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How to improve your chances with women.

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amazon_television
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26 Nov 2010, 12:16 am

katzefrau wrote:

sorry to whomever i offended above. i wanted to give the perspective as it might be from the other side, not to imply that men do not genuinely befriend women. of course they do and can and can make great friends. it's simply absurd to coin a phrase for using a man for friendship.. when it could just as easily be interpreted as cruel or exploitive to befriend a woman whose friendship is not really what you want. what is the word for that? there isn't one, as we don't assume it is ill-intentioned or claim we've been "f*ck zoned" or something when men go cold on our friendships suddenly. imagine how that would feel?


I like your perspective, and I think it's largely true, but there is a flip side to it. If you want to read about how a man who has been "f*ck zoned" feels, read my post in the FWB thread in adult issues. It may not be "the same" (how would I know?) but it happens.


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Tim_Tex
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26 Nov 2010, 12:21 am

What if said good looking/charismatic guy is a serial cheater and user?

Also, people's personalities aren't always the same IRL as they are online.


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hale_bopp
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26 Nov 2010, 12:25 am

Tim_Tex wrote:
What if said good looking/charismatic guy is a serial cheater and user?


To a lot of people thats not worse than said guy being average looking with below par social skills.
In my opinion they're both pretty bad but a lot of NT women will think worse of the aspergers guy.

ALSO

The same with women.

A lot of men don't care if someone is average looking with bad social skills, but very intelligent and caring
They will often take someone ditzy with a lot of friends who cheats.

Same thing applies. You can complain about how "immoral" it is, or you can accept that its just the way it is.



katzefrau
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26 Nov 2010, 12:27 am

amazon_television wrote:
katzefrau wrote:

sorry to whomever i offended above. i wanted to give the perspective as it might be from the other side, not to imply that men do not genuinely befriend women. of course they do and can and can make great friends. it's simply absurd to coin a phrase for using a man for friendship.. when it could just as easily be interpreted as cruel or exploitive to befriend a woman whose friendship is not really what you want. what is the word for that? there isn't one, as we don't assume it is ill-intentioned or claim we've been "f*ck zoned" or something when men go cold on our friendships suddenly. imagine how that would feel?


I like your perspective, and I think it's largely true, but there is a flip side to it. If you want to read about how a man who has been "f*ck zoned" feels, read my post in the FWB thread in adult issues. It may not be "the same" (how would I know?) but it happens.


i'm sure any bad behavior one could accuse a man of doing a woman could do and vice versa. there is just too much bitterness here and people are too quick to classify behavior based on a few lone jerks. the bitterness is actually what drives people away.

people think they are on the defense but they are really playing offense with each other.


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ToadOfSteel
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26 Nov 2010, 12:31 am

katzefrau wrote:
i'm sure any bad behavior one could accuse a man of doing a woman could do and vice versa. there is just too much bitterness here and people are too quick to classify behavior based on a few lone jerks. the bitterness is actually what drives people away.

people think they are on the defense but they are really playing offense with each other.


The problem is we live in a society where showing respect only earns you contempt, and, strangely enough, vice versa...



Tim_Tex
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26 Nov 2010, 12:32 am

hale_bopp wrote:
Tim_Tex wrote:
What if said good looking/charismatic guy is a serial cheater and user?


To a lot of people thats not worse than said guy being average looking with below par social skills.
In my opinion they're both pretty bad but a lot of NT women will think worse of the aspergers guy.

ALSO

The same with women.

A lot of men don't care if someone is average looking with bad social skills, but very intelligent and caring
They will often take someone ditzy with a lot of friends who cheats.

Same thing applies. You can complain about how "immoral" it is, or you can accept that its just the way it is.


And what he is saying is just a bunch of generalizations anyway.

And I changed my point of view after being cheated out of a potential relationship based on generalizations someone made about me.


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menintights
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26 Nov 2010, 12:35 am

ToadOfSteel wrote:
The problem is we live in a society where showing respect only earns you contempt, and, strangely enough, vice versa...


Sounds like something a Nice Guy (TM) would say.

In other news, I like the direction this thread is taking. I'm gonna go get some popcorn now.



katzefrau
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26 Nov 2010, 12:36 am

ToadOfSteel wrote:
katzefrau wrote:
i'm sure any bad behavior one could accuse a man of doing a woman could do and vice versa. there is just too much bitterness here and people are too quick to classify behavior based on a few lone jerks. the bitterness is actually what drives people away.

people think they are on the defense but they are really playing offense with each other.


The problem is we live in a society where showing respect only earns you contempt, and, strangely enough, vice versa...


i think it's mainly the other way round.

acting badly gets a lot of attention.


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nilescrane
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26 Nov 2010, 12:37 am

Tim, I really don't care what you do with your life, but if you want to continue looking for the hot girl out of your league, you're just setting yourself up for disappointment.



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26 Nov 2010, 12:38 am

menintights wrote:
ToadOfSteel wrote:
The problem is we live in a society where showing respect only earns you contempt, and, strangely enough, vice versa...


Sounds like something a Nice Guy (TM) would say.

In other news, I like the direction this thread is taking. I'm gonna go get some popcorn now.


bring some with that cheese powder they sometimes offer at movie theatre's!



ToadOfSteel
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26 Nov 2010, 12:39 am

nilescrane wrote:
Tim, I really don't care what you do with your life, but if you want to continue looking for the hot girl out of your league, you're just setting yourself up for disappointment.


Is getting rid of his standards going to change anything? I mean, look at me...



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26 Nov 2010, 12:40 am

nilescrane wrote:
Tim, I really don't care what you do with your life, but if you want to continue looking for the hot girl out of your league, you're just setting yourself up for disappointment.


There are a lot of things you don't know about me.


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nilescrane
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26 Nov 2010, 12:50 am

Tim_Tex wrote:
nilescrane wrote:
Tim, I really don't care what you do with your life, but if you want to continue looking for the hot girl out of your league, you're just setting yourself up for disappointment.


There are a lot of things you don't know about me.


Tim, I'm not saying you don't deserve a girlfriend. But wouldn't you be happier with a girl that liked you for you, even if she wasn't your dream girl physically or anything close?



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26 Nov 2010, 1:15 am

I might be wrong, but I was never under the impression Tim has been trying to score stunners and supermodels.
Thats Craig.



nilescrane
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26 Nov 2010, 1:21 am

He has said on many occasions he wants a woman with huge breasts. Either way, he should have clarified.



Last edited by nilescrane on 26 Nov 2010, 2:00 am, edited 1 time in total.

nilescrane
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26 Nov 2010, 1:42 am

Tim, I hope I didn't offend you. My beef isn't with you, it's more in general with guys that want women out of their league. (Yes, we're all human beings, but there are leagues.) If that wasn't the case with you, you should have said something instead of arguing with me. It sounded like you were arguing in favor of awkward/not-hot guys getting hot NT girls.