Bigotry against involuntarily celibate men

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sly279
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27 Nov 2018, 7:11 pm

hurtloam wrote:
I'm guessing sly doesn't live near his gym and has to take a bus there. My gym is literally 5 -10 min drive from my house.

By the time he comes home from work, has something to eat, gets the bus to the gym, works out, gets the bus home, the evening is gone. But then sly, you do work part time so have more free time than those of us who work full time.


Except my part time job takes up the same time as someone working 8 hour shifts who drives.
So I don’t have more free time.
4 hour shift is 8 hours with travel time. If I drove I could be there in 10-15 mins. Bus takes 2 hours.
I don’t get home until 10:30
In order to go to the gym I have to be up at 8 am. Meaning to get enough sleep I should be sleeping at 12 or earlier. Doesn’t leave me much time to eat and such.
I tried it for few weeks but it was much too stressful and depressing to be doing nothing I enjoyed and just working and gym every day.
There’s nothing but expensive grocery stores in my area, everything else is in town.



sly279
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27 Nov 2018, 7:15 pm

RetroGamer87 wrote:
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
sly279 wrote:
The Grand Inquisitor wrote:
KingGhidorah87 wrote:
I wm sorry because I haven’t found your post stating this, but how old is sly exactly?
I myself am 18 and have no job at all, but attend college and have had no problem with women. However, I am in college. A 50 year old virgin who still works in retail and plays video games all the rest of the time may be more of a problem for most women.

Also, I can confirm that too much gaming is usually to fill a hole in your life. In HS, it took up all my free time due to lack of social acceptance (autism was mostly not a factor, generally intolerance of interracial relationships and jealousy at my academ8c prowess were more common). I gound my home in college, haven’t gamed in months, and only feel a tiny bit of desire to return.

Sly is 30 working part-time retail. I'd imagine he doesn't earn enough to move out of his parents' house bc even if he wanted to, hence my sighting that as a problem.


I could get a place on my own but why?
I’d be totally secluded from all human contact besides work. Doesn’t seem
That’d be a benifit to my mental health and I’d cause my family to become homeless and they’d hate me for it. So I’d be cut off from my family who is the last humans alive who care about me

Because most women don't want to date a guy who's 30 and living with his parents. Also, independence, and you could move to another city/state where the man to woman ratio isnt so skewed.

Then again there's Asian women. I've had Asian women get mad at me for not living with my parents.

"Why did you leave your mother to live alone?" is what some of them said to me. Asian women would truly respect you for staying home to look after your parents (not that other people shouldn't).


In Korea I guess they are still traidtional so the parents move in with the kids and so do their parents and so on. Generations living under the same roof, think Walton’s, west use to be the same but we aren’t anymore and neither are westernized Asians which are the ones I see since the USA isn’t near Asia like Australia is.



kraftiekortie
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27 Nov 2018, 7:15 pm

Can you read on the bus, Sly?

I can't, actually, though I can go on my phone a little.



sly279
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27 Nov 2018, 7:16 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
Can you read on the bus, Sly?

I can't, actually, though I can go on my phone a little.

Pretty much all my posting here is done on the bus.
I read here or Facebook and listen to music.



SpiceWolf
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27 Nov 2018, 7:25 pm

Sly, have you considered a push-bike.
Fairly cheap to buy, gets you fit (no Gym needed), and if it takes 15 minutes in a car it will take you about 30 minutes max on a bike, no more waiting for, paying for, buses.


sly279 wrote:
4 hour shift is 8 hours with travel time. If I drove I could be there in 10-15 mins. Bus takes 2 hours.
I don’t get home until 10:30



kraftiekortie
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27 Nov 2018, 7:31 pm

I don't get the feeling a push-bike would work on the roads Sly has to travel. They're very car-oriented. And car drivers really don't like sharing the road with bikes.



RetroGamer87
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27 Nov 2018, 9:10 pm

auntblabby wrote:
^^^ you are fortunate to be able to afford to live close to civilization.

Living far from civilization could have its advantages.


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27 Nov 2018, 9:12 pm

xDominiel wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
I wish I could still run, I miss it so. it kept me sane when I needed all the help I could get.

I know the feeling. I used to go for long walks almost nightly. Those were pretty dark times, and yet I can think almost fondly back at them because of those walks, among other things.

Saaame!! The best times from my depression where when I walked for hours at 3:00AM


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auntblabby
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27 Nov 2018, 10:34 pm

RetroGamer87 wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
^^^ you are fortunate to be able to afford to live close to civilization.

Living far from civilization could have its advantages.

the advantage is relative peace and quiet. also lower cost of living. those are the only ones I can think of.



