The_Face_of_Boo
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Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 42
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,084
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
27 May 2020, 10:27 am
Karamazov wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Who's Karamazov btw?
Dunno mate
I don’t like the sound of him.
I mean, what type of pretentious weirdo goes round naming themselves after nineteenth century novels?
______________________
Thanks for kind words teach
... think I may have to blush for a spot.
I was thinking of a Russian user instead.
27 May 2020, 10:42 am
magz wrote:
I'm sure she's smart enough to recognize your sense of humor 
Good point
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
I was thinking of a Russian user instead.
Ahh...
yes, I have had PMs asking if I’m Russia. Maybe I should have picked a name from an English novel, but too late now However, I was mostly concerned with the opportunity for jollity
The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 42
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,084
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
27 May 2020, 10:47 am
27 May 2020, 10:50 am
Teach51
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Joined: 28 Jan 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,808
Location: Where angels do not fear to tread.
27 May 2020, 10:51 am
Teach51
Veteran
Joined: 28 Jan 2019
Gender: Female
Posts: 2,808
Location: Where angels do not fear to tread.
27 May 2020, 10:53 am
The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 42
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,084
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
27 May 2020, 10:54 am
27 May 2020, 10:58 am
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Karamazov wrote:
^ £250 cash will do nicely, no need to beg.
Like what sly said.
Better to buy a console instead.
How dare you compare my illegible scrawl to a digital entertainment device!?!
I’m so insulted it’s not even true
The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 42
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,084
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
27 May 2020, 2:53 pm
Karamazov wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Karamazov wrote:
^ £250 cash will do nicely, no need to beg.
Like what sly said.
Better to buy a console instead.
How dare you compare my illegible scrawl to a digital entertainment device!?!
I’m so insulted it’s not even true
Be glad I didn’t compare it to something else. ie. underwear.
27 May 2020, 3:00 pm
27 May 2020, 3:01 pm
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Karamazov wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Karamazov wrote:
^ £250 cash will do nicely, no need to beg.
Like what sly said.
Better to buy a console instead.
How dare you compare my illegible scrawl to a digital entertainment device!?!
I’m so insulted it’s not even true
Be glad I didn’t compare it to something else. ie. underwear.
Well, that would entirely depend on the type of underwear.
27 May 2020, 3:28 pm
magz wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
Be glad I didn’t compare it to something else. ie. underwear.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5-hYbbDkEZI
Warning: before you see the explicit content of this video, your brain will boil from its stupidity.
My brain didn’t boil, I assumed it was a children’s cartoon until the end.
The_Face_of_Boo
Veteran
Joined: 16 Jun 2010
Age: 42
Gender: Non-binary
Posts: 33,084
Location: Beirut, Lebanon.
27 May 2020, 4:59 pm
27 May 2020, 5:38 pm
Teach51 wrote:
The evolution of this thread has totally baffled me, this is partly because not being an aspie obviously my thought processing and experience of life is totally different. It suddenly dawned on me what is lacking in these threads.
There are lengthy lamentations regarding demographics and statistics and you all have entangled me in that mindset, so I started thinking which professional women would be compatible with aspies, how you would meet good women but then I realised what was lacking.
Finding a woman, where, how, what nationality is really not the issue.
The common denominator that the married aspies or those in a long term relationship share here, K, Bender, Kraftie, Fnord, you know who they all are, they all have the capacity to project their caring on to others, relate to others lives, express empathy in their own way, overcome difficulties and maintain a long term intimate relationship.
A long term relationship is similar to a career, it's easy enough to begin but sustaining it is the hard part.
Finding the right woman is not like an acquisition, it's not like buying a new computer, finding the right price, design and performance. You order it, bring it home, mission accomplished. Noooooo. A woman wants and needs many things beyond the material aspects of life. So much more.
I am guessing Fnord and Bender and all the guys that have been encouraging the younger guys here for years have said it in every possible way.
I wanted to be a nurse when I was a girl. That was my objective. That was not enough. . That is just a desire . Next I had to convert my desire into a practical strategy. So I went to nursing school, studied anatomy and physiology, all the necessary stuff I am really bad at understanding, I actually hate science because my mind is so disorganised and I have a severe learning disability, but I invested 4 years to achieve my goal. I had to force myself to internalize all these strategies and analyses that my mind refused to understand and process efficiently. A bit like aspies and emotional communication perhaps?
Wanting a relationship will not bring you nearer to having a successful one, it's just a desire, it requires implementing a plan of action in order to fulfill this desire.
Maintaining a relationship requires the ability to feel that another human being is as important as yourself, to think outside yourself make them feel appreciated and valued, learn how to listen and understand them, learn how to adapt to sharing your time and your space. If you begin to do this then your whole experience of human interaction will change, women will sense that you are emotionally present and be able to connect with you. They will find substance to connect to emotionally. Try and develop expressing the care that you feel so deeply internally into an external verbal expression of feeling, even if it is just memorizing phrases that suit the moment. Learn to ask questions if you have no idea how to interpret what your partner is feeling so that they can sense you care. Learn to verbalize your feelings more.
This all demands a great investment of time, effort and determination to achieve your goal but it will assist you in every interpersonal interaction. Nothing suddenly materializes just because we want it, learn how to make the emotional connection in your own unique way, if you can.
I promise to let this go now and keep my perhaps misguided advice to myself.
