If you're 27 and never had a girlfriend, is it too late?

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Sly279- What I would do is consider the source and leave it like that. Those who act that way towards others are just a projection of their true inner selves. Think of it as a mirror that shows what they really look like to others, something very ugly that they cannot hide from.

Why? Why do those who tell you what an absolute piece of s**t you are have to be projecting themselves, or doing some other unlikely thing which wastes their time and denotes weakness, convenient for dismissing them? Why can't they just be right?

so if they have nothing better to do with their lives, but to spend time here and to return here again and again after they've been banned for about 20 times, just to tell others what a profound losers they are, what does it say about them?

if they're so much better, why waste time here making people even more miserable than they are? Are they really any better?

I'm not privy to anyone's ban history, and I have no reason to disbelieve PillowSpider left her parents' home at 17 and has been earning her keep ever since, living independently, getting a good education and having had well-paying jobs for quite a few years by now. This alone is more than enough of a reason to have no respect for someone like me, so I can understand how sickening it might be to her if I considered myself worthy of a partner. She's simply reminding us the obvious.

I've been taught to think very conscientiously about what someone tells me when they're critizicing me, especially if they do it harshly, so I can understand how they're right. If they show anger or impatience, there must be a good reason for it. It's important for me to find out that reason so I learn precisely what kind of dimwitted behavior I'm indulging in that rightly pisses them off.

Do you think she immediately started paying full rent with money she earned herself? More likely she just moved into a friends house and paid minimal board. The amount of money it takes to support oneself, including paying rent, would require a full-time job. 17 is school age with a lot of homework.

Think about it. Her daily schedule. 7 hours at school, 5 hours of homework... I know a student who does this and works part time, just a few hours at McDonald's after school. He gets my respect. 7 hours + 5 hours + 3 hours at McDonald's? That's a 15 hour day.

But do you think PillowSpider was in high school with a full time job? Did she work an 8 hour night-shift? 7 hours + 5 hours + 8 hours is a 20 hour day. I don't think so.So she's in university and working a well-payed job? With plenty of overtime I supposed. Followed by full time study all night? And yet she still finds time to to come here and insult people? Yeah right!

She's probably some unemployed dork sitting in his mom's basement who's taking out his frustrations by insulting people similar to him.I've been trying to deal with this problem myself. The problem with comparing yourself to other people is that you end up creating some impossible perfect version of other people, then telling yourself that impossibly high standard is normal and average and then comparing yourself to that.

The impossibly perfect person does not exist so you that means you can't really fall short of that made up standard. So don't compare yourself to someone who is a full-time worker, full-time university student, has an active social-life, parties every night and still finds time to troll WP. All those activities would take about 40 hours per day. That person can't possibly exist.

I used to think every young person has a job and studies and a full-time social life and parties and volunteers and goes backpacking across Europe with their many friends and plays a sport and has a hobby and still has time to master every online game.

I realized that there are people who do all of those things. Everyone of those things has someone who does it but in my head I was thinking that people do all of those things. I mean all of those activities for the same person. Like I was combining all the different people into one person and then saying everyone is like that and then saying that is average and if I fall short of that standard I must be below average.

Basically I had unwittingly created a composite of all the people I knew, all of whom were good at one thing, not everything.

So don't do that. Don't compare yourself with imaginary perfect people who can't possible exist.[/quote][/quote]Yeah there's a reason for it, it's called projection. Someone is pissed off at themselves for failing so they take it out on guys who are similar to them. It's like PillowSpider is punishing himself by proxy. Like he wants everyone else to be his whipping boy and take his punishment for him.

We don't know. Successful people can be jerks too. Maybe she had some sort of well paying job that involved dealing with socially awkward financially unstable men. That would explain why she doesn't like us.

The way I read it, she was not saying she wants anyone to die, but there are members who think they themselves should die (and that they talk about it):

"Maybe I should ... b***h [that] members of the opposite sex want nothing to do with me because I'm ..."

