Question for the women (NT and Aspie)

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Magnus
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22 Jan 2010, 1:00 am

ToadOfSteel wrote:

biostructure wrote:

I don't (in person) know a single woman who I don't think could easily get sex *tonight*, just by extending an offer to all her male friends. They would have no need to approach strangers, go to bars, etc. unless they wanted to. Though the more time I spend on this board, the more I'm beginning to question how much this has to do with them being female.

And again, you're making assumptions. Some women are afraid to because they're scared of men like you, who are definitely out there. Women are much more easily taken advantage of than men are. Women get stuck with a lot more of the consequences as well, and in this still-admittedly misogynistic society, they get stuck with a lot of the social issues...

So don't go thinking a woman could just go out and sleep with any man they wanted, because women, unlike men, can't (and shouldn't) make such decisions lightly...

Women don't have a hard time getting men to sleep with them. Women feel love when they make love more so than men. Are you like a woman? The male/lesbian complex?

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ToadOfSteel
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22 Jan 2010, 1:02 am

Magnus wrote:

Women don't have a hard time getting men to sleep with them. Women feel love when they make love more so than men. Are you like a woman? The male/lesbian complex?

No. I can assure you that I am, in fact, a man.

But that does bring up an interesting point on your own assumptions about men: because I'm not macho, and open with my emotions, I can't possibly be a man?

therange
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22 Jan 2010, 1:03 am

Toad, I must say, for all the sh*t I give you, I think you're closer to having that special someone than the other complainers on here. You have realistic standards (You like her, she likes you), you want a woman for the right reasons, and you don't have any bitterness. You're much like I was...you've internalized everything to the point where you're your own worst enemy. Once you snap out of that routine - and I hope you're brave enough to get the professional help you need - you will be ok. Some guys on here, they know who they are, have a long way to go before even thinking about talking to the opposite sex, and their reasons for wanting the opposite sex are dubious at best.

Magnus
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22 Jan 2010, 1:09 am

ToadOfSteel wrote:

Magnus wrote:

Women don't have a hard time getting men to sleep with them. Women feel love when they make love more so than men. Are you like a woman? The male/lesbian complex?

The "male lesbian" does not think of himself to be "a woman trapped inside the body of a man". However, they deeply envy the prerogatives of the female gender and truly believed that these prerogatives fitted their own inborn temperaments far more than the pattern of behavioral expectations to which males are required to adhere.

therange
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22 Jan 2010, 1:13 am

So Magnus, according to your theory, men are either macho pigs, or they're male lesbians? The guys I tend to get along with have male interests but aren't alpha or macho. We don't sit around all day talking about how women have it better than men, and I doubt Toad does either.

ToadOfSteel
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22 Jan 2010, 1:14 am

therange wrote:

Well, part of that is that my ex-girlfriend is warming up to me considerably as of late. She told me that her breaking up with me was basically a reflex action because she has quite a bit of attachment anxiety (she doesn't like being tied down, metaphorically speaking), and she told me that her feelings for me were in fact real, so I no longer feel that burden of not being able to win a woman's affection, because, well... i have.

Unfortunately, that same attachment anxiety means that a relationship never would have worked out anyway, and probably wont unless she can overcome that. She still has a few years of mental maturing left to do (as do I), so there is still hope, but neither of us are holding our breath. At least we're close friends again (and still have some level of feelings for each other). But the important thing related to me is that I really have succeeded, and success brings that confidence that you claim is so important...

therange
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22 Jan 2010, 1:22 am

Why depend on this woman though? Why not just use it as a stepping stone to meet other women?

ToadOfSteel
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22 Jan 2010, 1:23 am

I don't know any other women in my age range

therange
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22 Jan 2010, 1:26 am

I don't either, any single women that are my type anyway. And I have to stop relying on dating sites, especially now that I have the confidence and speaking ability to converse with a random stranger.

ToadOfSteel
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22 Jan 2010, 1:29 am

therange wrote:

I'm not quite there yet. I can hold a conversation with someone i know fairly well (which is why my dating pool is basically any female friends I have that show any signs of attraction to me), but i can't talk to a stranger to save my life unless it's in a familiar social setting (such as a newcomer to my church). Needless to say, I'm not going to be making any significant amount of money anytime soon either because I have a panic attack every time i try to walk into a job interview...

biostructure
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22 Jan 2010, 1:30 am

Magnus wrote:

Women don't have a hard time getting men to sleep with them.

That's what I thought... but I'm not so sure anymore.

hale_bopp
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22 Jan 2010, 1:39 am

therange wrote:

I think Toad will be fine as soon as he gets over this self worthlessness complex.

Magnus
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22 Jan 2010, 1:44 am

hale_bopp wrote:

therange wrote:

I think Toad will be fine as soon as he gets over this self worthlessness complex.

I tried making a thread for him and people like him here. It got moved to the social skills forum.

http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt117338.html

SporadSpontan
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22 Jan 2010, 2:34 am

Magnus wrote:

Yeah, I should become a madam. I see a potential for healing and cash. No, I don't want to be an escort, I fall in love too easily. SporadSpartan, where are you?

lol! Yeah I'm the same - I'd fall in love too easily. Then you wouldn't make much money out of me because I'd be giving too much away for free!

btw - Toad, I noticed you changed your signature. Personally I liked your old one better - but that's just me. EDIT: And I'm glad you're feeling a bit better about your situation.

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gypsyRN
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23 Jan 2010, 12:07 pm

hale_bopp wrote:

biostructure wrote:

I think the question is, why don't more women obsess over our gender? I think part of the answer is a supply and demand issue. There are so many more men looking for sex or dates that women never get desperate.

Sounds like someone needs a biology lesson. Do you know there is a 50/50 chance of the gender of a new born baby? Guess what that means? Theres approximately the same amount of women and men in the world.

Being a bio-nerd, I need to point out that this statistic is wrong. There are more male babies conceived that female babies, there are slightly more male babies born than female babies, but by the time they're all at reproductive age, the balance has reached 50/50.

Here's a short explanation:
http://www.applet-magic.com/sexratio.htm

You can basically think of it as the skinny kid getting there first.

Tim_Tex
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23 Jan 2010, 12:15 pm

gypsyRN wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

biostructure wrote:

I always thought that women outnumbered men worldwide.

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