indistiguishable from peers." Except. most of us can get along with our peers. So, why are they referring to NTs'as our peers,especially because we we still ARE distinguishable as being vulnerable to danger.

And it's our young males too. And guess what? Often times our young men have it rougher after being raped than our women do. Because when a woman shares what happened to her, there is comfort from many sources. How many men here are receiving support here. No, they are hearing more about male rapists than they are about male rape victims. Maybe it takes an autistic to see that.

Way back when I was a teenager, my best friend and I would walk a couple miles on semi-desserted roads to get to each others homes. When we were walking alone, we wore baggy army fatigue jackets and gag glasses that had a fake nose and mustache attached. Cars would slow down, see our "faces." and speed up. I am not saying any woman "asks for rape", never. But if you are so terrified of of a few wolf whistles, or even a "nice rack," cover it up.Of course you have every right yo dress however you would like, but if that bothers you cover it up[ we only did the mustache thing when we were truly in vulnerable circumstances. Alone, walking through a neighborhood where, say construction workers were making comments about every woman under 100 years old and less than 900 pounds, it was no big deal. It was a cultural thing.

Also, with 96% of Autistic people being assaulted, maybe you should worry about triggering people who would not enjoy hearing 2 women, one of them CLUELESS about how Autistics tick, relentlessly go on and on about it And maybe people whose parents have divorced should NOT counsel Autitistic women that the husband will almost always go after all of the money. ALL Autistics should be wary of that. It is an Autistic male problem EVERY bit as much as an Autistic female problem. .

And remember when all this c**p got really ugly? I believe it was "someone" who decided to consult an expert to see if the expert considered what was going on was sexist abuse. Wow, that expert explained everything so quickly and completely to that person that they immediately became an "expert" themself on how to manipulate, I mean help, those 96% of Autistics who have been sexually assaulted.

And yeah, Ihave been raped. And yeah,it sucked. Every time. And yeah, at times it comes back and smacks me in the face. But mostly, I have always had bigger things to deal with. Like children dying, Like children wanting to die,like children being raped [ having it happen to your kid makes a personal rape comparatively a piece of cake,' having a husband die in your arms, knowing that neither you nor your husband are going to be around much longer and you are scared to death of what is going to happen to your disabled son when it happens.

I have my moments, and I do fall apart sometimes. I anticipate as this monster in my body progresses, I will fall apart more often, and I can count on WP people being here for me. But guys make catcalls ? If it really bothered you that much you could cover your "great beauty," Tear up an entire forum because of a few dumb things some guys on WP say? Yeah, I wish I could help these guys to understand that if they really want a relationship that they have to make some changes. And that some will accept that they might never have a romantic relationship but that they still can be happy and fulfilled people.

And another thing,NT lady, really, the only experts on being the most awesome Autistic possible, are other Autistics.

Apples to oranges.

The complimenter/complimentee roles are reversed.

We're talking about the societal heterosexual norm vs. homosexuality. I doubt there are many instances of men getting violent with women who compliment them vs. with gay guys that compliment them.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

Oh Vicky, I'm so sorry all that happened to you and yours and all ya'll had to deal with that! I so am! ((hugs)) Nobody deserves that, nobody.

I do want to say this though, and not to try and swagger between the typing up to that bar at the top of the page all acting badass like those 80's guys in the "Eye Of The Tiger Video" or anything because I am so most certainly not a badass and my point with this isn't at all to imply that if you just fight back it won't happen or you might not just get hurt worse for fighting back, but this is my experience and only my experience and as we all know, our experiences shape our ideas and such. I'm not going to go into a lot of yaddah yaddah BS details because I've told it all before, but I was bullied and beat up a lot in school and fought those girls back a couple times and won once (baseball bat, no skills at all then, I got lucky) but I only did it after my best friend forced me to do it because she was tired of seeing me being hurt and scared. Then I married a jackass when I was 18 and we were married a little over a year and I only really did that because my mother hated him and I wanted to "show her" because I was soooooo mature, huh, and get out of her house. The whole time he beat my ass, stole from me, lied to me, conned me, and did all kinds of terrible s**t to me. Really. One night when were were out together with his little brother but with divorce filed and pending already and I was as always hoping for maybe a complete change from the frog into Prince Charming, he hit me again and some way or other, maybe by divine providence, I just snapped. I had had enough and saw that I was bigger than him and by then I could take a punch about as good as any sparring partner in a boxing gym even though I couldn't throw one worth a f**k but rage compensates for a lot of things and I basically opened up a family size can of whoop ass on him that I didn't even know I had and handed him his ass really damn good. What did I have to lose? He's already beat me as bad as he could a bunch of times and did other s**t to me, so why not give it what I had?