Aspie19828
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27 Nov 2018, 10:47 pm

The town/city where you live in can make a huge difference. A town/city with a huge amount of single males compared to single females will make it hard for most guys to find a date or form relationships. In a town/city where there are more females than males it will be easier for guys to find a date and form a relationship. Take Australia for example: Sydney and Adelaide have a slightly higher amount of females than males, Brisbane and Melbourne gender ratio is roughly the same , Canberra and Perth have a slightly higher amount of males than females. It is easier for guys to find dates in Sydney and Adelaide due to being more available females than males. It is harder for single males to find dates in Canberra and Perth due to less available females than males. Factors like: status/income, right personality, physical attractiveness, shared interests and style play roles in attracting others.



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28 Nov 2018, 1:26 am

Aspie19828 wrote:
The town/city where you live in can make a huge difference. A town/city with a huge amount of single males compared to single females will make it hard for most guys to find a date or form relationships. In a town/city where there are more females than males it will be easier for guys to find a date and form a relationship. Take Australia for example: Sydney and Adelaide have a slightly higher amount of females than males, Brisbane and Melbourne gender ratio is roughly the same , Canberra and Perth have a slightly higher amount of males than females. It is easier for guys to find dates in Sydney and Adelaide due to being more available females than males. It is harder for single males to find dates in Canberra and Perth due to less available females than males. Factors like: status/income, right personality, physical attractiveness, shared interests and style play roles in attracting others.

Well that's good news for me! :D


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xDominiel
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28 Nov 2018, 8:53 am

Aspie19828 wrote:
The town/city where you live in can make a huge difference. A town/city with a huge amount of single males compared to single females will make it hard for most guys to find a date or form relationships. In a town/city where there are more females than males it will be easier for guys to find a date and form a relationship. Take Australia for example: Sydney and Adelaide have a slightly higher amount of females than males, Brisbane and Melbourne gender ratio is roughly the same , Canberra and Perth have a slightly higher amount of males than females. It is easier for guys to find dates in Sydney and Adelaide due to being more available females than males. It is harder for single males to find dates in Canberra and Perth due to less available females than males. Factors like: status/income, right personality, physical attractiveness, shared interests and style play roles in attracting others.

Robots would solve a lot of these problems. You know, just saying, just putting that out there. I for one will welcome our new (and cute) AI overlords with open arms. Get working on it, fellow humans. Beep. Boop.



magnetowasright
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28 Nov 2018, 9:22 am

I have no social skills and extreme anxiety because of my autism. I cannot get a decent job so I am always broke. I don't have any family who is present or in a position which allows them to help me when things do go wrong. I have very few friends, and they are often too busy with their own lives. I owe tens of thousands of dollars in student loans which I have no means of paying, and my credit score is in the toilet. I'm fat. I'm average looking at best. I have a high pitched voice that makes everyone mistake me for a woman, and I can't even grow a proper beard.

I am 36 years old and should have much accomplished by my age which I don't.

So even if I could find a lady I like who isn't already taken, what would I have to offer her?



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28 Nov 2018, 9:30 am

magnetowasright wrote:
... no social skills ... extreme anxiety ... autism ... cannot get a decent job ... always broke ... don't have any family (to help me when things do go wrong) ... very few friends ... owe tens of thousands of dollars ... no means of paying ... my credit score is in the toilet ... fat ... average looking at best ... a high pitched voice ... everyone mistake me for a woman ... can't even grow a proper beard...
With all of those causes going against you, why do you think that there is bigotry against you for being celibate?

Both the bigotry and the celibacy are correlative effects of the causes you mentioned.



magnetowasright
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28 Nov 2018, 4:54 pm

Fnord wrote:
magnetowasright wrote:
... no social skills ... extreme anxiety ... autism ... cannot get a decent job ... always broke ... don't have any family (to help me when things do go wrong) ... very few friends ... owe tens of thousands of dollars ... no means of paying ... my credit score is in the toilet ... fat ... average looking at best ... a high pitched voice ... everyone mistake me for a woman ... can't even grow a proper beard...
With all of those causes going against you, why do you think that there is bigotry against you for being celibate?

Both the bigotry and the celibacy are correlative effects of the causes you mentioned.


I was specifically referring to attitudes of calling people like me names like "loser" or declaring that all lonely men are misogynists, specifically because of our single status.



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28 Nov 2018, 5:13 pm

magnetowasright wrote:
Fnord wrote:
magnetowasright wrote:
... no social skills ... extreme anxiety ... autism ... cannot get a decent job ... always broke ... don't have any family (to help me when things do go wrong) ... very few friends ... owe tens of thousands of dollars ... no means of paying ... my credit score is in the toilet ... fat ... average looking at best ... a high pitched voice ... everyone mistake me for a woman ... can't even grow a proper beard...
With all of those causes going against you, why do you think that there is bigotry against you for being celibate? Both the bigotry and the celibacy are correlative effects of the causes you mentioned.
I was specifically referring to attitudes of calling people like me names like "loser" or declaring that all lonely men are misogynists, specifically because of our single status.
The only "losers" are those who have given up.

Never give up.

Work on the things you can improve, and worry about the others later.