Persevero wrote:
Even if the OP is true, I don't find it particularly helpful -- We having nothing to gain from knowing who suffers more, it's not a competition.
Acknowledging that there is pain inherent to failing relationships is important though! But even more so is the ability/resolve to not let it consume you, and yes that is hard at times.
This kind of "get over it" mentality is exactly the problem though. What about those who can't just "get over it" so easily when it comes to chronic loneliness and pain. It's as if it's not suffering enough to experience pain, on top of that you are
wrong to experience it. It's as if you believe people willfully choose to experience something so painful. I've got news for you, they don't. Nobody in their right mind would. It's not a simple choice for everyone. People don't "let themselves" feel pain. They just feel it and have to find ways to cope somehow.
This isn't just a problem with men, many women seem to shun emotionality as well. Everyone promotes this atmosphere of fake plastic "positivity" that's only skin deep. It's the whole society we have. Everything is plastic and skin deep. There is no real happiness, but a social expectation that people hide and bottle up their feelings in order to put on a fake front, all for the sake of others. It doesn't matter what's boiling inside. As long as nobody notices your pain, you're fine and not a burden on them. The message is loud and clear. Don't you DARE be a burden on anyone! If you absolutely must, be sure to kill yourself quietly in some remote area where nobody has to see. What's inside doesn't matter, only what you display. That's what people really mean when they say "get over it". They mean "hide it all inside until you can't take it anymore". f**k no! That's dangerous!
I know somebody who just committed suicide. Nobody knew. He followed this social norm. His mom is insane with grief. So are others who knew him and cared about him. Individualism is a lie!
15 Jul 2014, 6:01 am
