New dating site strategy

Post Reply New Topic

If I lived alone I’d just be alone and depressed all the time , it wouldn’t help me get dates I’d still be disabled and poor just completely alone and cut off from everyone and anyone.

Not necessarily. Living alone can be very relaxing. It's good if you like peace and quiet.

So is this new strategy working?

I dont know I’ve been too sad to use any of the apps

I have basically near zero chance so it’s just a slight chance increase by avoiding women who’d never date me and adhearing to the sites rejection requirements

I think as a guy it's better to date irl through social circle. Women are naturally going to be more picky on online dating platforms due to the larger choice pool, especially when it comes to appearance. I'm not going to be that guy who tells you to lower your standards, it's not fair to the partner if you're not attracted to them. But if you want the thin ladies you should try losing some of those excess pounds. You take any meds?

They’re going be as picky in person as online and I can say that from experience.

I don’t have any social circle and when I did people point blank told me I wasn’t good enough for any of the women they know and some say I not good enough for any women.

Then make yourself better.

I've been told I need to do the online dating route again but I swore off that route years ago. Even when I had hair covering my forehead (My frontal hair has receded) and my face wasn't fat like it is now, I was still ignored by the women I was interested in. I wish I committed suicide back in 2006 when the depression I still suffer from first kicked in if I had known I would still be the same in 2019. I was being told to like myself and work on myself even back then.

I can’t. So it’s this or death. But I can’t kill myself either. Not everyone can just pull themselves up by their boot straps and become wealthy.

f**k dude, I think at this point it's worth considering anti-depressants. It won't make you chad but it might improve you dealing with your current situation.

Online dating is ABYSMAL for males, even for the best of us. I do not recommend people even bother, men are better off cold-approaching in real life.

Keep in mind, for males its a numbers game mixed in with some luck, even in real life, women get offers 24/7 around the clock. So it's a matter of also being lucky, EVEN if you're a well off male. The competition out there is brutal.

Want to see how easy an average girl has it on tinder?



Woo boy. Don't even bother with online dating, if you're an average male it is a graveyard of despair and broken dreams. Online dating would break most men if they rely on it too much.

But as that guy says, the thirst is real. That's why in the other thread Sly, I advised you to self-improve so that you might feel good with yourself as to tolerate loneliness and focus on goals that don't keep women as a focus.

Imagine if you put all the time you spend thinking about a lady to a productive goal or hobby? You can become much more powerful than you realize.



"It's only after we've lost everything that we're free to do anything".

I don’t enjoy anything alone. I have hobbies I spend all my time on and it’s not enjoyable as I have no gf to share it with. I don’t think anyone will ever get it here but for me life without a romantic partner is empty it’s the type of person I am, glad your not that type but it can’t be changed anymore they you can make a gay person straight or an introvert into a social person or vice versa. There is no one way to happiness. I wish people would be as accepting of that as they are other differences

You have described her as average. She is not average. She's in the top 1% as to looks and isn't Tinder for sex anyway?
Average women do not get offers of potential relationships 24/7.

I agree online the numbers are against men but the numbers are due to single women not using it as much as single men because it's a s**t way to get to know someone for a potential relationship. It's apparently a good way to find sex though, which is what a lot of men online are looking for, so if a woman is doing likewise she is going to have plenty of offers.

Don't cold call, seriously, no men actually do this successfully, when NTs appear to do this there is eye contact first, LOTS OF IT, they rarely approach without some reciprocal signal, and when they do or misread the signals they fail.

^I typically look at profiles and all the photos before I swipe and I would say most women that write anything in the profile usually hint to looking for a relationship and often tell people looking for a hook up or FWB to swipe left to save them the trouble. Even living in a tourist destination where I do see women in the area for vacation looking to party. Women that are open about looking for sex would be the minority.

There is nothing that you can do that you can't do with your male peers (except for one thing of course). Getting a group of guys together and just goofing off is a great way to bond with others and create fun times that will make life feel much less lonely.

It's like, for people who have a lifetime of chronic depression (which I come from), they shift their focus away from 'curing' their depression to 'managing' it, and with time they begin to gain leverage over it. Perhaps it doesn't go away completely, nevertheless they can keep it dormant and subdued under a massive amount of discipline. Eating right, talking to people, getting sun and knowing how to have a good laugh will all work in concert to elleviate loneliness, that these things are not entirely suspended to lady.

What you need to do is shift your focus away from 'a lady will save me' to 'how can i mitigate this loneliness?', because no matter how much you try, and you've probably been trying for a very very long time, it isn't working. So for survivals sake, you HAVE to shift your focus. In a sort of twisted way what you hate has become what you love, and it's keeping you inside a kind of prison which you've come to embrace. Happiness isn't suspended in women, and you have to realize that fact. You were like that once when you were a child, you can be care-free like that again.

But I suspect you're going to have to go through a similar process that I went through, which means you'll only change after a tragedy of monumental proportion completely breaks your life and you hit rock-bottom. I was like you in my 20's thinking that only through a lady can I find happiness. But happiness is much more fleeting and elusive than that, all of us on this planet have been born through a man that was with a lady, yet the world is in a miserable state, what does that tell you? That finding a significant partner does not bring happiness. It is EXTRAORDINARILY elusive.

In fact, don't look for happiness, nobody that looks for it directly can find it.

By the way, I do hope that you don't chronically 'mess' with yourself, that is a very easy way to make the loneliness more accute, and pornography is a rampant problem for men these days, especially lonely ones, STAY AWAY from it.



Actually on closer inspection you're right she is fairly above average, my point however still stands:

"the bottom 80% of men (in terms of attractiveness) are competing for the bottom 22% of women and the top 78% of women are competing for the top 20% of men. "

Source: https://medium.com/@worstonlinedater/ti ... df370a6e9a

Bottom 22% of women are competing for the bulk of men, and there are going to be a significant amount of uggos and obese ladies there lol. So my point It would remain true regardless, if he went for an average or even ugly chick he would of gotten a few less responses, but a significant amount of responses nonetheless.

There's not going to be much eye-contact if you're not a good-looking male, plus asking an aspie to do eye-contact might be a bit much. Cold-approaching + doing it lots of time, will eventually mathematically pay off. Plus you can still cold approach with a good ice-breaking line, a male that isn't a specimen is going to have to rely on persistence and cleverness with some combination of luck. Persistence however being the main ingredient because a male will get more clever with experience.

Last edited by SecretOpossumCabal on 24 Apr 2019, 5:28 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Dude, were it not for online dating I never would have had a single girlfriend.