That's her pretending to be someone else saying bad things about themselves. Not her saying bad things about someone else.

shes describing me and others though. sorry but her words used are too close to a 100% description of us up until the bit about shark and bacon.

that is what she thinks of us shes made it clear in her other attacks. she thinks were pathetic losers.
who stay in our tiny rooms and talk to no one and do nothing but complain. she was mocking us.
you dont' see that because you're not her target her target is loser aspie men who lack at socializing so stay in our homes and have very little contact with people.

though given how often she and others have described us as such. i really am confused how you don't catch it. though perhaps you just feel instinct to defend women any women. i've noticed women always seem to jump to the defense of other women even when they'll doing bad stuff. it confuses me.

she as real contempt for us. she wants us to stop sharing our troubles ie complaining and get off here. but that is what this site is for not for nt who had bad relationship with an aspie to come and share how bad aspies are and should be avoided.

whatever though she'll be back. then attack one of us again and be banned and repeat it endlessly.
maybe one of her victims will kill themselves and she'll get investigated for cyber bullying. shame that that is likely the only way she'll be stopped.

You are a very educated, nice, intelligent and from what I've seen in the game threads funny person. I respect you for that and I don't see the reason why should you allow anyone to walk over you or treat you like s**t.

Is she any better simply because she claims to be independent ever since she was 17? So, value of a person depends solely on whether they're living independently or not?

Sorry but that's BS. You're just as worthy and deserving of respect like anyone else, even more so becuase of the knowledge you display in so many areas....can she speak so many languages proficently? be well versed in science as well as linguistics?

She's one bitchy and mean person who has nothing better to do but to proselyze and be extremely rude, mean and condescending to those she finds annoying. If anyone should take a look at their behaviour it's her, not you, or anyone like you. And I don't really see anything wrong with you btw, despite what you or she says.

If they show anger or impatience, why should it have anything to do with you? it could be she's having a bad day, is bereft of sleep or simply is a bitchy person.

Why shouldn't you also be allowed to show anger or impatience towards such people, so they could learn how to display more benevolent and tolerant behaviour?

btw kayteekay, i know you've probably made another account today already, but i'll keep on banning you every other day if necessary.

although I don't really look at porn anymore, I still masturbate a lot, this article right here says a lot:https://www.reddit.com/r/NoFap/comments/1f4rth/i_was_reading_models_by_mark_manson_again_and/

Hey Sly,

Don't you see--this Pillow person is obviously somebody with an axe to grind--toward him/herself! Perhaps this is a guy in a basement who doesn't feel too good about that fact that he's in a basement.

Just ignore him/her. Really. It's no use responding to him/her.

It's all just WORDS, anyway, Sly.

I guess I got a bit carried away when I wrote my last post here. However, as long as something is just words, I think the best thing you can do with them is examine them critically. If you find a shoe that fits, it doesn't really matter whom the words came from. Just do what is appropriate to better yourself. If what you're reading or hearing is something already repeated countless times with no new substance, stop wasting your time and find something better to pay attention to.

Most of what she says is not wrong though.

I go to meetings of a discussion group. There is a hot 61 year old woman who comes to the meetings. There is some chemistry between us. The last meeting I went to she sat next to me. I remembered things about her from previous meetings. So I asked her about her cats, her writing, and her firefighting job. See I wasn't just talking about myself. At the end of the dinner she hugged me. I had achieved hug status! I am not sure if she is single. She textes with someone on her phone. She works with firemen and as I said, she is hot. Likelihood of not having a significant other almost nil. But; 1. Older women can be hotties!, 2. I am not repulsive to women (Mainly because I think positive.) 3. I will be found attractive to women who are available. 4. Just because one particular woman does not end up being a girlfriend doesn't mean I am a failure. You should enjoy the steps along the way and the people you meet.

Yes, there are people who need to get off their butts. I, for one, need a good kick now and again.

But berating people, without offering constructive solutions, is really not the way to go.

It's to encourage them. Provide something constructive for them to do/think about. Accentuate the positive; Screw the negative.

Offer solutions, rather than just hot air.