There are lengthy lamentations regarding demographics and statistics and you all have entangled me in that mindset, so I started thinking which professional women would be compatible with aspies, how you would meet good women but then I realised what was lacking.
Finding a woman, where, how, what nationality is really not the issue.
The common denominator that the married aspies or those in a long term relationship share here, K, Bender, Kraftie, Fnord, you know who they all are, they all have the capacity to project their caring on to others, relate to others lives, express empathy in their own way, overcome difficulties and maintain a long term intimate relationship.
A long term relationship is similar to a career, it's easy enough to begin but sustaining it is the hard part.
Finding the right woman is not like an acquisition, it's not like buying a new computer, finding the right price, design and performance. You order it, bring it home, mission accomplished. Noooooo. A woman wants and needs many things beyond the material aspects of life. So much more.
I am guessing Fnord and Bender and all the guys that have been encouraging the younger guys here for years have said it in every possible way.
I wanted to be a nurse when I was a girl. That was my objective. That was not enough. . That is just a desire . Next I had to convert my desire into a practical strategy. So I went to nursing school, studied anatomy and physiology, all the necessary stuff I am really bad at understanding, I actually hate science because my mind is so disorganised and I have a severe learning disability, but I invested 4 years to achieve my goal. I had to force myself to internalize all these strategies and analyses that my mind refused to understand and process efficiently. A bit like aspies and emotional communication perhaps?
Wanting a relationship will not bring you nearer to having a successful one, it's just a desire, it requires implementing a plan of action in order to fulfill this desire.
Maintaining a relationship requires the ability to feel that another human being is as important as yourself, to think outside yourself make them feel appreciated and valued, learn how to listen and understand them, learn how to adapt to sharing your time and your space. If you begin to do this then your whole experience of human interaction will change, women will sense that you are emotionally present and be able to connect with you. They will find substance to connect to emotionally. Try and develop expressing the care that you feel so deeply internally into an external verbal expression of feeling, even if it is just memorizing phrases that suit the moment. Learn to ask questions if you have no idea how to interpret what your partner is feeling so that they can sense you care. Learn to verbalize your feelings more.
This all demands a great investment of time, effort and determination to achieve your goal but it will assist you in every interpersonal interaction. Nothing suddenly materializes just because we want it, learn how to make the emotional connection in your own unique way, if you can.
I promise to let this go now and keep my perhaps misguided advice to myself.
Never felt empathy or compassion from fnord.
Are you trying to say the reason I’m alone is cause I’m not like them?
I’m one of the most empathic , caring loving person you could meet. I don’t even hurt bugs. The other thing all the people you listed have in common is they work full time good jobs.
I’ve been told I’d be the perfect bf by women. I don’t think I’d have issue sustaining a relationship. I just can’t get a f*****g chance. No woman will, give me a chance. I can’t get dates. Women don’t even let me talk to them, if I can’t get dates then I’ll never get a relationship. So Please don’t judge me as not able to sustain a relationship I have all the qualities to do so more so then most men. But I not good enough cause I work min wage part time.
27 May 2020, 5:41 pm
Pepe wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Pepe wrote:
sly279 wrote:
Pepe wrote:
Teach51 wrote:
If I was an aspie man here's what I would do:
I would go and volunteer in an animal shelter, or if I was religious I would do something to help the needy that was affiliated to my place of worship or some other cause I was passionate about requiring compassion and empathy . I would express my compassion in a practical sense if I couldn't verbalize it. I would think there would be a fair amount of smart, caring women volunteering also who I could get to know more than superficially for a lengthy period of interaction who would grow to love, my aspie attributes.
That's what I would do.
I would go and volunteer in an animal shelter, or if I was religious I would do something to help the needy that was affiliated to my place of worship or some other cause I was passionate about requiring compassion and empathy . I would express my compassion in a practical sense if I couldn't verbalize it. I would think there would be a fair amount of smart, caring women volunteering also who I could get to know more than superficially for a lengthy period of interaction who would grow to love, my aspie attributes.
That's what I would do.
Yup,
Religious women may be easier pickings.
My first "girlfriend" was driven by compassion, through her religious indoctrination.
I would also recommend hobby courses and interest groups such as logic classes, bushwalking or arts and crafts, etc, after the CV event.
In the past, I have recommended local autism groups.
Joining an activity which is of interest to "you" is a possible win-win situation.
Hobby courses are expensive. I’d rather spend $300 on console I can use for years then on one pot making class.
I totally agree.
A console is a much better investment than an erky perky girl-germ infested girlfriend.
Much, much, much cheaper also.
Eh I didn’t say that. But paying $300 for hobby class won’t lead to a gf. Any women there would likely see I work min wage and pass. So I’d be throwing money away.
I see you have a defeatist attitude.
*That's* the spirit!
Gurlies like to dance.
Have you considered investing in a pink tutu and white pantyhose?
I don't think that costs anywhere near $US300.
There are other activities that don't cost a lot on money.
Bushwalking, for instance.
Join Extinction Rebellion and wear some "Puppy Dog" eyes, while saving the planet.
The progressive women luv that sort of thing.
Or, as 51(?) said, help out at a soup kitchen for homless people.
Easy peasy.
I live in real world everything cost money. Nothings free.
I’m in a city without a car(cost money) I can’t get to the forest to bush walk.
There’s no volunteer work in my city and to get to the next city takes hours and cost money. I’m not going spend hours on bus to volunteer and cost me money.
27 May 2020, 7:51 pm
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