Learn the BASIC rule: If she likes you, she WILL go out

Post Reply New Topic

Wow, another brilliant thread from the Love and Dating section! Grossly oversimplifying a grossly overcomplicated subject is surely the best way to explain things, right? Especially now, because dating today is much more complicated than it used to be. When you meet people today, they give you their facebook account instead of their phone number. In the old days, there was no facebook, no myspace, no e-mail, no texting, no instant messaging, there was either give someone your house number...or give them your home address so they can write you letters. And we wonder why our grandparents and parents generation have an easier time with dating. People are so afraid to take chances these days, so they make going on a date a big event, as if it's some sort of accomplishment to go on a date with a living, breathing member of the opposite sex. Even a phone call is a big deal nowadays. How much of a risk is it to give somebody your god damn phone number? What are they gonna do, sell it to some telemarketers? Some women are too afraid to give out their phone number for whatever reason...then they complain that guys are horrible and can't be trusted. How can you trust someone that you don't know that well? If you mainly use informal means of communication, then conveying your feelings becomes much harder to do. Women (at least in the U.S.) tend to see themselves as prizes that need to be won, and if you don't work hard enough to attain the prize, then you won't get it. It's at the point where the workload increases and the benefits decrease...sort of like the workforce. After all, a date is like a job interview in just about every conceivable way. And I personally don't see either one getting any easier anytime soon.

Now, I don't mean to rat on women so much, it's just that the title of the thread is about women. I could elaborate on the other side, but it wouldn't mean anything anyway. Besides, most of what I'm describing applies to both sexes. Maybe I'm a cynic, but I have a strong disdain for overly complicated affairs, and dating is a real pain in the ass when you mainly deal with people that have a sense of entitlement. The majority of people I've met have a problem with hanging out and talking on the phone, but no problem texting and communicating in a manner that keeps them safe from any direct harm. Even when hanging out, most of these people prefer to hang out in groups, so that way they can use their friends as a shield in case something goes wrong. It wasn't that long ago that texting was a secondary means of communication. Things can change alot in 5 years.

how is it just talk?

yes they can be talked into liking almost any guy

guys are extremely visual, if he doesn't like her looks she has no chance no matter what, you cannot talk a guy into liking a woman

women view a guy as "hot" when he has a good personality and respecting what he does for a living, how is this not being convinced into liking a guy?

a guy can appear to be a loser, but then she finds out he's the ceo of so and so corporation and all of a sudden he is attractive

he can appear to be ugly in her eyes but then learns he has everything in common with her and makes her laugh, all of a sudden she views him as "hot"

this is basically talking women into liking you, if she wasn't interested the moment she saw you, you talk her into liking you

how do you explain all the odd couples out there? you know great looking girl, barely average looking guy? how often do you see guys with model looks with women that aren't anywhere near as good looking? i never see it

do you think these women reacted to these "ugly" guys like they were brad pitt when they first laid eyes on them? hell no, these guys somehow convinced her that she was worth of her attention

no woman has ever stayed with a guy for an exteneded period of time just because he looks good, though guys stay with women like that all the time

women stay because the guy somehow convinced her that he is a catch

I think you have a much broader definition of "talking a girl into liking you" than I have. You've given examples of men using words to convey otherwise hidden information about themselves that a woman might find attractive.

I suppose a true sociopath would be able to figure out what any given woman would find attractive and then be able to verbally mimic it so well that she mistook his act for actual compatibility. I'm sure a sociopath really can talk any woman into liking him because he can say literally exactly what she specifically wants to hear. He could convince one woman he was an avid gun collector and then the next day convince another woman with different tastes in men that he was the president of Greenpeace. But that doesn't apply to most men (thank God). Any man can reveal hidden aspects of himself using words that a particular woman will find attractive. But not any woman. If a (non-sociopathic) man gets the notion that he can talk any woman into liking him, he is likely just going to be percieved as either annoying or a stalker when he doesn't realize that the woman he wants just doesn't like him back.

But if you take out the "any woman" part, I think it is good for men to know that when they verbally reveal their true selves, there will be some woman somewhere who will think "just my type" based on what he said. Just not every woman. It has to be the one who is attracted to what his words reveal.

That is, of course, if I could care less about getting a date with a woman. I believe there are ways of getting to know women without going through the whole dating thing. Dating is like applying for a job, which is another something I have never succeeded in. It's as if everyone is trying to break in through the front door when there's probably back doors, windows, and cat flaps to get in through.



You have probably less than 1 in 10,000 chance of getting a response if you don't contact any of the girls on the site. Even if you do get a response, you can bet it's a circulating scam or advert. Even women with poorly written profiles and no picture still get chatted up by some men. I contacted nearly 20 women on a dating site using a well written and honest profile before getting one response and after five exchanges, she didn't log in again.