After that I didn't take physical threats the same way. I still got my dumb ass in lots of situations where I had to throw down once again and I did and the more I did it and learned how and also just practiced and traded licks with a guy friend of mine who helped me learn how and also some dirty fighting moves as well the less I was afraid of being hit. I mean I had already been hit way more than Rocky had in the first two movies combined during my time with douchebag, so that wasn't my worry. My worry was being a girl could I actually bring enough force behind the arm to do anything. Women do usually have less upper body strength than men but sometimes we have more lower body strength, and I knew that to get out of a situation I would need to be able to deliver a decent punch and so I learned. I was never raped but it was close several times and sometimes threatening him got me out of it and other times I had to fight my way out, but yes, I was lucky. I'm tall and while I'm thing, I'm fairly strong and most guys don't expect an actual fight back from a girl, and I never fought like a girl.

I was also in some other situations that I got my own self into with my big mouth that I had to get out of that way too when it turned physical, and of course I never went looking for it or tempting fate, but I had confidence in my own abilities to get out of it after a while.

When I talk about that s**t to other girls on here who are afraid of getting attacked, many times they try and twist my advice to learn to defend yourself and my stories about how I did it into a "blame the victim for not fighting" thing or something. Where they get that, I don't know. It's a suggestion from me though, and a really serious one. Anybody that can't defend themselves physically should learn how to do so to the best of their ability. Adrenaline and basically being scared s**tless and furious will sometimes take care of the rest of it for you if the situation ever happens, which I honestly hope never happens to anybody here.

I'm no badass, but I've learned through experience that standing up for myself, even if I get hurt or my ass beat (that's happened many times from confrontations other than my ex too, but I lived through it and kept myself from getting robbed or raped or killed) that I felt better about myself for standing up to them and each time I had a bit more confidence and hope that I would win if it ever happened again, and you know what? I did win. Quite a few times actually. Surprised the hell out of me too! I never thought I could do anything like that. Ever. But now I get my feeling of safety from myself. I either avoid situations and place that could be like that, and when I can't avoid them, I know I'll do what I can do to save my own ass cause I'm my biggest fan. It's self confidence boosting for real to learn it. I wish people wouldn't get all snotty when I suggest it. It works and I'm suggesting it to them so maybe it'll help, not just so they can go get mad at me for it. Not that I care if they choose to take it that way, it's not like I can control how they take what I say, and I did offer the for real, working advice. So. I wanted to explain that whole self defense thing because the way it was just thrown out there like a dog turd it didn't really sound like what it was.

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I'm giving it another shot. We will see.
My forum is still there and everyone is welcome to come join as well. There is a private women only subforum there if anyone is interested. Also, there is no CAPTCHA.

The link to the forum is http://www.rightplanet.proboards.com

As for meeting girls in a bar, or club; it generally isn't a good idea unless you are the clubbing type. A lot of girls and guys for that matter are less likely to be loyal, especially if you aren't the type to go to the clubs with them. Don't expect to be compatible with someone you meet at a club, unless you like going to clubs.

I'm going to be really snarky here for a minute. Vickygleitz can get his wish for us to stop talking about this subject so much AND the lovelorn could get one step closer to understanding how to be appealing to a woman:

LOVELORN: Demonstrate enough intelligence to scroll down the screen and see that your question has been answered at least three times already just on the first page. If that doesn't work, use the search function. Women generally like intelligence. Practice being intelligent by not asking the same dang question as a hundred other men on this site.

I've learned not to give compliments not even when in a relationship.