And it's the same in the UK and anywhere else that allows citizens to have free speech. But not all women are like that. Once again, I think this is the perception of women one typically attempts to chat up in a pub or a club. But you're not alone. The rest of the men are, of course, go for women in bars and clubs. In response to this phonomenom, women are more on their guard so as to avoid being chatted up by any and every man, which may have them perceived as a s***.

One can, however, find nicer and less player-like women by going to a church, which would be quite obvious, but of course, I wouldn't blame you if you'd rather not since a lot of churches have a habit of trying to 'convert' everyone they can. But still, if you can find a church that isn't trying to indoctrinate you as soon as you walk in the door, you're probably on to a good thing.

Then there's also things like local events, music gigs (you stand a better chance by being a familliar face at these), creative groups (for art, poetry, writing, literature society, karaoke, etc), sports (though not everyone is into sport), fitness/gym, and so on.

As I said in my last post, if the play hard-to-get or they play anything for that matter of fact, they're probably going to play you around the whole time you're with them.

Actually they just date those people because they are the circles they get around with. Not to do with being "high status" they date the people they meet in their every day life.

***SARCASM ALERT*** Since of course all women are programmed to just know they should do this and she can always recall when she is free off the top of her head right? And of course, all women always know when he is asking her out because he is interested in her romantically because women couldn't possible have AS and be as socially dense as lead/sarcasm

Your logic is as erroneous as a woman assuming that if a man likes her, he will ask her out. It's very apparent from the posts of the men on here that that's not the case.

I most strongly disagree! Men have the ability to lower their standards when cornered into doing so. For example, let's say you're in your mid twenties, and the most a woman ever gave you was an uninspiring hug. You keep trying and trying, doing everything you can think of, and every time, you get rejected. Then one day, a woman you wouldn't look at twice in your younger, more hopeful days shows romantic interest in you. If you're desperate enough, you'd probably go on a date with her, and/or go further. Now, it wouldn't be fair to the woman, but this is beyond the scope of this post. (Heck, that's how I found my first girlfriend. Not exactly proud of it, but I don't blame myself for going that route.)

Women, on the other hand, do not have the ability to lower their standards. If a woman decided that a man is not attractive, physically or otherwise, she'll never date him, let alone sleep with him. Instead, the man will go straight into the friend zone. And almost nothing can get him out of it. If given a choice between being alone and dating someone unattractive, nearly all women will choose to be alone, and it's their right. But the truth remains.

Sounds like you need a lesson in.. umm... EVERYTHING.

What about all of those needy women with low self esteem who hate being alone and define their worth by whether or not they have a man?

First, my logic is 100% true because it's common sense.

Second, AS women represent merely 1% of women, you're not the norm.

Third, I stated real-life EXAMPLES under different circumstances and hence the "ie", the main point of these examples that a girl (of the majority!) who's genuinely busy yet interested would always leave a room for a second chance , if she really can't recall when she's free , she can always say "I ll let you know once I am free" for example , and not a dead-end answer.

Sure makes sense.

It's not common sense,and even if it were, common sense is what tells people the Earth is flat and also the center of the universe, or had so for many centuries until a few select few were smart enough to realize otherwise.

However, if you wish to cling to your socially dangerous misconceptions, I will leave you to the ruins of what could have been a good relationship with a woman who really did have to work that day.

Enjoy

Never heard of a woman who would just say to you "Sorry I'm busy" without adding something on the end to be polite. I live in England so I don't really know the standards in America.

On the other hand, just because a woman says "I'm busy, I'll let you know when I am free" could be a way of saying no if she happens never to call back. Again, may differ in America. Women in the UK always leave you hanging and then it's up to you to realise a week later that you've most probably been rejected.

Well, in America, Mr. It's-the-same-everywhere-you-go, if a woman tells you she is busy, it's usually translated into "What else you got, hotshot?" You are supposed to try again. After a certain point, you run out of chances, and then it's game over. Now, that's the same everywhere you go, but it's of a higher degree here.

Granted, the genetic laws of attraction are the same everywhere you go. It's the cultural ones that differ. Since America is the most complicated country on Earth, it should come as no surprise, especially in our sex-saturated culture, that dating is more complicated here. Women in the U.S. usually don't say "I'm busy, I'll call you in a week" because most people are too fond of self-deception to bring themselves to say something so brave. Men are the same way when it comes to self-deception (I mean, just look at this message board. NTs are horrible! Aspies are great! Women suck! Men rule the world!) but usually with dating, women don't ask men out.

So you are the Galileo of the dating world?

So tell me, are you busy tonight or tomorrow?

Maybe you can enlighten me!